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Prisoner in Fairyland, A
CHAPTER XXVII
Algernon Blackwood
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       _ _Asia_. ... I feel, I see
       Those eyes which burn through smiles that fade in tears,
       Like stars half quenched in mists of silver dew.
       Prometheus Unbound, SHELLEY.
       It was only ten o'clock, really, and the curfew was ringing from every
       village on the mountain-side. The sound of the bells, half musical,
       half ominous, was borne by the bise across the vineyards, for the
       easterly wind that brings fine weather was blowing over lake and
       forest, and seemed to drive before it thin sheets of moonlight that
       turned the whole world soft. The village lay cosily dreaming beneath
       the sky. Once the curfew died away there was only the rustling of the
       plane trees in the old courtyard. The great Citadelle loomed above the
       smaller houses, half in shadow half in silver, nodding heavily to the
       spire of the Church, and well within sight of the sentinelle poplar
       that guarded the village from the forest and the mountains. Far away,
       these mountains now lowered their enormous shoulders to let night flow
       down upon the sleeping world. The Scaffolding that brought it had long
       since sailed over France towards the sea....
       Mother, still panting from the ritual of fastening the younger
       children into bed, had gone a moment down the passage to say good-
       night to Mlle. Lemaire, and when she returned, the three of them--
       herself, her husband, and Cousin Henry--dropped into chairs beside the
       window and watched the silvery world in silence for a time. None felt
       inclined to speak. There was drama somehow in that interval of
       silence--that drama which lurks everywhere and always behind life's
       commonest, most ordinary moments. Actions reveal it--sometimes--but it
       mostly lies concealed, and especially in deep silences like this, when
       the ticking of a cuckoo clock upon the wall may be the sole hint of
       its presence.
       It was not the good-byes that made all three realise it so near,
       though good-byes are always solemn and momentous things; it was
       something that stirred and rose upon them from a far deeper strata of
       emotion than that caused by apparent separation. For no pain lay in
       it, but a power much more difficult to express in the sounds and
       syllables of speech--Joy. A great joy, creative and of big
       significance, had known accomplishment. Each felt it, knew it,
       realised it. The moonlit night was aware of it. The entire universe
       knew it, too. The drama lay in that. There had been creation--of more
       light.... The world was richer than it had been. Some one had caught
       Beauty in a net, and to catch Beauty is to transform and recreate all
       common things. It is revelation.
       Through the mind of each of these three flowed the stream of casual
       thinking--images, reflections, and the shadowy scaffoldings of many
       new emotions--sweeping along between the banks of speech and silence.
       And this stream, though in flood, did not overflow into words for a
       long time. With eyes turned inwards, each watched the current pass.
       Clear and deep, it quietly reflected--stars. Each watched the same
       stream, the same calm depths, the same delicate reflections. They were
       in harmony with themselves, and therefore with the universe....
       Then, suddenly, one of the reflections--it was the Pleiades--rose to
       the surface to clasp its lovely original. It was the woman who netted
       the golden thought and drew it forth for all to see.
       'Couldn't you read it to us, Daddy?' she whispered softly across the
       silence.
       'If it's not too long for you.' He was so eager, so willing to comply.
       'We will listen till the Morning Spiders take us home,' his cousin
       said.
       'It's only the shorter version,' Daddy agreed shiningly, 'a sketch for
       the book which, of course, will take a year to write. I might read
       _that_, perhaps.'
       'Do,' urged Mother. 'We are all in it, aren't we? It's our story as
       well as yours.'
       He rose to get the portfolio from the shelf where he had laid it, and
       while Rogers lit the lamp, Riquette stole in at the window, picking
       her way daintily across the wet tiles. She stood a moment, silhouetted
       against the sky; then shaking her feet rapidly each in turn like bits
       of quivering wire, she stepped precisely into the room. 'I am in it
       too,' she plainly said, curling herself up on the chair Daddy had just
       vacated, but resigning herself placidly enough to his scanty lap when
       he came back again and began to read. Her deep purring, while he
       stroked her absent-mindedly, became an undercurrent in the sound of
       his voice, then presently ceased altogether....
       On and on he read, while the moon sailed over La Citadelle, bidding
       the stars hush to listen too. She put her silvery soft hands across
       their eyes that they might hear the better. The blue wind of night
       gathered up the meaning and spread it everywhere. The forest caught
       the tale from the low laughter in the crest of the poplar, and passed
       it on to the leagues of forest that bore it in turn across the
       frontiers into France. Thence snowy Altels and the giant Blumlisalp
       flashed it south along the crowding peaks and down among the Italian
       chestnut woods, who next sent it coursing over the rustling waves of
       the Adriatic and mixed it everywhere with the Mediterranean foam. In
       the morning the shadows upon bare Grecian hills would whisper it among
       the ancient islands, and the East catch echoes of it in the winds of
       dawn. The forests of the North would open their great gloomy eyes with
       wonder, as though strange new wild-flowers had come among them in the
       night. All across the world, indeed, wherever there were gardened
       minds tender enough to grow fairy seed, these flakes of thought would
       settle down in sleep, and blossom in due season into a crop of magic
       beauty.
