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Letters of Mark Twain (complete), The
VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXVII - LETTERS, 1898, TO HOWELLS AND TWICHELL. LIFE IN VIENNA. PAYMENT OF THE DEBTS. ASSASSINATION OF THE EMPRESS
Mark Twain
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       _ The end of January saw the payment of the last of Mark Twain's debts.
       Once more he stood free before the world--a world that sounded his
       praises. The latter fact rather amused him. "Honest men must be pretty
       scarce," he said, "when they make so much fuss over even a defective
       specimen." When the end was in sight Clemens wrote the news to Howells
       in a letter as full of sadness as of triumph.
       To W. D. Howells, in New York:
       HOTEL METROPOLE,
       VIENNA, Jan. 22, '98.
       DEAR HOWELLS,--Look at those ghastly figures. I used to write it
       "Hartford, 1871." There was no Susy then--there is no Susy now. And how
       much lies between--one long lovely stretch of scented fields, and
       meadows, and shady woodlands, and suddenly Sahara! You speak of the
       glorious days of that old time--and they were. It is my quarrel--that
       traps like that are set. Susy and Winnie given us, in miserable sport,
       and then taken away.
       About the last time I saw you I described to you the culminating disaster
       in a book I was going to write (and will yet, when the stroke is further
       away)--a man's dead daughter brought to him when he had been through all
       other possible misfortunes--and I said it couldn't be done as it ought to
       be done except by a man who had lived it--it must be written with the
       blood out of a man's heart. I couldn't know, then, how soon I was to be
       made competent. I have thought of it many a time since. If you were
       here I think we could cry down each other's necks, as in your dream.
       For we are a pair of old derelicts drifting around, now, with some of our
       passengers gone and the sunniness of the others in eclipse.
       I couldn't get along without work now. I bury myself in it up to the
       ears. Long hours--8 and 9 on a stretch, sometimes. And all the days,
       Sundays included. It isn't all for print, by any means, for much of it
       fails to suit me; 50,000 words of it in the past year. It was because of
       the deadness which invaded me when Susy died. But I have made a change
       lately--into dramatic work--and I find it absorbingly entertaining.
       I don't know that I can write a play that will play: but no matter, I'll
       write half a dozen that won't, anyway. Dear me, I didn't know there was
       such fun in it. I'll write twenty that won't play. I get into immense
       spirits as soon as my day is fairly started. Of course a good deal of
       this friskiness comes of my being in sight of land--on the Webster & Co.
       debts, I mean. (Private.) We've lived close to the bone and saved every
       cent we could, and there's no undisputed claim, now, that we can't cash.
       I have marked this "private" because it is for the friends who are
       attending to the matter for us in New York to reveal it when they want to
       and if they want to. There are only two claims which I dispute and which
       I mean to look into personally before I pay them. But they are small.
       Both together they amount to only $12,500. I hope you will never get the
       like of the load saddled onto you that was saddled onto me 3 years ago.
       And yet there is such a solid pleasure in paying the things that I reckon
       maybe it is worth while to get into that kind of a hobble, after all.
       Mrs. Clemens gets millions of delight out of it; and the children have
       never uttered one complaint about the scrimping, from the beginning.
       We all send you and all of you our love.
       MARK.
       Howells wrote: "I wish you could understand how unshaken you are,
       you old tower, in every way; your foundations are struck so deep
       that you will catch the sunshine of immortal years, and bask in the
       same light as Cervantes and Shakespeare."
       The Clemens apartments at the Metropole became a sort of social
       clearing-house of the Viennese art and literary life, much more like
       an embassy than the home of a mere literary man. Celebrities in
       every walk of life, persons of social and official rank, writers for
       the press, assembled there on terms hardly possible in any other
       home in Vienna. Wherever Mark Twain appeared in public he was a
       central figure. Now and then he read or spoke to aid some benefit,
       and these were great gatherings attended by members of the royal
       family. It was following one such event that the next letter was
       written.
       (Private)
       To Rev. J. H. Twichell, in Hartford:
       HOTEL METROPOLE,
       VIENNA, Feb. 3, '98.
       DEAR JOE, There's that letter that I began so long ago--you see how
       it is: can't get time to finish anything. I pile up lots of work,
       nevertheless. There may be idle people in the world, but I'm not one of
       them. I say "Private" up there because I've got an adventure to tell,
       and you mustn't let a breath of it get out. First I thought I would lay
       it up along with a thousand others that I've laid up for the same
       purpose--to talk to you about, but--those others have vanished out of my
       memory; and that must not happen with this.
