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Main Street
CHAPTER 14
Sinclair Lewis
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       _ SHE was marching home.
       "No. I couldn't fall in love with him. I like him, very
       much. But he's too much of a recluse. Could I kiss him?
       No! No! Guy Pollock at twenty-six I could have kissed
       him then, maybe, even if I were married to some one else, and
       probably I'd have been glib in persuading myself that `it wasn't
       really wrong.'
       "The amazing thing is that I'm not more amazed at
       myself. I, the virtuous young matron. Am I to be trusted?
       If the Prince Charming came----
       "A Gopher Prairie housewife, married a year, and yearning
       for a `Prince Charming' like a bachfisch of sixteen! They
       say that marriage is a magic change. But I'm not changed.
       But----
       "No! I wouldn't want to fall in love, even if the Prince did
       come. I wouldn't want to hurt Will. I am fond of Will. I
       am! He doesn't stir me, not any longer. But I depend on
       him. He is home and children.
       "I wonder when we will begin to have children? I do
       want them.
       "I wonder whether I remembered to tell Bea to have
       hominy tomorrow, instead of oatmeal? She will have gone to
       bed by now. Perhaps I'll be up early enough----
       "Ever so fond of Will. I wouldn't hurt him, even if I had
       to lose the mad love. If the Prince came I'd look once at him,
       and run. Darn fast! Oh, Carol, you are not heroic nor
       fine. You are the immutable vulgar young female.
       "But I'm not the faithless wife who enjoys confiding that
       she's `misunderstood.' Oh, I'm not, I'm not!
       "Am I?
       "At least I didn't whisper to Guy about Will's faults and
       his blindness to my remarkable soul. I didn't! Matter of
       fact, Will probably understands me perfectly! If only--if
       he would just back me up in rousing the town.
       "How many, how incredibly many wives there must be who
       tingle over the first Guy Pollock who smiles at them. No! I
       will not be one of that herd of yearners! The coy virgin
       brides. Yet probably if the Prince were young and dared to
       face life----
       "I'm not half as well oriented as that Mrs. Dillon. So
       obviously adoring her dentist! And seeing Guy only as an
       eccentric fogy.
       "They weren't silk, Mrs. Dillon's stockings. They were
       lisle. Her legs are nice and slim. But no nicer than mine. I
       hate cotton tops on silk stockings. . . . Are my ankles getting
       fat? I will NOT have fat ankles!
       "No. I am fond of Will. His work--one farmer he pulls
       through diphtheria is worth all my yammering for a castle in
       Spain. A castle with baths.
       "This hat is so tight. I must stretch it. Guy liked it.
       "There's the house. I'm awfully chilly. Time to get out the
       fur coat. I wonder if I'll ever have a beaver coat? Nutria is
       NOT the same thing! Beaver-glossy. Like to run my fingers
       over it. Guy's mustache like beaver. How utterly absurd!
       "I AM, I am fond of Will, and---- Can't I ever find another
       word than `fond'?
       "He's home. He'll think I was out late.
       "Why can't he ever remember to pull down the shades? Cy
       Bogart and all the beastly boys peeping in. But the poor
       dear, he's absent-minded about minute--minush--whatever the
       word is. He has so much worry and work, while I do nothing
       but jabber to Bea.
       "I MUSTN'T forget the hominy----"
       She was flying into the hall. Kennicott looked up from the
       Journal of the American Medical Society.
       "Hello! What time did you get back?" she cried.
       "About nine. You been gadding. Here it is past eleven!"
       Good-natured yet not quite approving.
       "Did it feel neglected?"
       "Well, you didn't remember to close the lower draft in the
       furnace."
       "Oh, I'm so sorry. But I don't often forget things like
       that, do I?"
       She dropped into his lap and (after he had jerked back his
       head to save his eye-glasses, and removed the glasses, and
       settled her in a position less cramping to his legs, and casually
       cleared his throat) he kissed her amiably, and remarked:
       "Nope, I must say you're fairly good about things like that.
