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Old Wives’ Tale, The
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER I - REVOLUTION - PART III
Arnold Bennett
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       _ A few days later Constance was arranging the more precious of her
       wedding presents in the parlour; some had to be wrapped in tissue
       and in brown paper and then tied with string and labelled; others
       had special cases of their own, leather without and velvet within.
       Among the latter was the resplendent egg-stand holding twelve
       silver-gilt egg-cups and twelve chased spoons to match, presented
       by Aunt Harriet. In the Five Towns' phrase, 'it must have cost
       money.' Even if Mr and Mrs. Povey had ten guests or ten children,
       and all the twelve of them were simultaneously gripped by a desire
       to eat eggs at breakfast or tea--even in this remote contingency
       Aunt Harriet would have been pained to see the egg-stand in use;
       such treasures are not designed for use. The presents, few in
       number, were mainly of this character, because, owing to her
       mother's heroic cession of the entire interior, Constance already
       possessed every necessary. The fewness of the presents was
       accounted for by the fact that the wedding had been strictly
       private and had taken place at Axe. There is nothing like secrecy
       in marriage for discouraging the generous impulses of one's
       friends. It was Mrs. Baines, abetted by both the chief parties,
       who had decided that the wedding should be private and secluded.
       Sophia's wedding had been altogether too private and secluded; but
       the casting of a veil over Constance's (whose union was
       irreproachable) somehow justified, after the event, the
       circumstances of Sophia's, indicating as it did that Mrs. Baines
       believed in secret weddings on principle. In such matters Mrs.
       Baines was capable of extraordinary subtlety.
       And while Constance was thus taking her wedding presents with due
       seriousness, Maggie was cleaning the steps that led from the
       pavement of King Street to the side-door, and the door was ajar.
       It was a fine June morning.
       Suddenly, over the sound of scouring, Constance heard a dog's low
       growl and then the hoarse voice of a man:
       "Mester in, wench?"
       "Happen he is, happen he isn't," came Maggie's answer. She had no
       fancy for being called wench.
       Constance went to the door, not merely from curiosity, but from a
       feeling that her authority and her responsibilities as house-
       mistress extended to the pavement surrounding the house.
       The famous James Boon, of Buck Row, the greatest dog-fancier in
       the Five Towns, stood at the bottom of the steps: a tall, fat man,
       clad in stiff, stained brown and smoking a black clay pipe less
       than three inches long. Behind him attended two bull-dogs.
       "Morning, missis!" cried Boon, cheerfully. "I've heerd tell as th'
       mister is looking out for a dog, as you might say."
       "I don't stay here with them animals a-sniffing at me--no, that I
       don't!" observed Maggie, picking herself up.
       "Is he?" Constance hesitated. She knew that Samuel had vaguely
       referred to dogs; she had not, however, imagined that he regarded
       a dog as aught but a beautiful dream. No dog had ever put paw into
       that house, and it seemed impossible that one should ever do so.
       As for those beasts of prey on the pavement ...!
       "Ay!" said James Boon, calmly.
       "I'll tell him you're here," said Constance. "But I don't know if
       he's at liberty. He seldom is at this time of day. Maggie, you'd
       better come in."
       She went slowly to the shop, full of fear for the future.
       "Sam," she whispered to her husband, who was writing at his desk,
       "here's a man come to see you about a dog."
       Assuredly he was taken aback. Still, he behaved with much presence
       of mind.
       "Oh, about a dog! Who is it?"
       "It's that Jim Boon. He says he's heard you want one."
       The renowned name of Jim Boon gave him pause; but he had to go
       through with the affair, and he went through with it, though
       nervously. Constance followed his agitated footsteps to the side-
       door.
       "Morning, Boon."
       "Morning, master."
       They began to talk dogs, Mr Povey, for his part, with due caution.
       "Now, there's a dog!" said Boon, pointing to one of the bull-dogs,
       a miracle of splendid ugliness.
       "Yes," responded Mr. Povey, insincerely. "He is a beauty. What's
       it worth now, at a venture?"
       "I'll tak' a hundred and twenty sovereigns for her," said Boon.
       "Th' other's a bit cheaper--a hundred."
       "Oh, Sam!" gasped Constance.
       And even Mr. Povey nearly lost his nerve. "That's more than I want
       to give," said he timidly.
       "But look at her!" Boon persisted, roughly snatching up the more
       expensive animal, and displaying her cannibal teeth.
       Mr. Povey shook his head. Constance glanced away.
       "That's not quite the sort of dog I want," said Mr. Povey.
       "Fox-terrier?"
       "Yes, that's more like," Mr. Povey agreed eagerly.
       "What'll ye run to?"
       "Oh," said Mr. Povey, largely, "I don't know."
       "Will ye run to a tenner?"
       "I thought of something cheaper."
