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Seventeen
CHAPTER XV. ROMANCE OF STATISTICS
Booth Tarkington
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       _ On a warm morning, ten days later, William
       stood pensively among his mother's flower-
       beds behind the house, his attitude denoting a
       low state of vitality. Not far away, an aged
       negro sat upon a wheelbarrow in the hot sun,
       tremulously yet skilfully whittling a piece of
       wood into the shape of a boat, labor more to his
       taste, evidently, than that which he had abandoned
       at the request of Jane. Allusion to this
       preference for a lighter task was made by Genesis,
       who was erecting a trellis on the border of the
       little garden.
       ``Pappy whittle all day,'' he chuckled. ``Whittle
       all night, too! Pappy, I thought you 'uz
       goin' to git 'at long bed all spade' up fer me by
       noon. Ain't 'at what you tole me?''
       ``You let him alone, Genesis,'' said Jane, who
       sat by the old man's side, deeply fascinated.
       ``There's goin' to be a great deal of rain in the
       next few days. maybe, an' I haf to have this boat
       ready.''
       The aged darky lifted his streaky and diminished
       eyes to the burnished sky, and laughed.
       ``Rain come some day, anyways,'' he said. ``We
       git de boat ready 'fo' she fall, dat sho.'' His
       glance wandered to William and rested upon him
       with feeble curiosity. ``Dat ain' yo' pappy, is
       it?'' he asked Jane.
       ``I should say it isn't!'' she exclaimed. ``It's
       Willie. He was only seventeen about two or
       three months ago, Mr. Genesis.'' This was not
       the old man's name, but Jane had evolved it,
       inspired by respect for one so aged and so kind
       about whittling. He was the father of Genesis,
       and the latter, neither to her knowledge nor to
       her imagination, possessed a surname.
       ``I got cat'rack in my lef' eye,'' said Mr.
       Genesis, ``an' de right one, she kine o' tricksy,
       too. Tell black man f'um white man, little f'um
       big.''
       ``I'd hate it if he was papa,'' said Jane,
       confidentially. ``He's always cross about somep'm,
       because he's in love.'' She approached her
       mouth to her whittling friend's ear and continued
       in a whisper: ``He's in love of Miss Pratt.
       She's out walkin' with Joe Bullitt. I was in the
       front yard with Willie, an' we saw 'em go by.
       He's mad.''
       William did not hear her. Moodily, he had
       discovered that there was something amiss with
       the buckle of his belt, and, having ungirded
       himself, he was biting the metal tongue of the
       buckle in order to straighten it. This fell under
       the observation of Genesis, who remonstrated.
       ``You break you' teef on 'at buckle,'' he said.
       ``No, I won't, either,'' William returned,
       crossly.
       ``Ain' my teef,'' said Genesis. ``Break 'em,
       you want to!''
       The attention of Mr. Genesis did not seem to be
       attracted to the speakers; he continued his whittling
       in a craftsman-like manner, which brought
       praise from Jane.
       ``You can see to whittle, Mr. Genesis,'' she
       said. ``You whittle better than anybody in the
       world.''
       ``I speck so, mebbe,'' Mr. Genesis returned,
       with a little complacency. ``How ole yo' pappy?''
       ``Oh, he's OLD!'' Jane explained.
       William deigned to correct her. ``He's not
       old, he's middle-aged.''
       ``Well, suh,'' said Mr. Genesis, ``I had three
       chillum 'fo' I 'uz twenty. I had two when I 'uz
       eighteem.''
       William showed sudden interest. ``You did!''
       he exclaimed. ``How old were you when you
       had the first one?''
       ``I 'uz jes' yo' age,'' said the old man. ``I 'uz
       seventeem.''
       ``By George!'' cried William.
       Jane seemed much less impressed than William,
       seventeen being a long way from ten,
       though, of course, to seventeen itself hardly any
       information could be imagined as more interesting
       than that conveyed by the words of the aged
       Mr. Genesis. The impression made upon William
       was obviously profound and favorable.
       ``By George!'' he cried again.
       ``Genesis he de youngis' one,'' said the old
       man. ``Genesis he 'uz bawn when I 'uz sixty-one.''
       William moved closer. ``What became of the
       one that was born when you were seventeen?''
       he asked.
       ``Well, suh,'' said Mr. Genesis, ``I nev' did
       know.''
       At this, Jane's interest equaled William's.
       Her eyes consented to leave the busy hands
       of the aged darky, and, much enlarged, rose to
       his face. After a little pause of awe and
       sympathy she inquired:
       ``Was it a boy or a girl?''
       The old man deliberated within himself.
       ``Seem like it mus' been a boy.''
       ``Did it die?'' Jane asked, softly.
       ``I reckon it mus' be dead by now,'' he
       returned, musingly. ``Good many of 'em dead:
       what I KNOWS is dead. Yes'm, I reckon so.''
       ``How old were you when you were married?''