       I wasn't kicking. I just meant I wouldn't want the fire to go
       out on us. Leave that draft open and the fire might burn up
       and go out on us. And the nights are beginning to get pretty
       cold again. Pretty cold on my drive. I put the side-curtains
       up, it was so chilly. But the generator is working all right
       now."
       "Yes. It is chilly. But I feel fine after my walk."
       "Go walking?"
       "I went up to see the Perrys." By a definite act of will she
       added the truth: "They weren't in. And I saw Guy Pollock.
       Dropped into his office."
       "Why, you haven't been sitting and chinning with him
       till eleven o'clock?"
       "Of course there were some other people there and----
       Will! What do you think of Dr. Westlake?"
       "Westlake? Why?"
       "I noticed him on the street today."
       "Was he limping? If the poor fish would have his teeth
       X-rayed, I'll bet nine and a half cents he'd find an abscess
       there. `Rheumatism' he calls it. Rheumatism, hell! He's
       behind the times. Wonder he doesn't bleed himself I Wellllllll
       ----" A profound and serious yawn. "I hate to break up the
       party, but it's getting late, and a doctor never knows when
       he'll get routed out before morning." (She remembered that
       he had given this explanation, in these words, not less than
       thirty times in the year.) "I guess we better be trotting up
       to bed. I've wound the clock and looked at the furnace. Did
       you lock the front door when you came in?"
       They trailed up-stairs, after he had turned out the lights and
       twice tested the front door to make sure it was fast.
       While they talked they were preparing for bed. Carol still
       sought to maintain privacy by undressing behind the screen
       of the closet door. Kennicott was not so reticent. Tonight, as
       every night, she was irritated by having to push the old plush
       chair out of the way before she could open the closet door.
       Every time she opened the door she shoved the chair. Ten
       times an hour. But Kennicott liked to have the chair in the
       room, and there was no place for it except in front of the
       closet.
       She pushed it, felt angry, hid her anger. Kennicott was
       yawning, more portentously. The room smelled stale. She
       shrugged and became chatty:
       "You were speaking of Dr. Westlake. Tell me--you've
       never summed him up: Is he really a good doctor?"
       "Oh yes, he's a wise old coot."
       ("There! You see there is no medical rivalry. Not in my
       house!" she said triumphantly to Guy Pollock.)
       She hung her silk petticoat on a closet hook, and went on,
       "Dr. Westlake is so gentle and scholarly----"
       "Well, I don't know as I'd say he was such a whale of a
       scholar. I've always had a suspicion he did a good deal of
       four-flushing about that. He likes to have people think he
       keeps up his French and Greek and Lord knows what all; and
       he's always got an old Dago book lying around the sitting-room,
       but I've got a hunch he reads detective stories 'bout like the
       rest of us. And I don't know where he'd ever learn so dog-
       gone many languages anyway! He kind of lets people assume
       he went to Harvard or Berlin or Oxford or somewhere, but I
       looked him up in the medical register, and he graduated from
       a hick college in Pennsylvania, 'way back in 1861!"
       "But this is the important thing: Is he an honest doctor?"
       "How do you mean `honest'? Depends on what you mean."
       "Suppose you were sick. Would you call him in? Would
       you let me call him in?"
       "Not if I were well enough to cuss and bite, I wouldn't!
       No, SIR! I wouldn't have the old fake in the house. Makes
       me tired, his everlasting palavering and soft-soaping. He's
       all right for an ordinary bellyache or holding some fool woman's
       hand, but I wouldn't call him in for an honest-to-God illness,
       not much I wouldn't, NO--sir! You know I don't do much back-
       biting, but same time---- I'll tell you, Carrrie: I've never
       got over being sore at Westlake for the way he treated Mrs.