       The other night I lectured for a Vienna charity; and at the end of it
       Livy and I were introduced to a princess who is aunt to the heir apparent
       of the imperial throne--a beautiful lady, with a beautiful spirit, and
       very cordial in her praises of my books and thanks to me for writing
       them; and glad to meet me face to face and shake me by the hand--just the
       kind of princess that adorns a fairy tale and makes it the prettiest tale
       there is.
       Very well, we long ago found that when you are noticed by supremacies,
       the correct etiquette is to go, within a couple of days, and pay your
       respects in the quite simple form of writing your name in the Visitors'
       Book kept in the office of the establishment. That is the end of it, and
       everything is squared up and ship-shape.
       So at noon today Livy and I drove to the Archducal palace, and got by the
       sentries all right, and asked the grandly-uniformed porter for the book
       and said we wished to write our names in it. And he called a servant in
       livery and was sending us up stairs; and said her Royal Highness was out
       but would soon be in. Of course Livy said "No--no--we only want the
       book;" but he was firm, and said, "You are Americans?"
       "Yes."
       "Then you are expected, please go up stairs."
       "But indeed we are not expected--please let us have the book and--"
       "Her Royal Highness will be back in a very little while--she commanded me
       to tell you so--and you must wait."
       Well, the soldiers were there close by--there was no use trying to
       resist--so we followed the servant up; but when he tried to beguile us
       into a drawing-room, Livy drew the line; she wouldn't go in. And she
       wouldn't stay up there, either. She said the princess might come in at
       any moment and catch us, and it would be too infernally ridiculous for
       anything. So we went down stairs again--to my unspeakable regret. For
       it was too darling a comedy to spoil. I was hoping and praying the
       princess would come, and catch us up there, and that those other
       Americans who were expected would arrive, and be taken for impostors by
       the portier, and shot by the sentinels--and then it would all go into the
       papers, and be cabled all over the world, and make an immense stir and be
       perfectly lovely. And by that time the princess would discover that we
       were not the right ones, and the Minister of War would be ordered out,
       and the garrison, and they would come for us, and there would be another
       prodigious time, and that would get cabled too, and--well, Joe, I was in
       a state of perfect bliss. But happily, oh, so happily, that big portier
       wouldn't let us out--he was sorry, but he must obey orders--we must go
       back up stairs and wait. Poor Livy--I couldn't help but enjoy her
       distress. She said we were in a fix, and how were we going to explain,
       if the princess should arrive before the rightful Americans came? We
       went up stairs again--laid off our wraps, and were conducted through one
       drawing room and into another, and left alone there and the door closed
       upon us.
       Livy was in a state of mind! She said it was too theatrically
       ridiculous; and that I would never be able to keep my mouth shut; that I
       would be sure to let it out and it would get into the papers--and she
       tried to make me promise--"Promise what?" I said--"to be quiet about
       this? Indeed I won't--it's the best thing that ever happened; I'll tell
       it, and add to it; and I wish Joe and Howells were here to make it
       perfect; I can't make all the rightful blunders myself--it takes all
       three of us to do justice to an opportunity like this. I would just like
       to see Howells get down to his work and explain, and lie, and work his
       futile and inventionless subterfuges when that princess comes raging in
       here and wanting to know." But Livy could not hear fun--it was not a
       time to be trying to be funny--we were in a most miserable and shameful
       situation, and if--
       Just then the door spread wide and our princess and 4 more, and 3 little
       princes flowed in! Our princess, and her sister the Archduchess Marie
       Therese (mother to the imperial Heir and to the young girl Archduchesses
       present, and aunt to the 3 little princes)--and we shook hands all around
       and sat down and had a most sociable good time for half an hour--and by
       and by it turned out that we were the right ones, and had been sent for
       by a messenger who started too late to catch us at the hotel. We were
       invited for 2 o'clock, but we beat that arrangement by an hour and a
       half.
       Wasn't it a rattling good comedy situation? Seems a kind of pity we were
       the right ones. It would have been such nuts to see the right ones come,
       and get fired out, and we chatting along comfortably and nobody
       suspecting us for impostors.
       We send lots and lots of love.
       MARK.
       The reader who has followed these pages has seen how prone Mark
       Twain was to fall a victim to the lure of a patent-right--how he
       wasted several small fortunes on profitless contrivances, and one
       large one on that insatiable demon of intricacy and despair, the
       Paige type-setter. It seems incredible that, after that experience
       and its attending disaster, he should have been tempted again. But
       scarcely was the ink dry on the receipts from his creditors when he
       was once more borne into the clouds on the prospect of millions,
       perhaps even billions, to be made from a marvelous carpet-pattern
       machine, the invention of Sczezepanik, an Austrian genius. That
       Clemens appreciated his own tendencies is shown by the parenthetic
       line with which he opens his letter on the subject to Mr. Rogers.
