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Chicot the Jester
Chapter 28. How Brother Gorenflot Traveled Upon An Ass...
Alexandre Dumas
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       _ CHAPTER XXVIII. HOW BROTHER GORENFLOT TRAVELED UPON AN ASS, NAMED PANURGE, AND LEARNED MANY THINGS HE DID NOT KNOW BEFORE
       What made Chicot so indifferent to his own repast was, that he had already breakfasted plentifully. Therefore, he sat Gorenflot down to eggs and bacon, while he went among the peasants to look for an ass. He found a pacific creature, four years old, and something between an ass and a horse; gave twenty-two livres for it, and brought it to Gorenflot, who was enchanted at the sight of it, and christened it Panurge. Chicot, seeing by the look of the table that there would be no cruelty in staying his companion's repast, said,--
       "Come, now we must go on; at Melun we will lunch."
       Gorenflot got up, merely saying, "At Melun, at Melun."
       They went on for about four leagues, then Gorenflot lay down on the grass to sleep, while Chicot began to calculate.
       "One hundred and twenty leagues, at ten leagues a day, would take twelve days." It was as much as he could reasonably expect from the combined forces of a monk and an ass. But Chicot shook his head. "It will not do," he said, "if he wants to follow me, he must do fifteen."
       He pushed the monk to wake him, who, opening his eyes, said, "Are we at Melun? I am hungry."
       "Not yet, compere, and that is why I woke you; we must get on; we go too slow, ventre de biche!"
       "Oh, no, dear M. Chicot; it is so fatiguing to go fast. Besides, there is no hurry: am I not traveling for the propagation of the faith, and you for pleasure? Well, the slower we go, the better the faith will be propagated, and the more you will amuse yourself. My advice is to stay some days at Melun, where they make excellent eel-pies. What do you say, M. Chicot?"
       "I say, that my opinion is to go as fast as possible; not to lunch at Melun, but only to sup at Monterau, to make up for lost time."
       Gorenflot looked at his companion as if he did not understand.
       "Come, let us get on," said Chicot.
       The monk sat still and groaned.
       "If you wish to stay behind and travel at your ease, you are welcome."
       "No, no!" cried Gorenflot, in terror; "no, no, M. Chicot; I love you too much to leave you!"
       "Then to your saddle at once."
       Gorenflot got on his ass this time sideways, as a lady sits, saying it was more comfortable; but the fact was that, fearing they were to go faster, he wished to be able to hold on both by mane and tail.
       Chicot began to trot, and the ass followed. The first moments were terrible for Gorenflot, but he managed to keep his seat. From time to time Chicot stood up in his stirrups and looked forward, then, not seeing what he looked for, redoubled his speed.
       "What are you looking for, dear M. Chicot?"
       "Nothing; but we are not getting on."
       "Not getting on! we are trotting all the way."
       "Gallop then!" and he began to canter.
       Panurge again followed; Gorenflot was in agonies.
       "Oh, M. Chicot!" said he, as soon as he could speak, "do you call this traveling for pleasure? It does not amuse me at all."
       "On! on!"
       "It is dreadful!"
       "Stay behind then!"
       "Panurge can do no more; he is stopping."
       "Then adieu, compere!"
       Gorenflot felt half inclined to reply in the same manner, but he remembered that the horse, whom he felt ready to curse, bore on his back a man with a hundred and fifty pistoles in his pocket, so he resigned himself, and beat his ass to make him gallop once more.
       "I shall kill my poor Panurge!" cried he dolefully, thinking to move Chicot.
       "Well, kill him," said Chicot quietly, "and we will buy another."
       All at once Chicot, on arriving at the top of a hill, reined in his horse suddenly. But the ass, having once taken it into his head to gallop, was not so easily stopped, and Gorenflot was forced to let himself slide off and hang on to the donkey with all his weight before he could stop him.
       "Ah, M. Chicot!" cried he, "what does it all mean? First we must gallop fit to break our necks, and then we must stop short here!"
       Chicot had hidden himself behind a rock, and was eagerly watching three men who, about two hundred yards in advance, were traveling on quietly on their mules, and he did not reply.
       "I am tired and hungry!" continued Gorenflot angrily.
       "And so am I," said Chicot; "and at the first hotel we come to we will order a couple of fricasseed chickens, some ham, and a jug of their best wine."
       "Really, is it true this time?"
       "I promise you, compere."
       "Well, then, let us go and seek it. Come, Panurge, you shall have some dinner."
       Chicot remounted his horse, and Gorenflot led his ass. The much-desired inn soon appeared, but, to the surprise of Gorenflot, Chicot caused him to make a detour and pass round the back. At the front door were standing the three travelers. _
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本书目录

Chapter 1. The Wedding Of St. Luc
Chapter 2. How It Is Not Always He Who Opens The Door, Who Enters The House
Chapter 3. How It Is Sometimes Difficult To Distinguish A Dream From The Reality
Chapter 4. How Madame De St. Luc Had Passed The Night
Chapter 5. How Madame De St. Luc Passed The Second Night Of Her Marriage
Chapter 6. Le Petit Coucher Of Henri III
Chapter 7. How, Without Any One Knowing Why, The King Was Converted...
