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Essay(s) by (Edgar W. Nye) Bill Nye
Somnambulism And Crime
(Edgar W.Nye) Bill Nye
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       A recent article in the London Post on the subject of somnambulism, calls to my mind several little incidents with somnambulistic tendencies in my own experience.
       This subject has, indeed, attracted my attention for some years, and it has afforded me great pleasure to investigate it carefully.
       Regarding the causes of dreams and somnambulism, there are many theories, all of which are more or less untenable. My own idea, given, of course, in a plain, crude way, is that thoughts originate on the inside of the brain and then go at once to the surface, where they have their photographs taken, with the understanding that the negatives are to be preserved. In this way the thought may afterward be duplicated back to the thinker in the form of a dream, and, if the impulse be strong enough, muscular action and somnambulism may result.
       On the banks of Bitter Creek, some years ago, lived an open-mouthed man, who had risen from affluence by his unaided effort until he was entirely free from any incumbrance in the way of property. His mind dwelt on this matter a great deal during the day. Thoughts of manual labor flitted through his mind, but were cast aside as impracticable. Then other means of acquiring property suggested themselves. These thoughts were photographed on the delicate negative of the brain, where it is a rule to preserve all negatives. At night these thoughts were reversed within the think resort, if I may be allowed that term, and muscular action resulted. Yielding at last to the great desire for possessions and property the somnambulist groped his way to the corral of a total stranger, and selecting a choice mule with great dewy eyes and real camel's hair tail, he fled. On and on he pressed, toward the dark, uncertain west, till at last rosy morn clomb the low, outlying hills and gilded the gray outlines of the sage-brush. The coyote slunk back to his home, but the somnambulist did not.
       He awoke as day dawned, and, when he found himself astride the mule of another, a slight shudder passed the entire length of his frame. He then fully realized that he had made his debut as a somnambulist. He seemed to think that he who starts out to be a somnambulist should never turn back. So he pressed on, while the red sun stepped out into the awful quiet of the dusty waste and gradually moved up into the sky, and slowly added another day to those already filed away in the dark maw of ages.
       Night came again at last, and with it other somnambulists similar to the first, only that they were riding on their own beasts. Some somnambulists ride their own animals, while others are content to bestride the steeds of strangers.
       The man on the anonymous mule halted at last at the mouth of a deep canon. He did so at the request of other somnambulists. Mechanically he got down from the back of the mule and stood under a stunted mountain pine.
       After awhile he began to ascend the tree by means of his neck. When he had reached the lower branch of the tree he made a few gestures with his feet by a lateral movement of the legs. He made several ineffectual efforts to kick some pieces out of the horizon, and then, after he had gently oscilliated a few times, he assumed a pendent and perpendicular position at right angles with the limb of the tree.
       The other somnambulists then took the mule safely back to his corral, and the tragedy of a night was over.
       The London Post very truly says that where somnambulism can be proved it is a good defense in a criminal action. It was so held in this case.
       Various methods are suggested for rousing the somnambulist, such as tickling the feet, for instance; but in all my own experience, I never knew of a more radical or permanent cure than the one so imperfectly given above. It might do in some cases to tickle the feet of a somnambulist discovered in the act of riding away on an anonymous mule, but how could you successfully tickle the soles of his feet while he is standing on them? In such cases, the only true way would be to suspend the somnambulist in such a way as to give free access to the feet from below, and, at the same time, give him a good, wide horizon to kick at.