       Certainly no man was ever a more perfect prototype of Colonel
       Sellers than the creator of that lovely, irrepressible visionary.
       To Mr. Rogers, in New York:
       March 24, '98.
       DEAR MR. ROGERS,--(I feel like Col. Sellers).
       Mr. Kleinberg [agent for Sczezepanik] came according to appointment, at
       8.30 last night, and brought his English-speaking Secretary. I asked
       questions about the auxiliary invention (which I call "No. 2 ") and got
       as good an idea of it as I could. It is a machine. It automatically
       punches the holes in the jacquard cards, and does it with mathematical
       accuracy. It will do for $1 what now costs $3. So it has value, but
       "No. 2" is the great thing(the designing invention.) It saves $9 out of
       $10 and the jacquard looms must have it.
       Then I arrived at my new project, and said to him in substance, this:
       "You are on the point of selling the No. 2 patents to Belgium, Italy,
       etc. I suggest that you stop those negotiations and put those people off
       two or three months. They are anxious now, they will not be less anxious
       then--just the reverse; people always want a thing that is denied them.
       "So far as I know, no great world-patent has ever yet been placed in the
       grip of a single corporation. This is a good time to begin.
       "We have to do a good deal of guess-work here, because we cannot get hold
       of just the statistics we want. Still, we have some good statistics--and
       I will use those for a test.
       "You say that of the 1500 Austrian textile factories, 800 use the
       jacquard. Then we will guess that of the 4,000 American factories 2,000
       use the jacquard and must have our No. 2.
       "You say that a middle-sized Austrian factory employs from 20 to 30
       designers and pays them from 800 to 3,000 odd florins a year--(a florin
       is 2 francs). Let us call the average wage 1500 florins ($600).
       "Let us apply these figures (the low wages too) to the 2,000 American
       factories--with this difference, to guard against over-guessing; that
       instead of allowing for 20 to 30 designers to a middle-sized factory, we
       allow only an average of 10 to each of the 2,000 factories--a total of
       20,000 designers. Wages at $600, a total of $12,000,000. Let us
       consider that No. 2 will reduce this expense to $2,000,000 a year. The
       saving is $5,000,000 per each of the $200,000,000 of capital employed in
       the jacquard business over there.
       "Let us consider that in the countries covered by this patent, an
       aggregate of $1,500,000,000 of capital is employed in factories requiring
       No. 2.
       "The saving (as above) is $75,000,000 a year. The Company holding in its
       grip all these patents would collar $50,000,000 of that, as its share.
       Possibly more.
       "Competition would be at an end in the Jacquard business, on this planet.
       Price-cutting would end. Fluctuations in values would cease. The
       business would be the safest and surest in the world; commercial panics
       could not seriously affect it; its stock would be as choice an investment
       as Government bonds. When the patents died the Company would be so
       powerful that it could still keep the whole business in its hands. Would
       you like to grant me the privilege of placing the whole jacquard business
       of the world in the grip of a single Company? And don't you think that
       the business would grow-grow like a weed?"
       "Ach, America--it is the country of the big! Let me get my breath--then
       we will talk."
       So then we talked--talked till pretty late. Would Germany and England
       join the combination? I said the Company would know how to persuade
       them.
       Then I asked for a Supplementary Option, to cover the world, and we
       parted.
       I am taking all precautions to keep my name out of print in connection
       with this matter. And we will now keep the invention itself out of print
       as well as we can. Descriptions of it have been granted to the "Dry
       Goods Economist" (New York) and to a syndicate of American papers. I
       have asked Mr. Kleinberg to suppress these, and he feels pretty sure he
       can do it.
       With love,
       S. L. C.
       If this splendid enthusiasm had not cooled by the time a reply came
       from Mr. Rogers, it must have received a sudden chill from the
       letter which he inclosed--the brief and concise report from a
       carpet-machine expert, who said: "I do not feel that it would be of
       any value to us in our mills, and the number of jacquard looms in
       America is so limited that I am of the opinion that there is no
       field for a company to develop the invention here. A cursory
       examination of the pamphlet leads me to place no very high value
       upon the invention, from a practical standpoint."
       With the receipt of this letter carpet-pattern projects would seem
       to have suddenly ceased to be a factor in Mark Twain's calculations.
       Such a letter in the early days of the type-machine would have saved
       him a great sum in money and years of disappointment. But perhaps
       he would not have heeded it then.
       The year 1898 brought the Spanish-American War. Clemens was
       constitutionally against all wars, but writing to Twichell, whose
       son had enlisted, we gather that this one was an exception.
