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Little Minister, The
Chapter XI - Tells in a Whisper of Man's Fall during the Curling Season
James Matthew Barrie
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       _ No snow could be seen in Thrums by the beginning of the year,
       though clods of it lay in Waster Lunny's fields, where his hens
       wandered all day as if looking for something they had dropped. A
       black frost had set in, and one walking on the glen road could
       imagine that through the cracks in it he saw a loch glistening.
       From my door I could hear the roar of curling stones at Rashie-
       bog, which is almost four miles nearer Thrums. On the day I am
       recalling, I see that I only made one entry in my diary, "At last
       bought Waster Lunny's bantams." Well do I remember the
       transaction, and no wonder, for I had all but bought the bantams
       every day for a six months.
       About noon the doctor's dog-cart was observed by all the Tenements
       standing at the Auld Licht manse. The various surmises were wrong.
       Margaret had not been suddenly taken ill; Jean had not swallowed a
       darning-needle; the minister had not walked out at his study
       window in a moment of sublime thought. Gavin stepped into the dog-
       cart, which at once drove off in the direction of Rashie-bog, but
       equally in error were those who said that the doctor was making a
       curler of him.
       There was, however, ground for gossip; for Thrums folk seldom
       called in a doctor until it was too late to cure them, and McQueen
       was not the man to pay social visits. Of his skill we knew
       fearsome stories, as that, by looking at Archie Allardyce, who had
       come to broken bones on a ladder, he discovered which rung Archie
       fell from. When he entered a stuffy room he would poke his staff
       through the window to let in fresh air, and then fling down a
       shilling to pay for the breakage. He was deaf in the right ear,
       and therefore usually took the left side of prosy people, thus, as
       he explained, making a blessing of an affliction. "A pity I don't
       hear better?" I have heard him say. "Not at all. If my misfortune,
       as you call it, were to be removed, you can't conceive how I
       should miss my deaf ear." He was a fine fellow, though brusque,
       and I never saw him without his pipe until two days before we
       buried him, which was five-and-twenty years ago come Martinmas.
       "We're all quite weel," Jean said apprehensively as she answered
       his knock on the manse door, and she tried to be pleasant, too,
       for well she knew that, if a doctor willed it, she could have
       fever in five minutes.
       "Ay, Jean, I'll soon alter that," he replied ferociously. "Is the
       master in?"
       "He's at his sermon," Jean said with importance.
       To interrupt the minister at such a moment seemed sacrilege to
       her, for her up-bringing had been good. Her mother had once
       fainted in the church, but though the family's distress was great,
       they neither bore her out, nor signed to the kirk-officer to bring
       water. They propped her up in the pew in a respectful attitude,
       joining in the singing meanwhile, and she recovered in time to
       look up 2nd Chronicles, 21st and 7th.
       "Tell him I want to speak to him at the door," said the doctor
       fiercely, "or I'll bleed you this minute."
       McQueen would not enter, because his horse might have seized the
       opportunity to return stablewards. At the houses where it was
       accustomed to stop, it drew up of its own accord, knowing where
       the Doctor's "cases" were as well as himself, but it resented new
       patients.
       "You like misery, I think, Mr. Dishart," McQueen said when Gavin
       came to him, "at least I am always finding you in the thick of it,
       and that is why I am here now. I have a rare job for you if you
       will jump into the machine. You know Nanny Webster, who lives on
       the edge of Windyghoul? No, you don't, for she belongs to the
       other kirk. Well, at all events, you knew her brother, Sanders,
       the mole-catcher?"
       "I remember him. You mean the man who boasted so much about seeing
       a ball at Lord Rintoul's place?"
       "'The same, and, as you may know, his boasting about maltreating
       policemen whom he never saw led to his being sentenced to nine
       months in gaol lately."
       "That is the man," said Gavin. "I never liked him."
       "No, but his sister did," McQueen answered, drily, "and with
       reason, for he was her breadwinner, and now she is starving."
       "Anything I can give her--"
       "Would be too little, sir."
       "But the neighbours--"
       "She has few near her, and though the Thrums poor help each other
       bravely, they are at present nigh as needy as herself. Nanny is
       coming to the poorhouse, Mr. Dishart."
       "God help her!" exclaimed Gavin.
       "Nonsense," said the doctor, trying to make himself a hard man.
       "She will be properly looked after there, and--and in time she
       will like it."
       "Don't let my mother hear you speaking of taking an old woman to
       that place," Gavin said, looking anxiously up the stair. I cannot
       pretend that Margaret never listened.
