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Essay(s) by (Edgar W. Nye) Bill Nye
The Duke Of Rawhide
(Edgar W.Nye) Bill Nye
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       "I believe I've got about the most instinct bulldog in the United States," said Cayote Van Gobb yesterday. "Other pups may show cuteness and cunning, you know, but my dog, the Duke of Rawhide Buttes, is not only generally smart, but he keeps up with the times. He's not only a talented cuss, but his genius is always fresh and original."
       "What are some of his specialties, Van?" said I.
       "Oh, there's a good many of 'em, fust and last. He never seems to be content with the achievements that please other dogs. You watch him and you'll see that his mind is active all the time. When he is still he's working up some scheme or another, that he will ripen and fructify later on.
       "For three year's I've had a watermelon patch and run it with more or less success, I reckon. The Duke has tended to 'em after they got ripe, and I was going to say that it kept his hands pretty busy to do it, but, to be more accurate, I should say that it kept his mouth full. Hardly a night after the melons got ripe and in the dark of the moon, but the Dude would sample a cowboy or a sheep-herder from the lower Poudre. Watermelons were generally worth ten cents a pound along the Union Pacific for the first two weeks, and a fifty-pounder was worth $5. That made it an object to keep your melons, for in a good year you could grow enough on ten acres to pay off the national debt.
       "Well, to return to my subject. Duke would sleep days during the season and gather fragments of the rear breadths of Western pantaloons at night. One morning Duke had a piece of fancy cassimere in his teeth that I tried to pry out and preserve, so that I could identify the owner, perhaps, but he wouldn't give it up. I coaxed him and lammed him across the face and eyes with an old board, but he wouldn't give it to me. Then I watched him. I've been watchin' him ever since. He took all these fragments of goods I found, over into the garret above the carriage shed.
       "Yesterday I went in there and took a lantern with me. There on the floor the Duke of Rawhide had arranged all the samples of Rocky Mountain pantaloons with a good deal of taste, and I don't suppose you'd believe it, but that blamed pup is collecting all these little scraps to make himself a crazy quilt.
       "You can talk about instinct in animals, but, so far as the Duke of Rawhide Buttes is concerned, it seems to me more like all-wool genius a yard wide."
       [The end]
       (Edgar W. Nye) Bill Nye's essay: Duke Of Rawhide
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"Done It A-Purpose"
"Heap Brain"
"I Spy"
"We"
About Geology
About Portraits
Absent Minded
Accepting The Laramie Postoffice
All About Menials
All About Oratory
Along Lake Superior
The Amateur Carpenter
Anatomy
Anecdotes Of Justice
Anecdotes Of The Stage
Answering An Invitation
Answers To Correspondents
The Approaching Humorist
The Arabian Language
Archimedes
Arnold Winkelreid
Asking For A Pass
The Average Hen
B. Franklin, Deceased
Biography Of Spartacus
The Bite Of A Mad Dog
The Blase Young Man
The Board Of Trade
Boston Common And Environs
A Bright Future For Pugilism
Broncho Sam
Bunker Hill
A Calm
Care Of House Plants
Catching A Buffalo
Causes For Thanksgiving
The Cell Nest
The Chinese God
Chinese Justice
Christopher Columbus
The Church Debt
A Circular
A Collection Of Keys
Come Back
Concerning Book Publishing
Concerning Coroners
A Convention
The Cow-Boy
The Crops
Crowns And Crowned Heads
Daniel Webster
Dessicated Mule
Dogs And Dog Days
Doosedly Dilatory
Down East Rum
Dr. Dizart's Dog
Drunk In A Plug Hat
The Duke Of Rawhide
Early Day Justice
Eccentricities Of Genius
Eccentricity In Lunch
Etiquette At Hotels
Every Man His Own Paper-Hanger
The Expensive Word
Extracts From A Queen's Diary
Farming In Maine
A Father's Advice To His Son
A Father's Letter
Favored A Higher Fine
Fifteen Years Apart
Flying Machines
General Sheridan's Horse
George The Third
A Goat In A Frame
Great Sacrifice Of Bric-A-Brac
A Great Spiritualist
A Great Upheaval
Habits Of A Literary Man
The Heyday Of Life
History Of Babylon
The Holy Terror
Hours With Great Men
How Evolution Evolves
I Tried Milling
In Washington
The Indian Orator
Insomnia In Domestic Animals
John Adams
John Adams' Diary
A Journalistic Tenderfoot
Knights Of The Pen
Letter From New York
A Letter Of Regrets
Letter To A Communist
Life Insurance As A Health Restorer
Literary Freaks
The Little Barefoot Boy
Lost Money
Lovely Horrors
A Lumber Camp
Man Overbored
Mark Anthony
Milling In Pompeii
The Miner At Home
Modern Architecture
More Paternal Correspondence
A Mountain Snowstorm
Mr. Sweeney's Cat
Murray And The Mormons
Mush And Melody
My Dog
My Experience As An Agriculturist
My Lecture Abroad
My Mine
My Physician
My School Days
Nero
A New Autograph Album
A New Play
The Newspaper
No More Frontier
The Old South
The Old Subscriber
On Cyclones
One Kind Of Fool
An Operatic Entertainment
The Opium Habit
Our Forefathers
Parental Advice
A Peaceable Man
Petticoats At The Polls
The Photograph Habit
Picnic Incidents
A Picturesque Picnic
Plato
Polygamy As A Religious Duty
The Poor Blind Pig
A Powerful Speech
Preventing A Scandal
Railway Etiquette
Recollections Of Noah Webster
A Resign
Rev. Mr. Hallelujah's Hoss
Roller Skating
Rosalinde
Second Letter To The President
The Sedentary Hen
She Kind Of Coaxed Him
Shorts
The Silver Dollar
Sixty Minutes In America
Skimming The Milky Way
The Snake Indian
Somnambulism And Crime
A Spencerian Ass
Spinal Meningitis
Spring
Squaw Jim
Squaw Jim's Religion
Stirring Incidents At A Fire
The Story Of A Struggler
Strabusmus And Justice
Street Cars And Curiosities
Taxidermy
They Fell
A Thrilling Experience
Time's Changes
To A Married Man
To An Embryo Poet
To Her Majesty
To The President-Elect
Two Ways Of Telling It
Twombley's Tale
Venice
Verona
The Wail Of A Wife
A Wallula Night
The Warrior's Oration
The Ways Of Doctors
The Weeping Woman
What We Eat
The Wild Cow
Woman's Wonderful Influence
Woodtick William's Story
Words About Washington
Wrestling With The Mazy
You Heah Me, Sah!