       "Well, hoo much? Out wi' it, mester."
       "Not more than two pounds," said Mr. Povey. He would have said one
       pound had he dared. The prices of dogs amazed him.
       "I thowt it was a dog as ye wanted!" said Boon. "Look 'ere,
       mester. Come up to my yard and see what I've got."
       "I will," said Mr. Povey.
       "And bring missis along too. Now, what about a cat for th' missis?
       Or a gold-fish?"
       The end of the episode was that a young lady aged some twelve
       months entered the Povey household on trial. Her exiguous legs
       twinkled all over the parlour, and she had the oddest appearance
       in the parlour. But she was so confiding, so affectionate, so
       timorous, and her black nose was so icy in that hot weather, that
       Constance loved her violently within an hour. Mr. Povey made rules
       for her. He explained to her that she must never, never go into
       the shop. But she went, and he whipped her to the squealing point,
       and Constance cried an instant, while admiring her husband's
       firmness.
       The dog was not all.
       On another day Constance, prying into the least details of the
       parlour, discovered a box of cigars inside the lid of the
       harmonium, on the keyboard. She was so unaccustomed to cigars that
       at first she did not realize what the object was. Her father had
       never smoked, nor drunk intoxicants; nor had Mr. Critchlow. Nobody
       had ever smoked in that house, where tobacco had always been
       regarded as equally licentious with cards, 'the devil's
       playthings.' Certainly Samuel had never smoked in the house,
       though the sight of the cigar-box reminded Constance of an
       occasion when her mother had announced an incredulous suspicion
       that Mr. Povey, fresh from an excursion into the world on a
       Thursday evening, 'smelt of smoke.'
       She closed the harmonium and kept silence.
       That very night, coming suddenly into the parlour, she caught
       Samuel at the harmonium. The lid went down with a resonant bang
       that awoke sympathetic vibrations in every corner of the room.
       "What is it?" Constance inquired, jumping.
       "Oh, nothing!" replied Mr. Povey, carelessly. Each was deceiving
       the other: Mr. Povey hid his crime, and Constance hid her
       knowledge of his crime. False, false! But this is what marriage
       is.
       And the next day Constance had a visit in the shop from a possible
       new servant, recommended to her by Mr. Holl, the grocer.
       "Will you please step this way?" said Constance, with affable
       primness, steeped in the novel sense of what it is to be the sole
       responsible mistress of a vast household. She preceded the girl to
       the parlour, and as they passed the open door of Mr. Povey's
       cutting-out room, Constance had the clear vision and titillating
       odour of her husband smoking a cigar. He was in his shirt-sleeves,
       calmly cutting out, and Fan (the lady companion), at watch on the
       bench, yapped at the possible new servant.
       "I think I shall try that girl," said she to Samuel at tea. She
       said nothing as to the cigar; nor did he.
       On the following evening, after supper, Mr. Povey burst out:
       "I think I'll have a weed! You didn't know I smoked, did you?"
       Thus Mr. Povey came out in his true colours as a blood, a blade,
       and a gay spark.
       But dogs and cigars, disconcerting enough in their degree, were to
       the signboard, when the signboard at last came, as skim milk is to
       hot brandy. It was the signboard that, more startlingly than
       anything else, marked the dawn of a new era in St. Luke's Square.
       Four men spent a day and a half in fixing it; they had ladders,
       ropes, and pulleys, and two of them dined on the flat lead roof of
       the projecting shop-windows. The signboard was thirty-five feet
       long and two feet in depth; over its centre was a semicircle about
       three feet in radius; this semicircle bore the legend, judiciously
       disposed, "S. Povey. Late." All the sign-board proper was devoted
       to the words, "John Baines," in gold letters a foot and a half
       high, on a green ground.
       The Square watched and wondered; and murmured: "Well, bless us!
       What next?"
       It was agreed that in giving paramount importance to the name of
       his late father-in-law, Mr. Povey had displayed a very nice
       feeling.
       Some asked with glee: "What'll the old lady have to say?"
       Constance asked herself this, but not with glee. When Constance
       walked down the Square homewards, she could scarcely bear to look
       at the sign; the thought of what her mother might say frightened
       her. Her mother's first visit of state was imminent, and Aunt
       Harriet was to accompany her. Constance felt almost sick as the
       day approached. When she faintly hinted her apprehensions to
       Samuel, he demanded, as if surprised--
       "Haven't you mentioned it in one of your letters?"
       "Oh NO!"