       "You all speak as if the poorhouse was a gaol," the doctor said
       testily. "But so far as Nanny is concerned, everything is
       arranged. I promised to drive her to the poorhouse to-day, and she
       is waiting for me now. Don't look at me as if I was a brute. She
       is to take some of her things with her to the poorhouse, and the
       rest is to be left until Sanders's return, when she may rejoin
       him. At least we said that to her to comfort her."
       "You want me to go with you?"
       "Yes, though I warn you it may be a distressing scene; indeed, the
       truth is that I am loth to face Nanny alone to-day. Mr. Duthie
       should have accompanied me, for the Websters are Established Kirk;
       ay, and so he would if Rashie-bog had not been bearing. A terrible
       snare this curling, Mr. Dishart"--here the doctor sighed--"I have
       known Mr. Duthie wait until midnight struck on Sabbath and then be
       off to Rashie-bog with a torch."
       "I will go with you," Gavin said, putting on his coat.
       "Jump in then. You won't smoke? I never see a respectable man not
       smoking, sir, but I feel indignant with him for such sheer waste
       of time."
       Gavin smiled at this, and Snecky Hobart, who happened to be
       keeking over the manse dyke, bore the news to the Tenements.
       "I'll no sleep the nicht," Snecky said, "for wondering what made
       the minister lauch. Ay, it would be no trifle."
       A minister, it is certain, who wore a smile on his face would
       never have been called to the Auld Licht kirk, for life is a
       wrestle with the devil, and only the frivolous think to throw him
       without taking off their coats. Yet, though Gavin's zeal was what
       the congregation reverenced, many loved him privately for his
       boyishness. He could unbend at marriages, of which he had six on
       the last day of the year, and at every one of them he joked (the
       same joke) like a layman. Some did not approve of his playing at
       the teetotum for ten minutes with Kitty Dundas's invalid son, but
       the way Kitty boasted about it would have disgusted anybody. At
       the present day there are probably a score of Gavins in Thrums,
       all called after the little minister, and there is one Gavinia,
       whom he hesitated to christen. He made humorous remarks (the same
       remark) about all these children, and his smile as he patted their
       heads was for thinking over when one's work was done for the day.
       The doctor's horse clattered up the Backwynd noisily, as if a
       minister behind made no difference to it. Instead of climbing the
       Roods, however, the nearest way to Nanny's, it went westward,
       which Gavin, in a reverie, did not notice. The truth must be told.
       The Egyptian was again in his head.
       "Have I fallen deaf in the left ear, too?" said the doctor. "I see
       your lips moving, but I don't catch a syllable."
       Gavin started, coloured, and flung the gypsy out of the trap.
       "Why are we not going up the Roods?" he asked.
       "Well," said the doctor slowly, "at the top of the Roods there is
       a stance for circuses, and this old beast of mine won't pass it.
       You know, unless you are behind in the clashes and clavers of
       Thrums, that I bought her from the manager of a travelling show.
       She was the horse ('Lightning' they called her) that galloped
       round the ring at a mile an hour, and so at the top of the Roods
       she is still unmanageable. She once dragged me to the scene of her
       former triumphs, and went revolving round it, dragging the machine
       after her."
       "If you had not explained that," said Gavin, "I might have thought
       that you wanted to pass by Rashie-bog."
       The doctor, indeed, was already standing up to catch a first
       glimpse of the curlers.
       "Well," he admitted, "I might have managed to pass the circus
       ring, though what I have told you is true. However, I have not
       come this way merely to see how the match is going. I want to
       shame Mr. Duthie for neglecting his duty. It will help me to do
       mine, for the Lord knows I am finding it hard, with the music of
       these stones in my ears."
       "I never saw it played before," Gavin said, standing up in his
       turn. "What a din they make! McQueen, I believe they are
       fighting!"
       "No, no," said the excited doctor, "they are just a bit daft.
       That's the proper spirit for the game. Look, that's the baron-
       bailie near standing on his head, and there's Mr. Duthie off his
       head a' thegither. Yon's twa weavers and a mason cursing the
       laird, and the man wi' the besom is the Master of Crumnathie."
       "A democracy, at all events," said Gavin.
       "By no means," said the doctor, "it's an aristocracy of intellect.
       Gee up, Lightning, or the frost will be gone before we are there."
       "It is my opinion, doctor," said Gavin, "that you will have bones
       to set before that game is finished. I can see nothing but legs
       now."
       "Don't say a word against curling, sir, to me," said McQueen, whom
       the sight of a game in which he must not play had turned crusty.