       William asked, with a manner of peculiar
       earnestness;--it was the manner of one who
       addresses a colleague.
       ``Me? Well, suh, dat 'pen's.'' He seemed to
       search his memory. ``I rickalect I 'uz ma'ied
       once in Looavle,'' he said.
       Jane's interest still followed the first child.
       ``Was that where it was born, Mr. Genesis?'' she
       asked.
       He looked puzzled, and paused in his whittling
       to rub his deeply corrugated forehead. ``Well,
       suh, mus' been some bawn in Looavle. Genesis,''
       he called to his industrious son, ``whaih 'uz YOU
       bawn?''
       ``Right 'n 'is town,'' laughed Genesis. ``You
       fergit a good deal, pappy, but I notice you don'
       fergit come to meals!''
       The old man grunted, resuming his whittling
       busily. ``Hain' much use,'' he complained.
       ``Cain' eat nuff'm 'lessen it all gruelly. Man
       cain' eat nuff'm 'lessen he got teef. Genesis,
       di'n' I hyuh you tellin' dis white gemmun take
       caih his teef--not bite on no i'on?''
       William smiled in pity. ``I don't need to
       bother about that, I guess,'' he said. ``I can
       crack nuts with my teeth.''
       ``Yes, suh,'' said the old man. ``You kin now.
       Ev'y nut you crac' now goin' cos' you a yell
       when you git 'long 'bout fawty an' fifty. You
       crack nuts now an' you'll holler den!''
       ``Well, I guess I won't worry myself much now
       about what won't happen till I'm forty or fifty,''
       said William. ``My teeth 'll last MY time, I
       guess.''
       That brought a chuckle from Mr. Genesis.
       ``Jes' listen!'' he exclaimed. ``Young man
       think he ain' nev' goin' be ole man. Else he think,
       `Dat ole man what I'm goin' to be, dat ain'
       goin' be me 'tall--dat goin' be somebody else!
       What I caih 'bout dat ole man? I ain't a-goin'
       take caih o' no teef fer HIM!' Yes, suh, an' den
       when he GIT to be ole man, he say, `What become
       o' dat young man I yoosta be? Where is dat
       young man agone to? He 'uz a fool, dat's what
       --an' _I_ ain' no fool, so he mus' been somebody
       else, not me; but I do jes' wish I had him hyuh
       'bout two minutes--long enough to lam him
       fer not takin' caih o' my teef fer me!' Yes, suh!''
       William laughed; his good humor was restored
       and he found the conversation of Mr. Genesis
       attractive. He seated himself upon an upturned
       bucket near the wheelbarrow, and reverted to a
       former theme. ``Well, I HAVE heard of people
       getting married even younger 'n you were,'' he said.
       ``You take India, for instance. Why, they get
       married in India when they're twelve, and even
       seven and eight years old.''
       ``They do not!'' said Jane, promptly. ``Their
       mothers and fathers wouldn't let 'em, an' they
       wouldn't want to, anyway.''
       ``I suppose you been to India and know all
       about it!'' William retorted. ``For the matter o'
       that, there was a young couple got married in
       Pennsylvania the other day; the girl was only
       fifteen, and the man was sixteen. It was in the
       papers, and their parents consented, and said
       it was a good thing. Then there was a case in
       Fall River, Massachusetts, where a young man
       eighteen years old married a woman forty-one
       years old; it was in the papers, too. And I
       heard of another case somewhere in Iowa--a boy
       began shaving when he was thirteen, and shaved
       every day for four years, and now he's got a full
       beard, and he's goin' to get married this year--
       before he's eighteen years old. Joe Bullitt's got
       a cousin in Iowa that knows about this case--he
       knows the girl this fellow with the beard is
       goin' to marry, and he says he expects it 'll turn
       out the best thing could have happened. They're
       goin' to live on a farm. There's hunderds of
       cases like that, only you don't hear of more'n
       just a few of 'em. People used to get married at
       sixteen, seventeen, eighteen--anywhere in there
       --and never think anything of it at all. Right up
       to about a hunderd years ago there were more
       people married at those ages than there were
       along about twenty-four and twenty-five, the way
       they are now. For instance, you take Shakespeare--''
       William paused.
       Mr. Genesis was scraping the hull of the miniature
       boat with a piece of broken glass, in lieu of
       sandpaper, but he seemed to be following his
       young friend's remarks with attention. William
       had mentioned Shakespeare impulsively, in the
       ardor of demonstrating his point; however, upon
       second thought he decided to withdraw the name.
       ``I mean, you take the olden times,'' he went
       on; ``hardly anybody got married after they
       were nineteen or twenty years old, unless they
       were widowers, because they were all married
       by that time. And right here in our own county,
       there were eleven couples married in the last
       six months under twenty-one years of age.
       I've got a friend named Johnnie Watson; his
       uncle works down at the court-house and told
       him about it, so it can't be denied. Then there
       was a case I heard of over in--''
       Mr. Genesis uttered a loud chuckle. ``My
       goo'ness!'' he exclaimed. ``How you c'leck all'
       dem fac's? Lan' name! What puzzlin' ME is
       how you 'member 'em after you done c'leck 'em.