       Jonderquist. Nothing the matter with her, what she really
       needed was a rest, but Westlake kept calling on her and calling
       on her for weeks, almost every day, and he sent her a good
       big fat bill, too, you can bet! I never did forgive him for that.
       Nice decent hard-working people like the Jonderquists!"
       In her batiste nightgown she was standing at the bureau
       engaged in the invariable rites of wishing that she had a real
       dressing-table with a triple mirror, of bending toward the
       streaky glass and raising her chin to inspect a pin-head mole
       on her throat, and finally of brushing her hair. In rhythm to
       the strokes she went on:
       "But, Will, there isn't any of what you might call financial
       rivalry between you and the partners--Westlake and McGanum
       --is there?"
       He flipped into bed with a solemn back-somersault and a
       ludicrous kick of his heels as he tucked his legs under the
       blankets. He snorted, "Lord no! I never begrudge any man
       a nickel he can get away from me--fairly."
       "But is Westlake fair? Isn't he sly?"
       "Sly is the word. He's a fox, that boy!"
       She saw Guy Pollock's grin in the mirror. She flushed.
       Kennicott, with his arms behind his head, was yawning:
       "Yump. He's smooth, too smooth. But I bet I make prett'
       near as much as Westlake and McGanum both together, though
       I've never wanted to grab more than my just share. If anybody
       wants to go to the partners instead of to me, that's his
       business. Though I must say it makes me tired when Westlake
       gets hold of the Dawsons. Here Luke Dawson had been
       coming to me for every toeache and headache and a lot of
       little things that just wasted my time, and then when his
       grandchild was here last summer and had summer-complaint, I
       suppose, or something like that, probably--you know, the time
       you and I drove up to Lac-qui-Meurt--why, Westlake got hold
       of Ma Dawson, and scared her to death, and made her think
       the kid had appendicitis, and, by golly, if he and McGanum
       didn't operate, and holler their heads off about the terrible
       adhesions they found, and what a regular Charley and Will
       Mayo they were for classy surgery. They let on that if they'd
       waited two hours more the kid would have developed peritonitis,
       and God knows what all; and then they collected a nice fat
       hundred and fifty dollars. And probably they'd have charged
       three hundred, if they hadn't been afraid of me! I'm no hog,
       but I certainly do hate to give old Luke ten dollars' worth of
       advice for a dollar and a half, and then see a hundred and
       fifty go glimmering. And if I can't do a better 'pendectomy
       than either Westlake or McGanum, I'll eat my hat!"
       As she crept into bed she was dazzled by Guy's blazing
       grin. She experimented:
       "But Westlake is cleverer than his son-in-law, don't you
       think?"
       "Yes, Westlake may be old-fashioned and all that, but
       he's got a certain amount of intuition, while McGanum goes
       into everything bull-headed, and butts his way through like
       a damn yahoo, and tries to argue his patients into having
       whatever he diagnoses them as having! About the best thing
       Mac can do is to stick to baby-snatching. He's just about
       on a par with this bone-pounding chiropractor female, Mrs.
       Mattie Gooch."
       "Mrs. Westlake and Mrs. McGanum, though--they're nice.
       They've been awfully cordial to me."
       "Well, no reason why they shouldn't be, is there? Oh,
       they're nice enough--though you can bet your bottom dollar
       they're both plugging for their husbands all the time, trying
       to get the business. And I don't know as I call it so damn
       cordial in Mrs. McGanum when I holler at her on the street
       and she nods back like she had a sore neck. Still, she's all
       right. It's Ma Westlake that makes the mischief, pussyfooting
       around all the time. But I wouldn't trust any Westlake out
       of the whole lot, and while Mrs. McGanum SEEMS square
       enough, you don't never want to forget that she's Westlake's
       daughter. You bet!"