       "Dangerous! It's the best medicine I know of. Look at that man
       coming across the field. It is Jo Strachan. Well, sir, curling
       saved Jo's life after I had given him up. You don't believe me?
       Hie, Jo, Jo Strachan, come here and tell the minister how curling
       put you on your legs again."
       Strachan came forward, a tough, little, wizened man, with red
       flannel round his ears to keep out the cold.
       "It's gospel what the doctor says, Mr. Dishart," he declared. "Me
       and my brither Sandy was baith ill, and in the same bed, and the
       doctor had hopes o' Sandy, but nane o' me. Ay, weel, when I heard
       that, I thocht I micht as weel die on the ice as in my bed, so I
       up and on wi' my claethes. Sandy was mad at me, for he was no
       curler, and he says, 'Jo Strachan, if you gang to Rashie-bog
       you'll assuredly be brocht hame a corp.' I didna heed him, though,
       and off I gaed."
       "And I see you did not die," said Gavin.
       "Not me," answered the fish cadger, with a grin. "Na, but the joke
       o't is, it was Sandy that died."
       "Not the joke, Jo," corrected the doctor, "the moral."
       "Ay, the moral; I'm aye forgetting the word."
       McQueen, enjoying Gavin's discomfiture, turned Lightning down the
       Rashie-bog road, which would be impassable as soon as the thaw
       came. In summer Rashie-bog is several fields in which a cart does
       not sink unless it stands still, but in winter it is a loch with
       here and there a spring where dead men are said to lie, There are
       no rushes at its east end, and here the dog-cart drew up near the
       curlers, a crowd of men dancing, screaming, shaking their fists
       and sweeping, while half a hundred onlookers got in their way,
       gesticulating and advising.
       "Hold me tight," the doctor whispered to Gavin, "or I'll be
       leaving you to drive Nanny to the poorhouse by yourself."
       He had no sooner said this than he tried to jump out of the trap.
       "You donnert fule, John Robbie," he shouted to a player, "soop her
       up, man, soop her up; no, no, dinna, dinna; leave her alane.
       Bailie, leave her alane, you blazing idiot. Mr. Dishart, let me
       go; what do you mean, sir, by hanging on to my coat tails? Dang it
       all, Duthie's winning. He has it, he has it!"
       "You're to play, doctor?" some cried, running to the dog-cart. "We
       hae missed you sair."
       "Jeames, I--I--. No, I daurna."
       "Then we get our licks. I never saw the minister in sic form. We
       can do nothing against him."
       "Then," cried McQueen, "I'll play. Come what will, I'll play. Let
       go my tails, Mr. Dishart, or I'll cut them off. Duty?
       Fiddlesticks!"
       "Shame on you, sir," said Gavin; "yes, and on you others who would
       entice him from his duty."
       "Shame!" the doctor cried. "Look at Mr. Duthie. Is he ashamed? And
       yet that man has been reproving me for a twelvemonths because I've
       refused to become one of his elders. Duthie," he shouted," think
       shame of yourself for curling this day."
       Mr. Duthie had carefully turned his back to the trap, for Gavin's
       presence in it annoyed him. We seldom care to be reminded of our
       duty by seeing another do it. Now, however, he advanced to the
       dog-cart, taking the far side of Gavin.
       "Put on your coat, Mr. Duthie," said the doctor, "and come with me
       to Nanny Webster's. You promised."
       Mr. Duthie looked quizzically at Gavin, and then at the sky.
       "The thaw may come at any moment," he said.
       "I think the frost is to hold," said Gavin.
       "It may hold over to-morrow," Mr. Duthie admitted; "but to-
       morrow's the Sabbath, and so a lost day."
       "A what?" exclaimed Gavin, horrified.
       "I only mean," Mr. Duthie answered, colouring, "that we can't curl
       on the Lord's day. As for what it may be like on Monday, no one
       can say. No, doctor, I won't risk it. We're in the middle of a
       game, man."
       Gavin looked very grave.
       "I see what you are thinking, Mr. Dishart," the old minister said
       doggedly; "but then, you don't curl. You are very wise. I have
       forbidden my sons to curl."
       "Then you openly snap your fingers at your duty, Mr. Duthie?" said
       the doctor, loftily. ("You can let go my tails now, Mr. Dishart,
       for the madness has passed.")
       "None of your virtuous airs, McQueen," said Mr. Duthie, hotly.
       "What was the name of the doctor that warned women never to have
       bairns while it was hauding?"
       "And what," retorted McQueen, "was the name of the minister that
       told his session he would neither preach nor pray while the black
       frost lasted?"