       He read on and on.... The village listened too, the little shadowy
       street, the familiar pine woods, the troubled Pension, each, as its
       image was evoked in the story, knew its soul discovered, and stirred
       in its sleep towards the little room to hear. And the desolate ridges
       of La Tourne and Boudry, the clefts where the wild lily of the valley
       grew unknown, high nooks and corners where the buzzards nested, these
       also knew and answered to the trumpet summons of the Thought that made
       them live. A fire of creation ran pulsing from this centre. All were
       in the Pattern of the Story.
       To the two human listeners it seemed as familiar as a tale read, in
       childhood long ago, and only half forgotten. They always knew a little
       of what was coming next. Yet it spread so much further than mere
       childhood memories, for its golden atmosphere included all countries
       and all times. It rose and sang and sparkled, lighting up strange deep
       recesses of their unconscious and half-realised life, and almost
       revealing the tiny silver links that joined them on to the universe at
       large. The golden ladders from the Milky Way were all let down. They
       climbed up silvery ropes into the Moon....
       'It's not my own idea,' he said; 'I'm convinced of that. It's all
       flocked into me from some other mind that thought it long ago, but
       could not write it, perhaps. No thought is lost, you see--never can be
       lost. Like this, somehow, I feel it:--
       Now sinks to sleep the clamour of the day,
       And, million-footed, from the Milky Way,
       Falls shyly on my heart the world's lost Thought--
       Shower of primrose dust the stars have taught
       To haunt each sleeping mind,
       Till it may find
       A garden in some eager, passionate brain
       That, rich in loving-kindness as in pain,
       Shall harvest it, then scatter forth again
       It's garnered loveliness from heaven caught.
       Oh, every yearning thought that holds a tear,
       Yet finds no mission,
       And lies untold,
       Waits, guarded in that labyrinth of gold,--
       To reappear
       Upon some perfect night,
       Deathless--not old--
       But sweet with time and distance,
       And clothed as in a vision
       Of starry brilliance
       For the world's delight.'
       In the pauses, from time to time, they heard the distant thunder of
       the Areuse as it churned and tumbled over the Val de Travers boulders.
       The Colombier bells, as the hours passed, strung the sentences
       together; moonlight wove in and out of every adventure as they
       listened; stars threaded little chapters each to each with their
       eternal golden fastenings. The words seemed written down in dew, but
       the dew crystallised into fairy patterns that instantly flew about the
       world upon their mission of deliverance. In this ancient Network of
       the Stars the universe lay fluttering; and they lay with it, all
       prisoners in Fairyland.
       For the key of it all was sympathy, and the' delicate soul of it was
       tender human love. Bourcelles, in this magic tale, was the starting-
       point whence the Starlight Expresses flashed into all the world, even
       unto unvisited, forgotten corners that had known no service hitherto.
       It was so adaptable and searching, and knew such tiny, secret ways of
       entrance. The thought was so penetrating, true, and simple. Even old
       Mother Plume would wake to the recovery of some hitherto forgotten
       fragrance in her daily life... just as those Northern forests would
       wake to find new wild-flowers. For all fairytales issue first from the
       primeval forest, thence undergoing their protean transformation; and
       in similar fashion this story, so slight but so tremendous, issued
       from the forest of one man's underthinking--one deep, pure mind,
       wumbled badly as far as external things were concerned, yet realising
       that Bourcelles contained the Universe, and that he, in turn contained
       Bourcelles. Another, it is true, had shown it to him, though all
       unwittingly, and had cleaned in his atmosphere the channels for the
       entrance of the glorious pattern. But the result was the same. In his
       brain--perhaps by Chance, perhaps by God--lay the machinery which
       enabled him to give it out to others--the power and ability to
       transmit. It was a fairy-tale of the world, only the world had
       forgotten it. He brought back its fairyland again.
       And this fairyland, what and where was it? And how could this tale of
       its recovery bring into his listeners' hearts such a sense of peace
       and joy that they felt suddenly secure in the world and safe mid all
       the confusion of their muddled lives? That there were tears in
       Mother's eyes seems beyond question, because the moonlight, reflected
       faintly from a wet cobble in the yard below, glistened like a tiny
       silver lantern there. They betrayed the fact that something in her had
       melted and flowed free. Yet there was no sadness in the fairy-tale to
       cause it; they were tears of joy.