       To Rev. J. H. Twichell, in Hartford:
       KALTENLEUTGEBEN, NEAR VIENNA,
       June 17, '98.
       DEAR JOE,--You are living your war-days over again in Dave, and it must
       be a strong pleasure, mixed with a sauce of apprehension--enough to make
       it just schmeck, as the Germans say. Dave will come out with two or
       three stars on his shoulder-straps if the war holds, and then we shall
       all be glad it happened.
       We started with Bull Run, before. Dewey and Hobson have introduced an
       improvement on the game this time.
       I have never enjoyed a war-even in written history--as I am enjoying this
       one. For this is the worthiest one that was ever fought, so far as my
       knowledge goes. It is a worthy thing to fight for one's freedom; it is
       another sight finer to fight for another man's. And I think this is the
       first time it has been done.
       Oh, never mind Charley Warner, he would interrupt the raising of Lazarus.
       He would say, the will has been probated, the property distributed, it
       will be a world of trouble to settle the rows--better leave well enough
       alone; don't ever disturb anything, where it's going to break the soft
       smooth flow of things and wobble our tranquillity.
       Company! (Sh! it happens every day--and we came out here to be quiet.)
       Love to you all.
       MARK.
       They were spending the summer at Kaltenleutgeben, a pleasant village
       near Vienna, but apparently not entirely quiet. Many friends came
       out from Vienna, including a number of visiting Americans. Clemens,
       however, appears to have had considerable time for writing, as we
       gather from the next to Howells.
       To W. D. Howells, in America:
       KALTENLEUTGEBEN, BEI WIEN,
       Aug. 16, '98.
       DEAR HOWELLS,--Your letter came yesterday. It then occurred to me that I
       might have known (per mental telegraph) that it was due; for a couple of
       weeks ago when the Weekly came containing that handsome reference to me I
       was powerfully moved to write you; and my letter went on writing itself
       while I was at work at my other literature during the day. But next day
       my other literature was still urgent--and so on and so on; so my letter
       didn't get put into ink at all. But I see now, that you were writing,
       about that time, therefore a part of my stir could have come across the
       Atlantic per mental telegraph. In 1876 or '75 I wrote 40,000 words of a
       story called "Simon Wheeler" wherein the nub was the preventing of an
       execution through testimony furnished by mental telegraph from the other
       side of the globe. I had a lot of people scattered about the globe who
       carried in their pockets something like the old mesmerizer-button, made
       of different metals, and when they wanted to call up each other and have
       a talk, they "pressed the button" or did something, I don't remember
       what, and communication was at once opened. I didn't finish the story,
       though I re-began it in several new ways, and spent altogether 70,000
       words on it, then gave it up and threw it aside.
       This much as preliminary to this remark: some day people will be able to
       call each other up from any part of the world and talk by mental
       telegraph--and not merely by impression, the impression will be
       articulated into words. It could be a terrible thing, but it won't be,
       because in the upper civilizations everything like sentimentality (I was
       going to say sentiment) will presently get materialized out of people
       along with the already fading spiritualities; and so when a man is called
       who doesn't wish to talk he will be like those visitors you mention: "not
       chosen"--and will be frankly damned and shut off.
       Speaking of the ill luck of starting a piece of literary work wrong-and
       again and again; always aware that there is a way, if you could only
       think it out, which would make the thing slide effortless from the pen-
       the one right way, the sole form for you, the other forms being for men
       whose line those forms are, or who are capabler than yourself: I've had
       no end of experience in that (and maybe I am the only one--let us hope
       so.) Last summer I started 16 things wrong--3 books and 13 mag.
       articles--and could only make 2 little wee things, 1500 words altogether,
       succeed:--only that out of piles and stacks of diligently-wrought MS.,
       the labor of 6 weeks' unremitting effort. I could make all of those
       things go if I would take the trouble to re-begin each one half a dozen
       times on a new plan. But none of them was important enough except one:
       the story I (in the wrong form) mapped out in Paris three or four years
       ago and told you about in New York under seal of confidence--no other
       person knows of it but Mrs. Clemens--the story to be called "Which was
       the Dream?"
       A week ago I examined the MS--10,000 words--and saw that the plan was a
       totally impossible one-for me; but a new plan suggested itself, and
       straightway the tale began to slide from the pen with ease and
       confidence. I think I've struck the right one this time. I have already
       put 12,000 words of it on paper and Mrs. Clemens is pretty outspokenly
       satisfied with it-a hard critic to content. I feel sure that all of the
       first half of the story--and I hope three-fourths--will be comedy; but by
       the former plan the whole of it (except the first 3 chapters) would have
       been tragedy and unendurable, almost. I think I can carry the reader a
       long way before he suspects that I am laying a tragedy-trap. In the
       present form I could spin 16 books out of it with comfort and joy; but I
       shall deny myself and restrict it to one. (If you should see a little
       short story in a magazine in the autumn called "My Platonic Sweetheart"
       written 3 weeks ago) that is not this one. It may have been a
       suggester, though.
