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Ben Hur: A Tale of the Christ
BOOK VI   BOOK VI - CHAPTER IV
Lew Wallace
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       _ It was dark when, parting with the drover inside the gate,
       Ben-Hur turned into a narrow lane leading to the south. A few of
       the people whom he met saluted him. The bouldering of the pavement
       was rough. The houses on both sides were low, dark, and cheerless;
       the doors all closed: from the roofs, occasionally, he heard women
       crooning to children. The loneliness of his situation, the night,
       the uncertainty cloaking the object of his coming, all affected
       him cheerlessly. With feelings sinking lower and lower, he came
       directly to the deep reservoir now known as the Pool of Bethesda,
       in which the water reflected the over-pending sky. Looking up,
       he beheld the northern wall of the Tower of Antonia, a black
       frowning heap reared into the dim steel-gray sky. He halted as
       if challenged by a threatening sentinel.
       The Tower stood up so high, and seemed so vast, resting apparently
       upon foundations so sure, that he was constrained to acknowledge its
       strength. If his mother were there in living burial, what could he do
       for her? By the strong hand, nothing. An army might beat the stony
       face with ballista and ram, and be laughed at. Against him alone,
       the gigantic southeast turret looked down in the self-containment
       of a hill. And he thought, cunning is so easily baffled; and God,
       always the last resort of the helpless--God is sometimes so slow
       to act!
       In doubt and misgiving, he turned into the street in front of the
       Tower, and followed it slowly on to the west.
       Over in Bezetha he knew there was a khan, where it was his intention
       to seek lodging while in the city; but just now he could not resist
       the impulse to go home. His heart drew him that way.
       The old formal salutation which he received from the few people
       who passed him had never sounded so pleasantly. Presently, all the
       eastern sky began to silver and shine, and objects before invisible
       in the west--chiefly the tall towers on Mount Zion--emerged as from
       a shadowy depth, and put on spectral distinctness, floating, as it
       were, above the yawning blackness of the valley below, very castles
       in the air.
       He came, at length, to his father's house.
       Of those who read this page, some there will be to divine his
       feelings without prompting. They are such as had happy homes in
       their youth, no matter how far that may have been back in time--homes
       which are now the starting-points of all recollection; paradises from
       which they went forth in tears, and which they would now return to,
       if they could, as little children; places of laughter and singing,
       and associations dearer than any or all the triumphs of after-life.
       At the gate on the north side of the old house Ben-Hur stopped.
       In the corners the wax used in the sealing-up was still plainly
       seen, and across the valves was the board with the inscription--
       "THIS IS THE PROPERTY OF
       THE EMPEROR."
       Nobody had gone in or out the gate since the dreadful day of the
       separation. Should he knock as of old? It was useless, he knew;
       yet he could not resist the temptation. Amrah might hear, and look
       out of one of the windows on that side. Taking a stone, he mounted
       the broad stone step, and tapped three times. A dull echo replied.
       He tried again, louder than before; and again, pausing each time to
       listen. The silence was mocking. Retiring into the street, he watched
       the windows; but they, too, were lifeless. The parapet on the roof
       was defined sharply against the brightening sky; nothing could have
       stirred upon it unseen by him, and nothing did stir.
       From the north side he passed to the west, where there were four
       windows which he watched long and anxiously, but with as little
       effect. At times his heart swelled with impotent wishes; at others,
       he trembled at the deceptions of his own fancy. Amrah made no
       sign--not even a ghost stirred.
       Silently, then, he stole round to the south. There, too, the gate
       was sealed and inscribed. The mellow splendor of the August moon,
       pouring over the crest of Olivet, since termed the Mount of Offence,
       brought the lettering boldly out; and he read, and was filled with
       rage. All he could do was to wrench the board from its nailing, and
       hurl it into the ditch. Then he sat upon the step, and prayed for
       the New King, and that his coming might be hastened. As his blood
       cooled, insensibly he yielded to the fatigue of long travel in the
       summer heat, and sank down lower, and, at last, slept.
       About that time two women came down the street from the direction
       of the Tower of Antonia, approaching the palace of the Hurs. They
       advanced stealthily, with timid steps, pausing often to listen.
       At the corner of the rugged pile, one said to the other, in a
       low voice,
       "This is it, Tirzah!"
       And Tirzah, after a look, caught her mother's hand, and leaned
       upon her heavily, sobbing, but silent.
       "Let us go on, my child, because"--the mother hesitated and trembled;
       then, with an effort to be calm, continued--"because when morning
       comes they will put us out of the gate of the city to--return no
       more."
       Tirzah sank almost to the stones.
       "Ah, yes!" she said, between sobs; "I forgot. I had the feeling
       of going home. But we are lepers, and have no homes; we belong
       to the dead!"
       The mother stooped and raised her tenderly, saying, "We have
       nothing to fear. Let us go on."
       Indeed, lifting their empty hands, they could have run upon a
       legion and put it to flight.
       And, creeping in close to the rough wall, they glided on, like two
       ghosts, till they came to the gate, before which they also paused.