       [The end]
       (Edgar W. Nye) Bill Nye's essay: Somnambulism And Crime
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"Done It A-Purpose"
"Heap Brain"
"I Spy"
"We"
About Geology
About Portraits
Absent Minded
Accepting The Laramie Postoffice
All About Menials
All About Oratory
Along Lake Superior
The Amateur Carpenter
Anatomy
Anecdotes Of Justice
Anecdotes Of The Stage
Answering An Invitation
Answers To Correspondents
The Approaching Humorist
The Arabian Language
Archimedes
Arnold Winkelreid
Asking For A Pass
The Average Hen
B. Franklin, Deceased
Biography Of Spartacus
The Bite Of A Mad Dog
The Blase Young Man
The Board Of Trade
Boston Common And Environs
A Bright Future For Pugilism
Broncho Sam
Bunker Hill
A Calm
Care Of House Plants
Catching A Buffalo
Causes For Thanksgiving
The Cell Nest
The Chinese God
Chinese Justice
Christopher Columbus
The Church Debt
A Circular
A Collection Of Keys
Come Back
Concerning Book Publishing
Concerning Coroners
A Convention
The Cow-Boy
The Crops
Crowns And Crowned Heads
Daniel Webster
Dessicated Mule
Dogs And Dog Days
Doosedly Dilatory
Down East Rum
Dr. Dizart's Dog
Drunk In A Plug Hat
The Duke Of Rawhide
Early Day Justice
Eccentricities Of Genius
Eccentricity In Lunch
Etiquette At Hotels
Every Man His Own Paper-Hanger
The Expensive Word
Extracts From A Queen's Diary
Farming In Maine
A Father's Advice To His Son
A Father's Letter
Favored A Higher Fine
Fifteen Years Apart
Flying Machines
General Sheridan's Horse
George The Third
A Goat In A Frame
Great Sacrifice Of Bric-A-Brac
A Great Spiritualist
A Great Upheaval
Habits Of A Literary Man
The Heyday Of Life
History Of Babylon
The Holy Terror
Hours With Great Men
How Evolution Evolves
I Tried Milling
In Washington
The Indian Orator
Insomnia In Domestic Animals
John Adams
John Adams' Diary
A Journalistic Tenderfoot
Knights Of The Pen
Letter From New York
A Letter Of Regrets
Letter To A Communist
Life Insurance As A Health Restorer
Literary Freaks
The Little Barefoot Boy
Lost Money
Lovely Horrors
A Lumber Camp
Man Overbored
Mark Anthony
Milling In Pompeii
The Miner At Home
Modern Architecture
More Paternal Correspondence
A Mountain Snowstorm
Mr. Sweeney's Cat
Murray And The Mormons
Mush And Melody
My Dog
My Experience As An Agriculturist
My Lecture Abroad
My Mine
My Physician
My School Days
Nero
A New Autograph Album
A New Play
The Newspaper
No More Frontier
The Old South
The Old Subscriber
On Cyclones
One Kind Of Fool
An Operatic Entertainment
The Opium Habit
Our Forefathers
Parental Advice
A Peaceable Man
Petticoats At The Polls
The Photograph Habit
Picnic Incidents
A Picturesque Picnic
Plato
Polygamy As A Religious Duty
The Poor Blind Pig
A Powerful Speech
Preventing A Scandal
Railway Etiquette
Recollections Of Noah Webster
A Resign
Rev. Mr. Hallelujah's Hoss
Roller Skating
Rosalinde
Second Letter To The President
The Sedentary Hen
She Kind Of Coaxed Him
Shorts
The Silver Dollar
Sixty Minutes In America
Skimming The Milky Way
The Snake Indian
Somnambulism And Crime
A Spencerian Ass
Spinal Meningitis
Spring
Squaw Jim
Squaw Jim's Religion
Stirring Incidents At A Fire
The Story Of A Struggler
Strabusmus And Justice
Street Cars And Curiosities
Taxidermy
They Fell
A Thrilling Experience
Time's Changes
To A Married Man
To An Embryo Poet
To Her Majesty
To The President-Elect
Two Ways Of Telling It
Twombley's Tale
Venice
Verona
The Wail Of A Wife
A Wallula Night
The Warrior's Oration
The Ways Of Doctors
The Weeping Woman
What We Eat
The Wild Cow
Woman's Wonderful Influence
Woodtick William's Story
Words About Washington
Wrestling With The Mazy
You Heah Me, Sah!