       I expect all these singular privacies to interest you, and you are not to
       let on that they don't.
       We are leaving, this afternoon, for Ischl, to use that as a base for the
       baggage, and then gad around ten days among the lakes and mountains to
       rest-up Mrs. Clemens, who is jaded with housekeeping. I hope I can get a
       chance to work a little in spots--I can't tell. But you do it--therefore
       why should you think I can't?
       [Remainder missing.]
       The dream story was never completed. It was the same that he had
       worked on in London, and perhaps again in Switzerland. It would be
       tried at other times and in other forms, but it never seemed to
       accommodate itself to a central idea, so that the good writing in it
       eventually went to waste. The short story mentioned, "My Platonic
       Sweetheart," a charming, idyllic tale, was not published during Mark
       Twain's lifetime. Two years after his death it appeared in Harper's
       Magazine.
       The assassination of the Empress of Austria at Geneva was the
       startling event of that summer. In a letter to Twichell Clemens
       presents the tragedy in a few vivid paragraphs. Later he treated it
       at some length in a magazine article which, very likely because of
       personal relations with members of the Austrian court, he withheld
       from print. It has since been included in a volume of essays, What
       Is Man, etc.
       To Rev. J. H. Twichell, in Hartford:
       KALTENLEUTGEBEN, Sep. 13, '98.
       DEAR JOE,--You are mistaken; people don't send us the magazines. No--
       Harper, Century and McClure do; an example I should like to recommend to
       other publishers. And so I thank you very much for sending me Brander's
       article. When you say "I like Brander Matthews; he impresses me as a man
       of parts and power," I back you, right up to the hub--I feel the same
       way--. And when you say he has earned your gratitude for cuffing me for
       my crimes against the Leather stockings and the Vicar, I ain't making any
       objection. Dern your gratitude!
       His article is as sound as a nut. Brander knows literature, and loves
       it; he can talk about it and keep his temper; he can state his case so
       lucidly and so fairly and so forcibly that you have to agree with him,
       even when you don't agree with him; and he can discover and praise such
       merits as a book has, even when they are half a dozen diamonds scattered
       through an acre of mud. And so he has a right to be a critic.
       To detail just the opposite of the above invoice is to describe me. I
       haven't any right to criticise books, and I don't do it except when I
       hate them. I often want to criticise Jane Austen, but her books madden
       me so that I can't conceal my frenzy from the reader; and therefore I
       have to stop every time I begin.
       That good and unoffending lady the Empress is killed by a mad-man, and I
       am living in the midst of world-history again. The Queen's jubilee last
       year, the invasion of the Reichsrath by the police, and now this murder,
       which will still be talked of and described and painted a thousand years
       from now. To have a personal friend of the wearer of the crown burst in
       at the gate in the deep dusk of the evening and say in a voice broken
       with tears, "My God the Empress is murdered," and fly toward her home
       before we can utter a question-why, it brings the giant event home to
       you, makes you a part of it and personally interested; it is as if your
       neighbor Antony should come flying and say "Caesar is butchered--the head
       of the world is fallen!"
       Of course there is no talk but of this. The mourning is universal and
       genuine, the consternation is stupefying. The Austrian Empire is being
       draped with black. Vienna will be a spectacle to see, by next Saturday,
       when the funeral cortege marches. We are invited to occupy a room in the
       sumptuous new hotel (the "Krantz" where we are to live during the Fall
       and Winter) and view it, and we shall go.
       Speaking of Mrs. Leiter, there is a noble dame in Vienna, about whom they
       retail similar slanders. She said in French--she is weak in French--that
       she had been spending a Sunday afternoon in a gathering of the
       "demimonde." Meaning the unknown land, that mercantile land, that
       mysterious half-world which underlies the aristocracy. But these
       Malaproperies are always inventions--they don't happen.
       Yes, I wish we could have some talks; I'm full to the eye-lids. Had a
       noble good one with Parker and Dunham--land, but we were grateful for
       that visit!
       Yours with all our loves.
       MARK.
       [Inclosed with the foregoing.]
       Among the inadequate attempts to account for the assassination we must
       concede high rank to the German Emperor's. He justly describes it as a
       "deed unparalleled for ruthlessness," and then adds that it was "ordained
       from above."