       "What about Dr. Gould? Don't you think he's worse than
       either Westlake or McGanum? He's so cheap--drinking, and
       playing pool, and always smoking cigars in such a cocky way----"
       "That's all right now! Terry Gould is a good deal of a tin-
       horn sport, but he knows a lot about medicine, and don't you
       forget it for one second!"
       She stared down Guy's grin, and asked more cheerfully, "Is
       he honest, too?"
       "Ooooooooooo! Gosh I'm sleepy!" He burrowed beneath
       the bedclothes in a luxurious stretch, and came up like a diver,
       shaking his head, as he complained, "How's that? Who?
       Terry Gould honest? Don't start me laughing--I'm too nice
       and sleepy! I didn't say he was honest. I said he had savvy
       enough to find the index in `Gray's Anatomy,' which is more
       than McGanum can do! But I didn't say anything about his
       being honest. He isn't. Terry is crooked as a dog's hind leg.
       He's done me more than one dirty trick. He told Mrs.
       Glorbach, seventeen miles out, that I wasn't up-to-date in
       obstetrics. Fat lot of good it did him! She came right in
       and told me! And Terry's lazy. He'd let a pneumonia patient
       choke rather than interrupt a poker game."
       "Oh no. I can't believe----"
       "Well now, I'm telling you!"
       "Does he play much poker? Dr. Dillon told me that Dr.
       Gould wanted him to play----"
       "Dillon told you what? Where'd you meet Dillon? He's
       just come to town."
       "He and his wife were at Mr. Pollock's tonight."
       "Say, uh, what'd you think of them? Didn't Dillon strike
       you as pretty light-waisted?"
       "Why no. He seemed intelligent. I'm sure he's much more
       wide-awake than our dentist."
       "Well now, the old man is a good dentist. He knows his
       business. And Dillon---- I wouldn't cuddle up to the Dillons
       too close, if I were you. All right for Pollock, and that's none
       of our business, but we---- I think I'd just give the Dillons
       the glad hand and pass 'em up."
       "But why? He isn't a rival."
       "That's--all--right!" Kennicott was aggressively awake
       now. "He'll work right in with Westlake and McGanum.
       Matter of fact, I suspect they were largely responsible for his
       locating here. They'll be sending him patients, and he'll send
       all that he can get hold of to them. I don't trust anybody
       that's too much hand-in-glove with Westlake. You give Dillon
       a shot at some fellow that's just bought a farm here and drifts
       into town to get his teeth looked at, and after Dillon gets
       through with him, you'll see him edging around to Westlake
       and McGanum, every time!"
       Carol reached for her blouse, which hung on a chair by
       the bed. She draped it about her shoulders, and sat up studying
       Kennicott, her chin in her hands. In the gray light from
       the small electric bulb down the hall she could see that he was
       frowning.
       "Will, this is--I must get this straight. Some one said to
       me the other day that in towns like this, even more than in
       cities, all the doctors hate each other, because of the
       money----"
       "Who said that?"
       "It doesn't matter."
       "I'll bet a hat it was your Vida Sherwin. She's a brainy
       woman, but she'd be a damn sight brainier if she kept her
       mouth shut and didn't let so much of her brains ooze out
       that way."
       "Will! O Will! That's horrible! Aside from the
       vulgarity----Some ways, Vida is my best friend. Even if
       she HAD said it. Which, as a matter of fact, she didn't."
       He reared up his thick shoulders, in absurd pink and green
       flannelette pajamas. He sat straight, and irritatingly snapped
       his fingers, and growled:
       "Well, if she didn't say it, let's forget her. Doesn't make
       any difference who said it, anyway. The point is that you
       believe it. God! To think you don't understand me any
       better than that! Money!"
       ("This is the first real quarrel we've ever had," she was
       agonizing.)
       He thrust out his long arm and snatched his wrinkly vest
       from a chair. He took out a cigar, a match. He tossed the
       vest on the floor. He lighted the cigar and puffed savagely.
       He broke up the match and snapped the fragments at the foot-
       board.