Chapter 8. How The King Was Afraid Of Being Afraid
Chapter 9. How The Angel Made A Mistake And Spoke To Chicot...
Chapter 10. How Bussy Went To Seek For The Reality Of His Dream
Chapter 11. M. Bryan De Monsoreau
Chapter 12. How Bussy Found Both The Portrait And The Original
Chapter 13. Who Diana Was
Chapter 14. The Treaty
Chapter 15. The Marriage
Chapter 16. The Marriage
Chapter 17. How Henri III Traveled...
Chapter 18. Brother Gorenflot
Chapter 19. How Chicot Found Out That It Was Easier To Go In Than Out Of The Abbey
Chapter 20. How Chicot, Forced To Remain In The Abbey...
Chapter 21. How Chicot Learned Genealogy
Chapter 22. How M. And Madame De St. Luc Met With A Traveling Companion
Chapter 23. The Old Man
Chapter 24. How Remy-Le-Haudouin Had...
Chapter 25. The Father And Daughter
Chapter 26. How Brother Gorenflot Awoke, And The Reception He Met With At His Convent
Chapter 27. How Brother Gorenflot Remained Convinced...
Chapter 28. How Brother Gorenflot Traveled Upon An Ass...
Chapter 29. How Brother Gorenflot Changed His Ass For A Mule...
Chapter 30. How Chicot And His Companion Installed Themselves At The Hotel...
Chapter 31. How The Monk Confessed The Advocate...
Chapter 32. How Chicot Used His Sword
Chapter 33. How The Duc D'anjou Learned That Diana Was Not Dead
Chapter 34. How Chicot Returned To The Louvre...
Chapter 35. What Passed Between M. De Monsoreau And The Duke
Chapter 36. Chicot And The King
Chapter 37. What M. De Guise Came To Do At The Louvre
Chapter 38. Castor And Pollux
Chapter 39. Which It Is Proved That Listening Is The Best Way To Hear
Chapter 40. The Evening Of The League
Chapter 41. The Rue De La Ferronnerie
Chapter 42. The Prince And The Friend
Chapter 43. Etymology Of The Rue De La Jussienne
Chapter 44. How D'epernon Had His Doublet Torn...
Chapter 45. Chicot More Than Ever King Of France
Chapter 46. How Chicot Paid A Visit To Bussy, And What Followed
Chapter 47. The Chess Of M. Chicot, And The Cup And Ball Of M. Quelus
Chapter 48. The Reception Of The Chiefs Of The League
Chapter 49. How The King N Axed...
Chapter 50. Eteocles And Polynices
Chapter 51. How People Do Not Always Lose Their Time By Searching Empty Drawers
Chapter 52. Ventre St. Gris
Chapter 53. The Friends
Chapter 54. Bussy And Diana
Chapter 55. How Bussy Was Offered Three Hundred Pistoles For His Horse...
Chapter 56. The Diplomacy Of The Duc D'anjou
Chapter 57. The Ideas Of The Duc D'anjou
Chapter 58. A Flight Of Angevins
Chapter 59. Roland
Chapter 60. What M. De Monsoreau Came To Announce
Chapter 61. How The King Learned The Flight Of His Beloved Brother...
Chapter 62. How, As Chicot And The Queen Mother Were Agreed...
Chapter 63. In Which It Is Proved That Gratitude Was One Of St. Luc's Virtues
Chapter 64. The Project Of M. De St. Luc
Chapter 65. How M. De St. Luc Showed M. De Monsoreau The Thrust...
Chapter 66. In Which We See The Queen-Mother...
Chapter 67. Little Causes And Great Effects
Chapter 68. How M. De Monsoreau Opened And Shut His Eyes...
Chapter 69. How M. Le Duc D'anjou Went To Meridor...
Chapter 70. The Inconvenience Of Large Litters And Narrow Doors
Chapter 71. What Temper The King Was In When St. Luc Reappeared At The Louvre
Chapter 72. In Which We Meet Two Important Personages...
Chapter 73. Diana's Second Journey To Paris
Chapter 74. How The Ambassador Of The Duc D'anjou Arrived At The Louvre...
Chapter 75. Which Is Only The End Of The Preceding One
Chapter 76. How M. De St. Luc Acquitted Himself...
Chapter 77. In What Respect M. De St. Luc Was More Civilized...
Chapter 78. The Precautions Of M. De Monsoreau
Chapter 79. A Visit To The House At Les Tournelles
Chapter 80. The Watchers
Chapter 81. How M. Le Duc D'anjou Signed, And After Having Signed, Spoke
Chapter 82. A Promenade At The Tournelles
Chapter 83. In Which Chicot Sleeps
Chapter 84. Where Chicot Wakes
Chapter 85. The Fete Dieu
Chapter 86. Which Will Elucidate The Previous Chapter
Chapter 87. The Procession
Chapter 88. Chicot The First
Chapter 89. Interest And Capital
Chapter 90. What Was Passing Near The Bastile...
Chapter 91. The Assassination
Chapter 92. How Brother Gorenflot Found Himself More...
Chapter 93. Where Chicot Guesses Why D'epernon Had Blood On His Feet...
Chapter 94. The Morning Of The Combat
Chapter 95. The Friends Of Bussy
Chapter 96. The Combat
Chapter 97. The End