       I think this verdict will not be popular "above." A man is either a free
       agent or he isn't. If a man is a free agent, this prisoner is
       responsible for what he has done; but if a man is not a free agent, if
       the deed was ordained from above, there is no rational way of making this
       prisoner even partially responsible for it, and the German court cannot
       condemn him without manifestly committing a crime. Logic is logic; and
       by disregarding its laws even Emperors as capable and acute as William II
       can be beguiled into making charges which should not be ventured upon
       except in the shelter of plenty of lightning-rods.
       MARK.
       The end of the year 1898 found Mark Twain once more in easy, even
       luxurious, circumstances. The hard work and good fortune which had
       enabled him to pay his debts had, in the course of another year,
       provided what was comparative affluence: His report to Howells is
       characteristic and interesting.
       To W. D. Howells, in New York:
       HOTEL KRANTZ, WIEN, L. NEVER MARKT 6
       Dec. 30, '98.
       DEAR HOWELLS,--I begin with a date--including all the details--though I
       shall be interrupted presently by a South-African acquaintance who is
       passing through, and it may be many days before I catch another leisure
       moment. Note how suddenly a thing can become habit, and how
       indestructible the habit is, afterward! In your house in Cambridge a
       hundred years ago, Mrs. Howells said to me, "Here is a bunch of your
       letters, and the dates are of no value, because you don't put any in--
       the years, anyway." That remark diseased me with a habit which has cost
       me worlds of time and torture and ink, and millions of vain efforts and
       buckets of tears to break it, and here it is yet--I could easier get rid
       of a virtue.....
       I hope it will interest you (for I have no one else who would much care
       to know it) that here lately the dread of leaving the children in
       difficult circumstances has died down and disappeared and I am now having
       peace from that long, long nightmare, and can sleep as well as anyone.
       Every little while, for these three years, now, Mrs. Clemens has come
       with pencil and paper and figured up the condition of things (she keeps
       the accounts and the bank-book) and has proven to me that the clouds were
       lifting, and so has hoisted my spirits temporarily and kept me going till
       another figuring-up was necessary. Last night she figured up for her own
       satisfaction, not mine, and found that we own a house and furniture in
       Hartford; that my English and American copyrights pay an income which
       represents a value of $200,000; and that we have $107,000 cash in the
       bank. I have been out and bought a box of 6-cent cigars; I was smoking
       4 1/2 centers before.
       At the house of an English friend, on Christmas Eve, we saw the Mouse-
       Trap played and well played. I thought the house would kill itself with
       laughter. By George they played with life! and it was most
       devastatingly funny. And it was well they did, for they put us Clemenses
       in the front seat, and if they played it poorly I would have assaulted
       them. The head young man and girl were Americans, the other parts were
       taken by English, Irish and Scotch girls. Then there was a nigger-
       minstrel show, of the genuine old sort, and I enjoyed that, too, for the
       nigger-show was always a passion of mine. This one was created and
       managed by a Quaker doctor from Philada., (23 years old) and he was the
       middle man. There were 9 others--5 Americans from 5 States and a
       Scotchman, 2 Englishmen and an Irishman--all post-graduate-medical young
       fellows, of course--or, it could be music; but it would be bound to be
       one or the other.
       It's quite true--I don't read you "as much as I ought," nor anywhere near
       half as much as I want to; still I read you all I get a chance to.
       I saved up your last story to read when the numbers should be complete,
       but before that time arrived some other admirer of yours carried off the
       papers. I will watch admirers of yours when the Silver Wedding journey
       begins, and that will not happen again. The last chance at a bound book
       of yours was in London nearly two years ago--the last volume of your
       short things, by the Harpers. I read the whole book twice through and
       some of the chapters several times, and the reason that that was as far
       as I got with it was that I lent it to another admirer of yours and he is
       admiring it yet. Your admirers have ways of their own; I don't know
       where they get them.
       Yes, our project is to go home next autumn if we find we can afford to
       live in New York. We've asked a friend to inquire about flats and
       expenses. But perhaps nothing will come of it. We do afford to live in
       the finest hotel in Vienna, and have 4 bedrooms, a dining-room, a
       drawing-room, 3 bath-rooms and 3 Vorzimmers, (and food) but we couldn't
       get the half of it in New York for the same money ($600 a month).
       Susy hovers about us this holiday week, and the shadows fall all about us
       of
       "The days when we went gipsying
       A long time ago."
       Death is so kind, so benignant, to whom he loves; but he goes by us
       others and will not look our way. We saw the "Master of Palmyra" last
       night. How Death, with the gentleness and majesty, made the human grand-
       folk around him seem little and trivial and silly!
       With love from all of us to all of you.