       Surely it was that this tale of Starlight, Starlight Expresses and
       Star Caves, told as simply as running water, revealed the entire
       Universe--as One, and that in this mighty, splendid thing each of them
       nested safe and comfortable. The world was really _thinking_, and all
       lay fluttering in the grand, magnificent old Net of Stars. What people
       think, they are. All can think Beauty. And sympathy--to feel with
       everything--was the clue; for sympathy is love, and to love a star was
       to love a neighbour. To be without sympathy was to feel apart, and to
       think apart was to cut oneself off from life, from the Whole, from God
       and joy--it was Death. To work at commonplace duties because they were
       duties to the Universe at large, this was the way to find courage,
       peace, and happiness, because this was genuine and successful work, no
       effort lost, and the most distant star aware of it. Thinking was
       living, whether material results were visible or not; yearning was
       action, even though no accomplishment was apparent; thought and
       sympathy, though felt but for a passing moment, sweetened the Pleiades
       and flashed along the Milky Way, and so-called tangible results that
       could prove it to the senses provided no adequate test of
       accomplishment or success. In the knowledge of belonging to this vast
       underlying unity was the liberation that brings courage, carelessness,
       and joy, and to admit failure in anything, by thinking it, was to
       weaken the entire structure which binds together the planets and the
       heart of a boy. Thoughts were the fairies that the world believed in
       when it was younger, simpler, less involved in separation; and the
       golden Fairyland recovered in this story was the Fairyland of lovely
       thinking....
       In this little lamp-lit room of the Citadelle, the two listeners were
       conscious of this giant, delicate network that captured every flying
       thought and carried it streaming through the world. God became a
       simple thing: He fashioned Rogers's Scheme, even though it never
       materialised in bricks and mortar. God was behind Mother, even when
       she knitted or lit the fire in the Den. All were prisoners in His
       eternal Fairyland....
       And the symbolism of the story, the so-called fantasy, they also
       easily understood, because they felt it true. To be 'out' of the body
       was merely to think and feel away from self. As they listened they
       realised themselves in touch with every nation and with every time,
       with all possible beliefs and disbeliefs, with every conceivable kind
       of thinking, that is, which ever has existed or ever shall exist....
       The heat and radiance given out by the clear delivery of this
       'inspirational' fairy-tale must have been very strong; far-reaching it
       certainly was....
       'Ah!' sighed Rogers to himself, 'if only I could be like that!' not
       realising that he was so.
       'Oh dear!' felt the Woman, 'that's what I've felt sometimes. I only
       wish it were true of me!' unaware that it could be, and even by the
       fact of her yearning, _was_ so.
       'If only I could get up and help the world!' passed like a flame
       across the heart of the sufferer who lay on her sleepless bed next
       door, listening to the sound of the droning voice that reached her
       through the wall, yet curiously ignorant that this very longing was
       already majestically effective in the world of definite action.
       And even Mother Plume, pacing her airless room at the further end of
       the village and tapping her ebony stick upon the floor, turned
       suspiciously, as at a passing flash of light that warmed her for a
       sudden instant as it went.
       'Perhaps, after all, they don't mean all these unkind things they do
       to me!' she thought; 'I live so much alone. Possibly I see things less
       clearly than I used to do!'
       The spell was certainly very potent, though Daddy himself, reading out
       the little shining chapters, guessed as little as the rest of them how
       strong. So small a part of what he meant to say, it seemed, had been
       transferred to the paper. More than he realised, far, far more, lay
       between the lines, of course. There was conviction in it, because
       there was vision and belief. Not much was said when he put his roll
       of paper down and leaned back in his chair. Riquette opened her eyes
       and blinked narrowly, then closed them again and began to purr. The
       ticking of the cuckoo clock seemed suddenly very loud and noticeable.
       'Thank you,' said Mother quietly in an uncertain kind of voice. 'The
       world seems very wonderful now--quite different.'
       She moved in her chair--the first movement she had made for over two
       hours. Daddy rubbed his eyes, stroked his beard, and lit a cigarette;
       it went out almost immediately, but he puffed on at it just the same,
       till his cousin struck a match and stood over him to see it properly
       alight.
       'You have caught Beauty naked in your net of stars,' he murmured; 'but
       you have left her as you found her--shining, silvery, unclothed.
       Others will see her, too. You have taken us all back into Fairyland,
       and I, for one, shall never get out again.'
       'Nor I,' breathed some one in the shadows by the window....
       The clock struck two. 'Odd,' said Mother, softly, 'but I never heard
       it strike once while you were reading!'
       'We've all been out,' Rogers laughed significantly, 'just as you make
       them get out in the story'; and then, while Riquette yawned and turned
       a moment from the window-sill to say thank you for her long, warm
       sleep, Mother lit the spirit-lamp and brewed the cups of chocolate.