       "Hoots, doctor," said Duthie, "don't lose your temper because I'm
       in such form."
       "Don't lose yours, Duthie, because I aye beat you."
       "You beat me, McQueen! Go home, sir, and don't talk havers. Who
       beat you at--"
       "Who made you sing small at--"
       "Who won--"
       "Who--"
       "Who--"
       "I'll play you on Monday for whatever you like!" shrieked the
       doctor.
       "If it holds," cried the minister, "I'll be here the whole day.
       Name the stakes yourself. A stone?"
       "No," the doctor said, "but I'll tell you what we'll play for.
       You've been dinging me doited about that eldership, and we'll play
       for't. If you win I accept office."
       "Done," said the minister, recklessly.
       The dog-cart was now turned toward Windyghoul, its driver once
       more good-humoured, but Gavin silent.
       "You would have been the better of my deaf ear just now, Mr.
       Dishart," McQueen said after the loch had been left behind. "Aye,
       and I'm thinking my pipe would soothe you. But don't take it so
       much to heart, man. I'll lick him easily. He's a decent man, the
       minister, but vain of his play, ridiculously vain. However, I
       think the sight of you, in the place that should have been his,
       has broken his nerve for this day, and our side may win yet."
       "I believe," Gavin said, with sudden enlightenment, "that you
       brought me here for that purpose."
       "Maybe," chuckled the doctor; "maybe." Then he changed the
       subject suddenly. "Mr. Dishart," he asked, "were you ever in
       love?"
       "Never!" answered Gavin violently.
       "Well, well," said the doctor, "don't terrify the horse. I have
       been in love myself. It's bad, but it's nothing to curling." _
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本书目录

Chapter I - The Love-Light
Chapter II - Runs Alongside the Making of a Minister
Chapter III - The Night-Watchers
Chapter IV - First Coming of the Egyptian Woman
Chapter V - A Warlike Chapter, Culminating in the Flouting of the Minister by the Woman
Chapter VI - In which the Soldiers Meet the Amazons of Thrums
Chapter VII - Has the Folly of Looking into a Woman's Eyes by Way of Text
Chapter VIII - 3 A.M.--Monstrous Audacity of the Woman
Chapter IX - The Woman Considered in Absence--Adventures of a Military Cloak
Chapter X - First Sermon against Women
Chapter XI - Tells in a Whisper of Man's Fall during the Curling Season
Chapter XII - Tragedy of a Mud House
Chapter XIII - Second Coming of the Egyptian Woman
Chapter XIV - The Minister Dances to the Woman's Piping
Chapter XV - The Minister Bewitched--Second Sermon against Women
Chapter XVI - Continued Misbehavior of the Egyptian Woman
Chapter XVII - Intrusion of Haggart into these Pages against the Author's Wish
Chapter XVIII - Caddam--Love Leading to a Rupture
Chapter XIX - Circumstances Leading to the First Sermon in Approval of Women
Chapter XX - End of the State of Indecision
Chapter XXI - Night--Margaret--Flashing of a Lantern
Chapter XXII - Lovers
Chapter XXIII - Contains a Birth, Which is Sufficient for One Chapter
Chapter XXIV - The New World, and the Women who may not Dwell therein
Chapter XXV - Beginning of the Twenty-four Hours
Chapter XXVI - Scene at the Spittal
Chapter XXVII - First Journey of the Dominie to Thrums during the Twenty-four Hours
Chapter XXVIII - The Hill before Darkness Fell--Scene of the Impending Catastrophe
Chapter XXIX - Story of the Egyptian
Chapter XXX - The Meeting for Rain
Chapter XXXI - Various Bodies Converging on the Hill
Chapter XXXII - Leading Swiftly to the Appalling Marriage
Chapter XXXIII - While the Ten o'Clock Bell was Ringing
Chapter XXXIV - The Great Rain
Chapter XXXV - The Glen at Break of Day
Chapter XXXVI - Story of the Dominie
Chapter XXXVII - Second Journey of the Dominie to Thrums during the Twenty-four Hours
Chapter XXXVIII - Thrums during the Twenty-four Hours--Defence of the Manse
Chapter XXXIX - How Babbie Spent the Night of August Fourth
Chapter XL - Babbie and Margaret--Defence of the Manse continued
Chapter XLI - Rintoui and Babbie--Break-down of the Defence of the Manse
Chapter XLII - Margaret, the Precentor, and God between
Chapter XLIII - Rain--Mist--The Jaws
Chapter XLIV - End of the Twenty-four Hours
Chapter XLV - Talk of a Little Maid since Grown Tall