       Seeing the board, they stepped upon the stone in the scarce cold
       tracks of Ben-Hur, and read the inscription--"This is the Property
       of the Emperor."
       Then the mother clasped her hands, and, with upraised eyes,
       moaned in unutterable anguish.
       "What now, mother? You scare me!"
       And the answer was, presently, "Oh, Tirzah, the poor are dead! He
       is dead!"
       "Who, mother?"
       "Your brother! They took everything from him--everything--even
       this house!"
       "Poor!" said Tirzah, vacantly.
       "He will never be able to help us."
       "And then, mother?"
       "To-morrow--to-morrow, my child, we must find a seat by the wayside,
       and beg alms as the lepers do; beg, or--"
       Tirzah leaned upon her again, and said, whispering, "Let us--let
       us die!"
       "No!" the mother said, firmly. "The Lord has appointed our times,
       and we are believers in the Lord. We will wait on him even in this.
       Come away!"
       She caught Tirzah's hand as she spoke, and hastened to the west
       corner of the house, keeping close to the wall. No one being in
       sight there, they kept on to the next corner, and shrank from
       the moonlight, which lay exceedingly bright over the whole south
       front, and along a part of the street. The mother's will was
       strong. Casting one look back and up to the windows on the west
       side, she stepped out into the light, drawing Tirzah after her;
       and the extent of their amiction was then to be seen--on their
       lips and cheeks, in their bleared eyes, in their cracked hands;
       especially in the long, snaky locks, stiff with loathsome ichor,
       and, like their eyebrows, ghastly white. Nor was it possible to
       have told which was mother, which daughter; both alike seemed
       witch-like old.
       "Hist!" said the mother. "There is some one lying upon the step--a
       man. Let us go round him."
       They crossed to the opposite side of the street quickly, and,
       in the shade there, moved on till before the gate, where they
       stopped.
       "He is asleep, Tirzah!"
       The man was very still.
       "Stay here, and I will try the gate."
       So saying, the mother stole noiselessly across, and ventured to
       touch the wicket; she never knew if it yielded, for that moment
       the man sighed, and, turning restlessly, shifted the handkerchief
       on his head in such manner that the face was left upturned and
       fair in the broad moonlight. She looked down at it and started;
       then looked again, stooping a little, and arose and clasped her
       hands and raised her eyes to heaven in mute appeal. An instant so,
       and she ran back to Tirzah.
       "As the Lord liveth, the man is my son--thy brother!" she said,
       in an awe-inspiring whisper.
       "My brother?--Judah?"
       The mother caught her hand eagerly.
       "Come!" she said, in the same enforced whisper, "let us look at
       him together--once more--only once--then help thou thy servants,
       Lord!"
       They crossed the street hand in hand ghostly-quick, ghostly-still.
       When their shadows fell upon him, they stopped. One of his hands was
       lying out upon the step palm up. Tirzah fell upon her knees, and would
       have kissed it; but the mother drew her back.
       "Not for thy life; not for thy life! Unclean, unclean!" she whispered.
       Tirzah shrank from him, as if he were the leprous one.
       Ben-Hur was handsome as the manly are. His cheeks and forehead
       were swarthy from exposure to the desert sun and air; yet under
       the light mustache the lips were red, and the teeth shone white,
       and the soft beard did not hide the full roundness of chin and
       throat. How beautiful he appeared to the mother's eyes! How mightily
       she yearned to put her arms about him, and take his head upon her
       bosom and kiss him, as had been her wont in his happy childhood!
       Where got she the strength to resist the impulse? From her love,
       O, reader!--her mother-love, which, if thou wilt observe well,
       hath this unlikeness to any other love: tender to the object,
       it can be infinitely tyrannical to itself, and thence all its
       power of self-sacrifice. Not for restoration to health and fortune,
       not for any blessing of life, not for life itself, would she have
       left her leprous kiss upon his cheek! Yet touch him she must;
       in that instant of finding him she must renounce him forever!
       How bitter, bitter hard it was, let some other mother say! She
       knelt down, and, crawling to his feet, touched the sole of one
       of his sandals with her lips, yellow though it was with the dust
       of the street--and touched it again and again; and her very soul
       was in the kisses.
       He stirred, and tossed his hand. They moved back, but heard him
       mutter in his dream,
       "Mother! Amrah! Where is--"
       He fell off into the deep sleep.
       Tirzah stared wistfully. The mother put her face in the dust,
       struggling to suppress a sob so deep and strong it seemed her
       heart was bursting. Almost she wished he might waken.
       He had asked for her; she was not forgotten; in his sleep he was
       thinking of her. Was it not enough?
       Presently mother beckoned to Tirzah, and they arose, and taking
       one more look, as if to print his image past fading, hand in
       hand they recrossed the street. Back in the shade of the wall
       there, they retired and knelt, looking at him, waiting for him
       to wake--waiting some revelation, they knew not what. Nobody has
       yet given us a measure for the patience of a love like theirs.
       By-and-by, the sleep being yet upon him, another woman appeared at
       the corner of the palace. The two in the shade saw her plainly in
       the light; a small figure, much bent, dark-skinned, gray-haired,
       dressed neatly in servant's garb, and carrying a basket full of
       vegetables.