       She tiptoed in next door, and as she entered the sick-room she saw
       through the steam rising from the cup she carried a curious thing--an
       impression of brilliance about the bed, as though shafts of light
       issued from it. Rays pulsed and trembled in the air. There was a
       perfume of flowers. It seemed she stepped back into the atmosphere of
       the story for an instant.
       'Ah, you're not asleep,' she whispered. 'We've brewed some chocolate,
       and I thought you might like a cup.'
       'No, I'm not asleep,' answered the other woman from the bed she never
       would leave until she was carried from it, 'but I have been dreaming.
       It seemed the stars came down into my room and sang to me; this bed
       became a throne; and some power was in me by which I could send my
       thoughts out to help the world. I sent them out as a king sends
       messengers--to people everywhere--even to people I've never heard of.
       Isn't it wonderful?'
       'You've had no pain?' For Mother knew that these sleepless hours at
       night brought usually intense suffering. She stared at her, noting how
       the eyes shone and glistened with unshed moisture.
       'None,' was the answer, 'but only the greatest joy and peace I've ever
       known.' The little glass of _calmant_ was untouched; it was not a drug
       that had soothed the exhausted nerves. In this room at any rate the
       spell was working still. 'I was carried through the air by stars, as
       though my ceaseless yearning to get up and work in the world for once
       was realised.'
       'You can do everything from your bed,' her friend murmured, sitting
       down beside her. 'You do. Your thoughts go out so strongly. I've often
       felt them myself. Perhaps that's why God put you here in bed like
       this,' she added, surprised at the power in herself that made her say
       such things--'just to think and pray for the world.'
       'I do pray sometimes for others,' the tortured woman answered
       modestly, 'but this time I was not conscious of praying at all. It all
       swept out of me of its own accord. The force in me seemed so free and
       inexhaustible that it overflowed. It was irresistible. I felt able to
       save the world.'
       'You were out,' said Mother softly, 'out of yourself, I mean,' she
       corrected it. 'And your lovely thoughts go everywhere. You do save the
       world.'
       There fell a long silence then between them.
       'You've been reading aloud,' Mlle. Lemaire said presently. 'I heard
       the drone of the voice through the wall---'
       'Daddy was reading his new story to us,' the other said. 'It didn't
       disturb you?'
       'On the contrary. I think it was the voice somehow that brought the
       vision. I listened vaguely at first, trying to sleep; then, opening my
       eyes suddenly, the room, as I told you, was full of stars. Their rays
       caught hold of me and drew these forces out of my very heart. I
       yielded, giving and giving and giving ... such life flowed from me,
       and they carried it away in streams.... Oh, it was really like a
       divine sensation.' 'It was divine,' said Mother, but whether she meant
       the story or her friend's experience, she hardly knew herself.
       'And the story--was it not about our little Bourcelles?' asked the
       other.
       Mother held her hands up as though words failed her. She opened her
       arms wide. She was not quite sure of her voice.
       'It was,' she said at length, 'but Bourcelles had grown into the
       universe. It's a fairy-tale, but it's like a great golden fire. It
       warmed my heart till my whole body seemed all heart, and I didn't know
       whether to laugh or cry. It makes you see that the whole world is
       _one_, and that the sun and moon and stars lie in so small and
       unimportant a thing as, say, Jimbo's mischief, or Monkey's impudence,
       or Jinny's backwardness and absurdity. All are in sympathy together,
       as in a network, and to feel sympathy with anything, even the most
       insignificant, connects you instantly with the Whole. Thought and
       sympathy _are_ the Universe--they are life.'
       While Mother paused for breath, her old friend smiled a curious,
       meaning smile, as though she heard a thing that she had always known.
       'And all of us are in the story, and all the things we _think_ are
       alive and active too, because we have created them. Our thoughts
       populate the world, flying everywhere to help or hinder others, you
       see.'
       The sound of a door opening was heard. Mother got up to go. Shafts of
       light again seemed to follow her from the figure in the bed.
       'Good-night,' she whispered with a full heart, while her thought ran
       suddenly--'You possess the secret of life and of creation, for
       suffering has taught it to you, and you have really known it always.
       But Daddy has put it into words for everybody.' She felt proud as a
       queen.
       There were whispered good-nights then in the corridor, for Rogers and
       her husband were on their way home to bed.
       'Your chocolate is getting cold,' said Daddy kindly.
       'We thought you would probably stay in there. We're going over now.
       It's very late,' Rogers added. They said good-night again.
       She closed and locked the great door of the Citadelle behind them,
       hearing their steps upon the cobbles in the yard, and for some time
       afterwards upon the road. But their going away seemed the same as
       coming nearer. She felt so close to everything that lived. Everything
       did live. Her heart included all that existed, that ever had existed,
       that ever could exist. Mother was alive all over. 'I have just been
       created,' she laughed, and went back into the Den to drink her cup of
       tepid chocolate. _