       She suddenly saw the foot-board of the bed as the foot-
       stone of the grave of love.
       The room was drab-colored and ill-ventilated-Kennicott
       did not "believe in opening the windows so darn wide that you
       heat all outdoors." The stale air seemed never to change. In
       the light from the hall they were two lumps of bedclothes
       with shoulders and tousled heads attached.
       She begged, "I didn't mean to wake you up, dear. And
       please don't smoke. You've been smoking so much. Please
       go back to sleep. I'm sorry."
       "Being sorry 's all right, but I'm going to tell you one or
       two things. This falling for anybody's say-so about medical
       jealousy and competition is simply part and parcel of your
       usual willingness to think the worst you possibly can of us
       poor dubs in Gopher Prairie. Trouble with women like you
       is, you always want to ARGUE. Can't take things the way they
       are. Got to argue. Well, I'm not going to argue about this
       in any way, shape, manner, or form. Trouble with you is,
       you don't make any effort to appreciate us. You're so damned
       superior, and think the city is such a hell of a lot finer place,
       and you want us to do what YOU want, all the time----"
       "That's not true! It's I who make the effort. It's they--
       it's you--who stand back and criticize. I have to come over
       to the town's opinion; I have to devote myself to their
       interests. They can't even SEE my interests, to say nothing of
       adopting them. I get ever so excited about their old Lake
       Minniemashie and the cottages, but they simply guffaw (in
       that lovely friendly way you advertise so much) if I speak
       of wanting to see Taormina also."
       "Sure, Tormina, whatever that is--some nice expensive
       millionaire colony, I suppose. Sure; that's the idea; champagne
       taste and beer income; and make sure that we never will have
       more than a beer income, too!"
       "Are you by any chance implying that I am not economical?"
       "Well, I hadn't intended to, but since you bring it up
       yourself, I don't mind saying the grocery bills are about twice
       what they ought to be."
       "Yes, they probably are. I'm not economical. I can't be.
       Thanks to you!"
       "Where d' you get that `thanks to you'?"
       "Please don't be quite so colloquial--or shall I say VULGAR?"
       "I'll be as damn colloquial as I want to. How do you get
       that `thanks to you'? Here about a year ago you jump me
       for not remembering to give you money. Well, I'm reasonable.
       I didn't blame you, and I SAID I was to blame. But have
       I ever forgotten it since--practically?"
       "No. You haven't--practically! But that isn't it. I
       ought to have an allowance. I will, too! I must have an
       agreement for a regular stated amount, every month."
       "Fine idea! Of course a doctor gets a regular stated
       amount! Sure! A thousand one month--and lucky if he
       makes a hundred the next."
       "Very well then, a percentage. Or something else. No
       matter how much you vary, you can make a rough average
       for----"
       "But what's the idea? What are you trying to get at?
       Mean to say I'm unreasonable? Think I'm so unreliable and
       tightwad that you've got to tie me down with a contract?
       By God, that hurts! I thought I'd been pretty generous and
       decent, and I took a lot of pleasure--thinks I, `she'll be tickled
       when I hand her over this twenty'--or fifty, or whatever it
       was; and now seems you been wanting to make it a kind of
       alimony. Me, like a poor fool, thinking I was liberal all the
       while, and you----"
       "Please stop pitying yourself! You're having a beautiful
       time feeling injured. I admit all you say. Certainly. You've
       given me money both freely and amiably. Quite as if I were
       your mistress!"
       "Carrie!"
       "I mean it! What was a magnificent spectacle of generosity
       to you was humiliation to me. You GAVE me money--gave it
       to your mistress, if she was complaisant, and then you----"
       "Carrie!"
       "(Don't interrupt me!)--then you felt you'd discharged
       all obligation. Well, hereafter I'll refuse your money, as a gift.