       At sight of the man upon the step the new-comer stopped; then,
       as if decided, she walked on--very lightly as she drew near the
       sleeper. Passing round him, she went to the gate, slid the wicket
       latch easily to one side, and put her hand in the opening. One of
       the broad boards in the left valve swung ajar without noise.
       She put the basket through, and was about to follow, when,
       yielding to curiosity, she lingered to have one look at the
       stranger whose face was below her in open view.
       The spectators across the street heard a low exclamation, and saw
       the woman rub her eyes as if to renew their power, bend closer down,
       clasp her hands, gaze wildly around, look at the sleeper, stoop and
       raise the outlying hand, and kiss it fondly--that which they wished
       so mightily to do, but dared not.
       Awakened by the action, Ben-Hur instinctively withdrew the hand;
       as he did so, his eyes met the woman's.
       "Amrah! O Amrah, is it thou?" he said.
       The good heart made no answer in words, but fell upon his neck,
       crying for joy.
       Gently he put her arms away, and lifting the dark face wet with
       tears, kissed it, his joy only a little less than hers. Then those
       across the way heard him say,
       "Mother--Tirzah--O Amrah, tell me of them! Speak, speak, I pray
       thee!"
       Amrah only cried afresh.
       "Thou has seen them, Amrah. Thou knowest where they are; tell me
       they are at home."
       Tirzah moved, but her mother, divining her purpose, caught her
       and whispered, "Do not go--not for life. Unclean, unclean!"
       Her love was in tyrannical mood. Though both their hearts broke, he
       should not become what they were; and she conquered.
       Meantime, Amrah, so entreated, only wept the more.
       "Wert thou going in?" he asked, presently, seeing the board swung
       back. "Come, then. I will go with thee." He arose as he spoke.
       "The Romans--be the curse of the Lord upon them!--the Romans lied.
       The house is mine. Rise, Amrah, and let us go in." A moment and
       they were gone, leaving the two in the shade to behold the gate
       staring blankly at them--the gate which they might not ever enter
       more. They nestled together in the dust.
       They had done their duty.
       Their love was proven.
       Next morning they were found, and driven out the city with stones.
       "Begone! Ye are of the dead; go to the dead!"
       With the doom ringing in their ears, they went forth. _
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BOOK I
   BOOK I - CHAPTER I
   BOOK I - CHAPTER II
   BOOK I - CHAPTER III
   BOOK I - CHAPTER IV
   BOOK I - CHAPTER V
   BOOK I - CHAPTER VI
   BOOK I - CHAPTER VII
   BOOK I - CHAPTER VIII
   BOOK I - CHAPTER IX
   BOOK I - CHAPTER X
   BOOK I - CHAPTER XI
   BOOK I - CHAPTER XII
   BOOK I - CHAPTER XIII
   BOOK I - CHAPTER XIV
BOOK II
   BOOK II - CHAPTER I
   BOOK II - CHAPTER II
   BOOK II - CHAPTER III
   BOOK II - CHAPTER IV
   BOOK II - CHAPTER V
   BOOK II - CHAPTER VI
   BOOK II - CHAPTER VII
BOOK III
   BOOK III - CHAPTER I
   BOOK III - CHAPTER II
   BOOK III - CHAPTER III
   BOOK III - CHAPTER IV
   BOOK III - CHAPTER V
   BOOK III - CHAPTER VI
BOOK IV
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER I
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER II
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER III
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER IV
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER V
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER VI
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER VII
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER VIII
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER IX
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER X
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER XI
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER XII
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER XIII
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER XIV
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER XV
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER XVI
   BOOK IV - CHAPTER XVII
BOOK V
   BOOK V - CHAPTER I
   BOOK V - CHAPTER II
   BOOK V - CHAPTER III
   BOOK V - CHAPTER IV
   BOOK V - CHAPTER V
   BOOK V - CHAPTER VI
   BOOK V - CHAPTER VII
   BOOK V - CHAPTER VIII
   BOOK V - CHAPTER IX
   BOOK V - CHAPTER X
   BOOK V - CHAPTER XI
   BOOK V - CHAPTER XII
   BOOK V - CHAPTER XIII
   BOOK V - CHAPTER XIV
   BOOK V - CHAPTER XV
   BOOK V - CHAPTER XVI
BOOK VI
   BOOK VI - CHAPTER I
   BOOK VI - CHAPTER II
   BOOK VI - CHAPTER III
   BOOK VI - CHAPTER IV
   BOOK VI - CHAPTER V
   BOOK VI - CHAPTER VI
BOOK VII
   BOOK VII - CHAPTER I
   BOOK VII - CHAPTER II
   BOOK VII - CHAPTER III
   BOOK VII - CHAPTER IV
   BOOK VII - CHAPTER V
BOOK VIII
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER I
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER II
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER III
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER IV
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER V
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER VI
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER VII
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER VIII
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER IX
   BOOK VIII - CHAPTER X