       Ef it uz me I couldn't c'leck 'em in de firs' place,
       an' ef I could, dey wouldn' be no use to me,
       'cause I couldn't rickalect 'em!''
       ``Well, it isn't so hard,'' said William, ``if you
       kind of get the hang of it.'' Obviously pleased,
       he plucked a spear of grass and placed it between
       his teeth, adding, ``I always did have a pretty
       good memory.''
       ``Mamma says you're the most forgetful boy
       she ever heard of,'' said Jane, calmly. ``She
       says you can't remember anything two minutes.''
       William's brow darkened. ``Now look here--''
       he began, with severity.
       But the old darky intervened. ``Some folks
       got good rickaleckshum an' some folks got bad,''
       he said, pacifically. ``Young white germmun
       rickalect mo' in two minute dan what I kin in two
       years!''
       Jane appeared to accept this as settlement of
       the point at issue, while William bestowed upon
       Mr. Genesis a glance of increased favor. William's
       expression was pleasant to see; in fact,
       it was the pleasantest expression Jane had seen
       him wearing for several days. Almost always,
       lately, he was profoundly preoccupied, and so
       easily annoyed that there was no need to be
       careful of his feelings, because--as his mother
       observed--he was ``certain to break out about
       every so often, no matter what happened!''
       ``I remember pretty much everything,'' he
       said, as if in modest explanation of the performance
       which had excited the aged man's admira-
       tion. ``I can remember things that happened
       when I was four years old.''
       ``So can I,'' said Jane. ``I can remember
       when I was two. I had a kitten fell down the
       cistern and papa said it hurt the water.''
       ``My goo'ness!'' Mr. Genesis exclaimed. ``An'
       you 'uz on'y two year ole, honey! Bes' _I_ kin do
       is rickalect when I 'uz 'bout fifty.''
       ``Oh no!'' Jane protested. ``You said you
       remembered havin' a baby when you were seventeen,
       Mr. Genesis.''
       ``Yes'm,'' he admitted. ``I mean rickalect
       good like you do 'bout yo' li'l' cat an' all how yo'
       pappy tuck on 'bout it. I kin rickalect SOME,
       but I cain' rickalect GOOD.''
       William coughed with a certain importance.
       ``Do you remember,'' he asked, ``when you
       were married, how did you feel about it? Were
       you kind of nervous, or anything like that, before-
       hand?''
       Mr. Genesis again passed a wavering hand
       across his troubled brow.
       ``I mean,'' said William, observing his
       perplexity, ``were you sort of shaky--f'rinstance, as
       if you were taking an important step in life?''
       ``Lemme see.'' The old man pondered for a
       moment. ``I felt mighty shaky once, I rickalect;
       dat time yalla m'latta man shootin' at me
       f 'um behime a snake-fence.''
       ``Shootin' at you!'' Jane cried, stirred from her
       accustomed placidity. ``Mr. Genesis! What
       DID he do that for?''
       ``Nuff'm!'' replied Mr. Genesis, with feeling.
       ``Nuff'm in de wide worl'! He boun' to shoot
       SOMEbody, an' pick on me 'cause I 'uz de
       handies'.''
       He closed his knife, gave the little boat a final
       scrape with the broken glass, and then a soothing
       rub with the palm of his hand. ``Dah, honey,''
       he said--and simultaneously factory whistles began
       to blow. ``Dah yo' li'l' steamboat good as I
       kin git her widout no b'iler ner no smoke-
       stack. I reckon yo' pappy 'll buy 'em fer you.''
       Jane was grateful. ``It's a beautiful boat,
       Mr. Genesis. I do thank you!''
       Genesis, the son, laid aside his tools and
       approached. ``Pappy finish whittlin' spang on
       'em noon whistles,'' he chuckled. ``Come 'long,
       pappy. I bet you walk fas' 'nuff goin' todes
       dinnuh. I hear fry-cakes ploppin' in skillet!''
       Mr. Genesis laughed loudly, his son's words
       evidently painting a merry and alluring picture; and
       the two, followed by Clematis, moved away in
       the direction of the alley gate. William and
       Jane watched the brisk departure of the antique
       with sincere esteem and liking.
       ``He must have been sixteen,'' said William,
       musingly.
       ``When?'' Jane asked.
       William, in deep thought, was still looking
       after Mr. Genesis; he was almost unconscious
       that he had spoken aloud and he replied, automatically:
       ``When he was married.''
       Then, with a start, he realized into how great a
       condescension he had been betrayed, and hastily
       added, with pronounced hauteur, ``Things you
       don't understand. You run in the house.''
       Jane went into the house, but she did not
       carry her obedience to the point of running.
       She walked slowly, and in that state of profound
       reverie which was characteristic of her when she
       was immersed in the serious study of William's
       affairs. _