       "If that's all," said he, with bravado, "I'll write and tell her
       myself." _
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Preface
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 1. The Square - Part 1
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 1. The Square - Part 2
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 1. The Square - Part 3
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 2. The Tooth - Part 1
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 2. The Tooth - Part 2
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 2. The Tooth - Part 3
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 3. A Battle - Part 1
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 3. A Battle - Part 2
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 3. A Battle - Part 3
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 3. A Battle - Part 4
Book 1. Mrs. Baines - Chapter 3. A Battle - Part 5
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER IV - ELEPHANT - PART I
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER IV - ELEPHANT - PART II
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER IV - ELEPHANT - PART III
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER IV - ELEPHANT - PART IV
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER V - THE TRAVELLER - PART I
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER V - THE TRAVELLER - PART II
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER V - THE TRAVELLER - PART III
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER V - THE TRAVELLER - PART IV
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER VI - ESCAPADE - PART I
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER VI - ESCAPADE - PART II
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER VI - ESCAPADE - PART III
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER VI - ESCAPADE - PART IV
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER VII - A DEFEAT - PART I
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER VII - A DEFEAT - PART II
BOOK I MRS. BAINES - CHAPTER VII - A DEFEAT - PART III
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER I - REVOLUTION - PART I
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER I - REVOLUTION - PART II
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER I - REVOLUTION - PART III
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER I - REVOLUTION - PART IV
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER II - CHRISTMAS AND THE FUTURE - PART I
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER II - CHRISTMAS AND THE FUTURE - PART II
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER II - CHRISTMAS AND THE FUTURE - PART III
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER II - CHRISTMAS AND THE FUTURE - PART IV
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER III - CYRIL - PART I
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER III - CYRIL - PART II
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER IV - CRIME - PART I
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER IV - CRIME - PART II
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER IV - CRIME - PART III
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER V - ANOTHER CRIME - PART I
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER V - ANOTHER CRIME - PART II
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER V - ANOTHER CRIME - PART III
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER V - ANOTHER CRIME - PART IV
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER V - ANOTHER CRIME - PART V
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER VI - THE WIDOW - PART I
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER VI - THE WIDOW - PART II
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER VI - THE WIDOW - PART III
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER VII - BRICKS AND MORTAR - PART I
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER VII - BRICKS AND MORTAR - PART II
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER VII - BRICKS AND MORTAR - PART III
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER VIII - THE PROUDEST MOTHER - PART I
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER VIII - THE PROUDEST MOTHER - PART II
BOOK II CONSTANCE - CHAPTER VIII - THE PROUDEST MOTHER - PART III
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER I - THE ELOPEMENT - PART I
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER I - THE ELOPEMENT - PART II
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER II - SUPPER - PART I
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER II - SUPPER - PART II
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER III - AN AMBITION SATISFIED - PART I
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER III - AN AMBITION SATISFIED - PART II
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER III - AN AMBITION SATISFIED - PART III
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER III - AN AMBITION SATISFIED - PART IV
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER IV - A CRISIS FOR GERALD - PART I
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER IV - A CRISIS FOR GERALD - PART II
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER IV - A CRISIS FOR GERALD - PART III
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER IV - A CRISIS FOR GERALD - PART IV
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER IV - A CRISIS FOR GERALD - PART V
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER V - FEVER - PART I
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER V - FEVER - PART II
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER V - FEVER - PART III
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER V - FEVER - PART IV
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER V - FEVER - PART V
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER VI - THE SIEGE - PART I
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER VI - THE SIEGE - PART II
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER VI - THE SIEGE - PART III
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER VI - THE SIEGE - PART IV
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER VI - THE SIEGE - PART V
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER VII - SUCCESS - PART I
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER VII - SUCCESS - PART II
BOOK III SOPHIA - CHAPTER VII - SUCCESS - PART III
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER I - FRENSHAM'S - PART I
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER I - FRENSHAM'S - PART II
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER I - FRENSHAM'S - PART III
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER I - FRENSHAM'S - PART IV
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER I - FRENSHAM'S - PART V
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER II THE MEETING - PART I
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER II THE MEETING - PART II
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER II THE MEETING - PART III
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER III TOWARDS HOTEL LIFE - PART I
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER III TOWARDS HOTEL LIFE - PART II
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER III TOWARDS HOTEL LIFE - PART III
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER III TOWARDS HOTEL LIFE - PART IV
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER III TOWARDS HOTEL LIFE - PART V
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER III TOWARDS HOTEL LIFE - PART VI
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER IV END OF SOPHIA - PART I
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER IV END OF SOPHIA - PART II
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER IV END OF SOPHIA - PART III
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER IV END OF SOPHIA - PART IV
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER V - END OF CONSTANCE - PART I
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER V - END OF CONSTANCE - PART II
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER V - END OF CONSTANCE - PART III
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER V - END OF CONSTANCE - PART IV
BOOK IV WHAT LIFE IS - CHAPTER V - END OF CONSTANCE - PART V