       Either I'm your partner, in charge of the household department
       of our business, with a regular budget for it, or else I'm
       nothing. If I'm to be a mistress, I shall choose my lovers. Oh,
       I hate it--I hate it--this smirking and hoping for money--and
       then not even spending it on jewels as a mistress has a right
       to, but spending it on double-boilers and socks for you!
       Yes indeed! You're generous! You give me a dollar, right
       out--the only proviso is that I must spend it on a tie for you!
       And you give it when and as you wish. How can I be anything
       but uneconomical?"
       "Oh well, of course, looking at it that way----"
       "I can't shop around, can't buy in large quantities, have
       to stick to stores where I have a charge account, good deal
       of the time, can't plan because I don't know how much money
       I can depend on. That's what I pay for your charming
       sentimentalities about giving so generously. You make me----"
       "Wait! Wait! You know you're exaggerating. You never
       thought about that mistress stuff till just this minute! Matter
       of fact, you never have `smirked and hoped for money.' But
       all the same, you may be right. You ought to run the household
       as a business. I'll figure out a definite plan tomorrow,
       and hereafter you'll be on a regular amount or percentage, with
       your own checking account."
       "Oh, that IS decent of you!" She turned toward him,
       trying to be affectionate. But his eyes were pink and unlovely
       in the flare of the match with which he lighted his dead and
       malodorous cigar. His head drooped, and a ridge of flesh
       scattered with pale small bristles bulged out under his chin.
       She sat in abeyance till he croaked:
       "No. 'Tisn't especially decent. It's just fair. And God
       knows I want to be fair. But I expect others to be fair, too.
       And you're so high and mighty about people. Take Sam
       Clark; best soul that ever lived, honest and loyal and a damn
       good fellow----"
       ("Yes, and a good shot at ducks, don't forget that!")
       ("Well, and he is a good shot, too!) Sam drops around in
       the evening to sit and visit, and by golly just because he
       takes a dry smoke and rolls his cigar around in his mouth, and
       maybe spits a few times, you look at him as if he was a hog.
       Oh, you didn't know I was onto you, and I certainly hope
       Sam hasn't noticed it, but I never miss it."
       "I have felt that way. Spitting--ugh! But I'm sorry you
       caught my thoughts. I tried to be nice; I tried to hide them."
       "Maybe I catch a whole lot more than you think I do!"
       "Yes, perhaps you do."
       "And d' you know why Sam doesn't light his cigar when
       he's here?"
       "Why?"
       "He's so darn afraid you'll be offended if he smokes. You
       scare him. Every time he speaks of the weather you jump
       him because he ain't talking about poetry or Gertie--Goethe?
       --or some other highbrow junk. You've got him so leery he
       scarcely dares to come here."
       "Oh, I AM sorry. (Though I'm sure it's you who are exaggerating now.")
       "Well now, I don't know as I am! And I can tell you one thing:
       if you keep on you'll manage to drive away every friend I've got."
       "That would be horrible of me. You KNOW I don't mean
       to Will, what is it about me that frightens Sam--if I
       do frighten him."
       "Oh, you do, all right! 'Stead of putting his legs up on
       another chair, and unbuttoning his vest, and telling a good
       story or maybe kidding me about something, he sits on the
       edge of his chair and tries to make conversation about politics,
       and he doesn't even cuss, and Sam's never real comfortable
       unless he can cuss a little!"
       "In other words, he isn't comfortable unless he can behave
       like a peasant in a mud hut!"
       "Now that'll be about enough of that! You want to know
       how you scare him? First you deliberately fire some question
       at him that you know darn well he can't answer--any fool
       could see you were experimenting with him--and then you
       shock him by talking of mistresses or something, like you were
       doing just now----"
       "Of course the pure Samuel never speaks of such erring
       ladies in his private conversations!"
       "Not when there's ladies around! You can bet your life
       on that!"
       "So the impurity lies in failing to pretend that----"
       "Now we won't go into all that--eugenics or whatever damn
       fad you choose to call it. As I say, first you shock him, and
       then you become so darn flighty that nobody can follow you.