       MARK. _
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FOREWORD
MARK TWAIN--A BIOGRAPHICAL SUMMARY
VOLUME I - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1835[1853]-1866
   VOLUME I - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1835[1853]-1866 - CHAPTER I - EARLY LETTERS, 1853. NEW YORK AND PHILADELPHIA
   VOLUME I - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1835[1853]-1866 - CHAPTER II - LETTERS 1856-61. KEOKUK, AND THE RIVER. END OF PILOTING
   VOLUME I - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1835[1853]-1866 - CHAPTER III - LETTERS 1861-62. ON THE FRONTIER. MINING ADVENTURES. JOURNALISTIC BEGINNINGS
   VOLUME I - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1835[1853]-1866 - CHAPTER IV - LETTERS 1863-64. "MARK TWAIN." COMSTOCK JOURNALISM. ARTEMUS WARD
   VOLUME I - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1835[1853]-1866 - CHAPTER V - LETTERS 1864-66. SAN FRANCISCO AND HAWAII
   VOLUME I - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1835[1853]-1866 - CHAPTER VI - LETTERS 1866-67. THE LECTURER. SUCCESS ON THE COAST. IN NEW YORK.THE GREAT OCEAN EXCURSION
VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER VIIa - To Bret Harte
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER VIIb - LETTERS 1867. THE TRAVELER. THE VOYAGE OF THE "QUAKER CITY"
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER VIII - LETTERS 1867-68. WASHINGTON AND SAN FRANCISCO. THE PROPOSED BOOK OF TRAVEL. A NEW LECTURE
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER IX - LETTERS 1868-70. COURTSHIP, AND "THE INNOCENTS ABROAD"
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER X - LETTERS 1870-71. MARK TWAIN IN BUFFALO. MARRIAGE. THE BUFFALO EXPRESS. "MEMORANDA."
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER XI - LETTERS 1871-72. REMOVAL TO HARTFORD. A LECTURE TOUR. "ROUGHING IT." FIRST LETTER TO HOWELLS
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER XII - LETTERS 1872-73. MARK TWAIN IN ENGLAND. LONDON HONORS. ACQUAINTANCE WITH DR. JOHN BROWN. A LECTURE TRIUMPH. "THE GILDED AGE"
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER XIII - LETTERS 1874. HARTFORD AND ELMIRA. A NEW STUDY. BEGINNING "TOM SAWYER." THE SELLERS PLAY.
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER XIV - LETTERS 1874. MISSISSIPPI CHAPTERS. VISITS TO BOSTON. A JOKE ON ALDRICH
   VOLUME II - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1867-1875 - CHAPTER XV - LETTERS FROM HARTFORD, 1875. MUCH CORRESPONDENCE WITH HOWELLS
VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XVI - LETTERS, 1876, CHIEFLY TO W. D. HOWELLS. LITERATURE AND POLITICS. PLANNING A PLAY WITH BRET HARTE
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XVII - LETTERS, 1877. TO BERMUDA WITH TWICHELL. PROPOSITION TO TH. NAST. THE WHITTIER DINNER
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XVIII - LETTERS FROM EUROPE, 1878-79. TRAMPING WITH TWICHELL. WRITING A NEW TRAVEL BOOK. LIFE IN MUNICH
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XIX - LETTERS 1879. RETURN TO AMERICA. THE GREAT GRANT REUNION
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XX - LETTERS OF 1880, CHIEFLY TO HOWELLS. "THE PRINCE AND THE PAUPER." MARK TWAIN MUGWUMP SOCIETY
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XXI - LETTERS 1881, TO HOWELLS AND OTHERS. LITERARY PLANS ASSISTING A YOUNG SCULPTOR. LITERARY PLANS
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XXII - LETTERS, 1882, MAINLY TO HOWELLS. WASTED FURY. OLD SCENES REVISITED. THE MISSISSIPPI BOOK
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XXIII - LETTERS, 1883, TO HOWELLS AND OTHERS. A GUEST OF THE MARQUIS OF LORNE. THE HISTORY GAME. A PLAY BY HOWELLS AND MARK TWAIN
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XXIV - LETTERS, 1884, TO HOWELLS AND OTHERS. CABLE'S GREAT APRIL FOOL. "HUCK FINN" IN PRESS. MARK TWAIN FOR CLEVELAND. CLEMENS AND CABLE
   VOLUME III - TWAIN'S LETTERS 1876-1885 - CHAPTER XXV - THE GREAT YEAR OF 1885. CLEMENS AND CABLE. PUBLICATION OF "HUCK FINN." THE GRANT MEMOIRS. MARK TWAIN AT FIFTY
VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXVI - LETTERS, 1886-87. JANE CLEMENS'S ROMANCE. UNMAILED LETTERS, ETC.