       Either you want to dance, or you bang the piano, or else you
       get moody as the devil and don't want to talk or anything
       else. If you must be temperamental, why can't you be that
       way by yourself?"
       "My dear man, there's nothing I'd like better than to be
       by myself occasionally! To have a room of my own! I
       suppose you expect me to sit here and dream delicately and
       satisfy my `temperamentality' while you wander in from the
       bathroom with lather all over your face, and shout, `Seen my
       brown pants?' "
       "Huh!" He did not sound impressed. He made no
       answer. He turned out of bed, his feet making one solid thud
       on the floor. He marched from the room, a grotesque figure
       in baggy union-pajamas. She heard him drawing a drink of
       water at the bathroom tap. She was furious at the
       contemptuousness of his exit. She snuggled down in bed, and
       looked away from him as he returned. He ignored her. As
       he flumped into bed he yawned, and casually stated:
       "Well, you'll have plenty of privacy when we build a new
       house.
       "When!"
       "Oh, I'll build it all right, don't you fret! But of course
       I don't expect any credit for it."
       Now it was she who grunted "Huh!" and ignored him,
       and felt independent and masterful as she shot up out of bed,
       turned her back on him, fished a lone and petrified chocolate
       out of her glove-box in the top right-hand drawer of the
       bureau, gnawed at it, found that it had cocoanut filling, said
       "Damn!" wished that she had not said it, so that she might
       be superior to his colloquialism, and hurled the chocolate into
       the wastebasket, where it made an evil and mocking clatter
       among the debris of torn linen collars and toothpaste box.
       Then, in great dignity and self-dramatization, she returned to
       bed.
       All this time he had been talking on, embroidering his
       assertion that he "didn't expect any credit." She was reflecting
       that he was a rustic, that she hated him, that she had been
       insane to marry him, that she had married him only because
       she was tired of work, that she must get her long gloves
       cleaned, that she would never do anything more for him, and
       that she mustn't forget his hominy for breakfast. She was
       roused to attention by his storming:
       "I'm a fool to think about a new house. By the time I
       get it built you'll probably have succeeded in your plan to get
       me completely in Dutch with every friend and every patient
       I've got."
       She sat up with a bounce. She said coldly, "Thank you
       very much for revealing your real opinion of me. If that's the
       way you feel, if I'm such a hindrance to you, I can't stay
       under this roof another minute. And I am perfectly well able
       to earn my own living. I will go at once, and you may get a
       divorce at your pleasure! What you want is a nice sweet cow
       of a woman who will enjoy having your dear friends talk about
       the weather and spit on the floor!"
       "Tut! Don't be a fool!"
       "You will very soon find out whether I'm a fool or not!
       I mean it! Do you think I'd stay here one second after I
       found out that I was injuring you? At least I have enough
       sense of justice not to do that."
       "Please stop flying off at tangents, Carrie. This----"
       "Tangents? TANGENTS! Let me tell you----"
       "----isn't a theater-play; it's a serious effort to have us
       get together on fundamentals. We've both been cranky, and
       said a lot of things we didn't mean. I wish we were a couple o'
       bloomin' poets and just talked about roses and moonshine, but
       we're human. All right. Let's cut out jabbing at each other.
       Let's admit we both do fool things. See here: You KNOW you
       feel superior to folks. You're not as bad as I say, but you're
       not as good as you say--not by a long shot! What's the reason
       you're so superior? Why can't you take folks as they are?"
       Her preparations for stalking out of the Doll's House were
       not yet visible. She mused:
       "I think perhaps it's my childhood." She halted. When
       she went on her voice had an artificial sound, her words the
       bookish quality of emotional meditation. "My father was the
       tenderest man in the world, but he did feel superior to ordinary
       people. Well, he was! And the Minnesota Valley---- I used
       to sit there on the cliffs above Mankato for hours at a time,
       my chin in my hand, looking way down the valley, wanting to
       write poems. The shiny tilted roofs below me, and the river,
       and beyond it the level fields in the mist, and the rim of
       palisades across---- It held my thoughts in. I LIVED, in the
       valley. But the prairie--all my thoughts go flying off into the
       big space. Do you think it might be that?"
       "Um, well, maybe, but---- Carrie, you always talk so
       much about getting all you can out of life, and not letting
       the years slip by, and here you deliberately go and deprive
       yourself of a lot of real good home pleasure by not enjoying
       people unless they wear frock coats and trot out----"
       ("Morning clothes. Oh. Sorry. Didn't mean t' interrupt
       you.")
       "----to a lot of tea-parties. Take Jack Elder. You think
       Jack hasn't got any ideas about anything but manufacturing
       and the tariff on lumber. But do you know that Jack is
       nutty about music? He'll put a grand-opera record on the
       phonograph and sit and listen to it and close his eyes---- Or
       you take Lym Cass. Ever realize what a well-informed man
       he is?"
       "But IS he? Gopher Prairie calls anybody `well-informed'
       who's been through the State Capitol and heard about Gladstone."
       "Now I'm telling you! Lym reads a lot--solid stuff--
       history. Or take Mart Mahoney, the garageman. He's got a lot
       of Perry prints of famous pictures in his office. Or old Bingham
       Playfair, that died here 'bout a year ago--lived seven miles
       out. He was a captain in the Civil War, and knew General
       Sherman, and they say he was a miner in Nevada right alongside
       of Mark Twain. You'll find these characters in all these
       small towns, and a pile of savvy in every single one of them,
       if you just dig for it."
       "I know. And I do love them. Especially people like
       Champ Perry. But I can't be so very enthusiastic over the
       smug cits like Jack Elder."
       "Then I'm a smug cit, too, whatever that is."
       "No, you're a scientist. Oh, I will try and get the music
       out of Mr. Elder. Only, why can't he let it COME out, instead
       of being ashamed of it, and always talking about hunting dogs?
       But I will try. Is it all right now?"
       "Sure. But there's one other thing. You might give me
       some attention, too!"
       "That's unjust! You have everything I am!"
       "No, I haven't. You think you respect me--you always
       hand out some spiel about my being so `useful.' But you
       never think of me as having ambitions, just as much as you
       haves----"
       "Perhaps not. I think of you as being perfectly satisfied."
       "Well, I'm not, not by a long shot! I don't want to be
       a plug general practitioner all my life, like Westlake, and die
       in harness because I can't get out of it, and have 'em say,
       `He was a good fellow, but he couldn't save a cent.' Not that
       I care a whoop what they say, after I've kicked in and can't
       hear 'em, but I want to put enough money away so you and
       I can be independent some day, and not have to work unless
       I feel like it, and I want to have a good house--by golly, I'll
       have as good a house as anybody in THIS town!--and if we
       want to travel and see your Tormina or whatever it is, why
       we can do it, with enough money in our jeans so we won't
       have to take anything off anybody, or fret about our old age.
       You never worry about what might happen if we got sick and
       didn't have a good fat wad salted away, do you!"
       "I don't suppose I do."
       "Well then, I have to do it for you. And if you think for
       one moment I want to be stuck in this burg all my life, and
       not have a chance to travel and see the different points of
       interest and all that, then you simply don't get me. I want
       to have a squint at the world, much's you do. Only, I'm practical
       about it. First place, I'm going to make the money--
       I'm investing in good safe farmlands. Do you understand
       why now?"
       "Yes."
       "Will you try and see if you can't think of me as something
       more than just a dollar-chasing roughneck?"
       "Oh, my dear, I haven't been just! I AM difficile. And
       I won't call on the Dillons! And if Dr. Dillon is working
       for Westlake and McGanum, I hate him!" _