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXVII - MISCELLANEOUS LETTERS OF 1887. LITERARY ARTICLES. PEACEFUL DAYS AT THE FARM. FAVORITE READING. APOLOGY TO MRS. CLEVELAND, ETC.
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXVIII - LETTERS,1888. A YALE DEGREE. WORK ON "THE YANKEE." ON INTERVIEWING, ETC.
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXIX - LETTERS, 1889. THE MACHINE. DEATH OF MR. CRANE. CONCLUSION OF THE YANKEE
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXX - LETTERS, 1890, CHIEFLY TO JOS. T. GOODMAN. THE GREAT MACHINE ENTERPRISE
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXI - LETTERS, 1891, TO HOWELLS, MRS. CLEMENS AND OTHERS. RETURN TO LITERATURE. AMERICAN CLAIMANT. LEAVING HARTFORD.EUROPE. DOWN THE RHINE
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXII - LETTERS, 1892, CHIEFLY TO MR. HALL AND MRS. CRANE. IN BERLIN, MENTONE, BAD-NAUHEIM, FLORENCE
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXIII - LETTERS, 1893, TO MR. HALL, MRS. CLEMENS, AND OTHERS. FLORENCE. BUSINESS TROUBLES. "PUDD'NHEAD WILSON." "JOAN OF ARC." AT THE PLAYERS, NEW YORK
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXIV - LETTERS 1894. A WINTER IN NEW YORK. BUSINESS FAILURE. END OF THE MACHINE
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXV - LETTERS, 1895-96, TO H. H. ROGERS AND OTHERS. FINISHING "JOAN OF ARC." THE TRIP AROUND THE WORLD. DEATH OF SUSY CLEMENS
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXVI - LETTERS 1897. LONDON, SWITZERLAND, VIENNA
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXVII - LETTERS, 1898, TO HOWELLS AND TWICHELL. LIFE IN VIENNA. PAYMENT OF THE DEBTS. ASSASSINATION OF THE EMPRESS
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXVIII - LETTERS, 1899, TO HOWELLS AND OTHERS. VIENNA. LONDON. A SUMMER IN SWEDEN
   VOLUME IV - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1886-1900 - CHAPTER XXXIX - LETTERS OF 1900, MAINLY TO TWICHELL. THE BOER WAR. BOXER TROUBLES. THE RETURN TO AMERICA
VOLUME V - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1901-1906
   VOLUME V - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1901-1906 - CHAPTER XL - LETTERS OF 1901, CHIEFLY TO TWICHELL. MARK TWAIN AS A REFORMER. SUMMER AT SARANAC. ASSASSINATION OF PRESIDENT McKINLEY
   VOLUME V - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1901-1906 - CHAPTER XLI - LETTERS OF 1902. RIVERDALE. YORK HARBOR. ILLNESS OF MRS. CLEMENS
   VOLUME V - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1901-1906 - CHAPTER XLII - LETTERS OF 1903. TO VARIOUS PERSONS. HARD DAYS AT RIVERDALE. LAST SUMMER AT ELMIRA. THE RETURN TO ITALY
   VOLUME V - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1901-1906 - CHAPTER XLIII - LETTERS OF 1904. TO VARIOUS PERSONS. LIFE IN VILLA QUARTO. DEATH OF MRS. CLEMENS. THE RETURN TO AMERICA
   VOLUME V - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1901-1906 - CHAPTER XLIV - LETTERS OF 1905. TO TWICHELL, MR. DUNEKA AND OTHERS. POLITICS AND HUMANITY. A SUMMER A SUMMER AT DUBLIN. MARK TWAIN AT 70
   VOLUME V - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1901-1906 - CHAPTER XLV - LETTERS, 1906, TO VARIOUS PERSONS. THE FAREWELL LECTURE. A SECOND SUMMER IN DUBLIN. BILLIARDS AND COPYRIGHT
VOLUME VI - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1907-1910
   VOLUME VI - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1907-1910 - CHAPTER XLVI - LETTERS 1907-08. A DEGREE FROM OXFORD. THE NEW HOME AT REDDING
   VOLUME VI - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1907-1910 - CHAPTER XLVII - LETTERS, 1909. TO HOWELLS AND OTHERS. LIFE AT STORMFIELD. COPYRIGHT EXTENSION. DEATH OF JEAN CLEMENS
   VOLUME VI - MARK TWAIN'S LETTERS 1907-1910 - CHAPTER XLVIII - LETTERS OF 1910. LAST TRIP TO BERMUDA. LETTERS TO PAINE. THE LAST LETTER