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Peregrine’s Progress
Book 1. The Silent Places   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 33. Of Two Incomparable Things. The Voice Of Diana And Jessamy's "Right"
Jeffery Farnol
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       _ BOOK I. THE SILENT PLACES
       CHAPTER XXXIII. OF TWO INCOMPARABLE THINGS. THE VOICE OF DIANA AND JESSAMY'S "RIGHT"
       Exuberant, with blood a-dance and nerves braced and tingling from the sparkling water, we faced each other upon the grassy level, Jessamy and I, stripped to the waist and with muffled fists and I very conscious of the keen eyes that appraised my slender arms, and the muscles of what uncle George would have called my 'torso.'
       "I'm afraid I am--hatefully puny!" I exclaimed, casting a disparaging glance at my proportions.
       "Smallish," nodded Jessamy, "smallish, but that ain't a matter to weep over, brother. Small muscles is quicker than big. Moreover, the Lord has given you a sound and healthy body and left you to develop an' do the best wi' it. Fresh air an' exercise, sledge 'ammer an' bellers'll work wonders in a week or so, mark my words. Now come on an' keep your weather peeper on my right, for look'ee your left is a feeler, good to keep your man away, to jolt him now an' then an' to feint him to an opening, then it's in wi' your right an' all o' you behind it--that's my way and I've found it a pretty good way."
       "You've always won your fights, haven't you, Jessamy?"
       "Pretty often--though 'tis all vanity, lad, arter all--"
       "And why did you win--and often against bigger and stronger men?"
       "Well, p'raps because I eat little an' drink less, or p'raps because I meant to win, or p'raps again because I knew how. However, the fightin' game is all vanity an' vexation an' keep your ogles on my right! Now, into me, lad, an' hit hard--that's your fashion--try for my chin but don't forget my right! Swing in for my ribs, Perry--and heartily! Steady boy--on your toes now!"
       Such were his expressions as we danced and ducked, feinted and smote, and as often as he bade me watch his right, that same right smacked home upon my ribs or face while I wasted myself in futile yet exceedingly earnest efforts to smite in turn his ever-moving body or elusive, wagging head, what time over and under and through my guard shot his terrible fists, to tap me lightly here, to pat me there until my breath grew short. And now, while I stood to get my wind, he explained how it was done, showing me sudden volts and turns and shifts which he termed foot-work. He showed me how to drive in short-arm blows, swinging from the hips, and how to evade them; how, when occasion favoured, to hit from the shoulder with all my strength and weight behind the blow, and how to meet a ducking head with what he called an uppercut, just such a terrible stroke as had caused the downfall of the big man Tom.
       Thus Jessamy alternately smote and lectured me until, warned by Diana's clear call, we donned shirts and waistcoats and strode away to breakfast.
       "And how's he shaping, Jessamy?" enquired the Tinker, serving out ham, pink and savoury, from the hissing frying pan, while Diana poured out the coffee.
       "None s' bad," answered Jessamy; "he's quick an' willing an' don't mind bein' knocked down now and then, which is a good thing--you went down pretty frequent that last round, brother!" Here Diana, noting my battered dishevelment, scowled at Jessamy adorably.
       "It ain't--isn't needful to hit quite so hard, is it, Jessamy?" she enquired.
       "Why, yes, Ann. Peregrine wants me to teach him to fight an' you can't teach that to any man by tapping him, d'ye see."
       "But, then, Jessamy," said the Tinker, with his twinkling, bright eyes on Diana, "Peregrine ain't exactly a Milo o' Crete as had a habit o' slayin' oxen wi' a blow of his fist; Peregrine's delicate frame could never endoor real good, hard knocks--"
       "But it could, Jerry!" exclaimed Diana. "Nobody could hit him harder than I've seen him hit, except Jessamy, p'raps." Now at this I was seized of such a yearning to kiss her that I bent lower over my platter lest the impulse prove ungovernable.
       "It ain't size as counts, brother," added Jessamy, "no--not once in a thousand; an' as for this cove Milo, big an' heavy an' slow as a waggon o' bricks, I could eat him alive any day. Though to be sure 't would only be vanity an' vexation arter all," he added mournfully, "so let's talk o' better things."
       "Why, then, Jessamy," said the Tinker, his eyes twinkling more than usual, "what might be the pre-cise time by your chronometer?"
       "It is now," replied Jessamy, solemnly consulting his watch, "exactly five an' three quarter minutes to seven, Jerry."
       "Then I take leave to tell ye, you're exactly two minutes an' a half slow," retorted the Tinker, glancing at his own.
       "You're very silent, Peregrine; does aught grieve ye?" enquired the Tinker.
       "Did I shake ye up a bit too much, brother?" enquired Jessamy anxiously.
       "No, no, indeed," I answered, "it is only that I am a--a little thoughtful this morning."
       And so, in a while, breakfast being done, Jessamy rose.
       "An' now for another go at Old Nick!" quoth he.
       "Where are ye for to-day?" questioned the Tinker.
       "Tonbridge--'tis market day an' Nick'll be busy in every tavern an' inn, as usual. What'll I bring back for supper?"
       "Well, a chicken's tasty," mused the Tinker, "but then so's lamb, or there's liver an' bacon--"
       "A shin o' beef!" said Diana in voice of finality.
       "Stooed!" nodded the Tinker. "Stooed wi' plenty o' vegetables. A shin o' beef or say a couple--oh, prime! An' it's my turn to pay, Jessamy."
       "No, it's mine!" quoth Diana.
       "Pray allow me!" said I, reaching for my purse.
       "Lord bless us, we're all that rich!" laughed Jessamy. "Come, let's toss for it." The which we did and the lot fell to Jessamy. "A couple o' shins o' beef, loaves an' what vegetables?"
       "Get some of all sorts!" nodded the Tinker.
       "We've plenty o' potatoes an' onions!" said Diana. "And bring 'em as early as possible, Jess; a shin o' beef ought to simmer for hours."
       "Cheerily it is, Ann!" and catching up the canvas bag, Jessamy flourished his hat and strode off.
       "How does Jessamy contrive to live?" I enquired.
       "Lord, Peregrine," answered the Tinker, "Jessamy's rich--or was--made a fortun' wi' his fists, though I reckon he's give most of it away, like the tender-hearted cove he is."
       And now, while Diana busied herself in matters culinary, Jeremy and I lighted the forge and got us to work. And very often above the ring and clamour of our hammers would rise the wonder of her voice singing some wild air of the Zingari or plaintive old ballad; so often and so gloriously she sang that at last, as I blew the fire for another heat, Jeremy bade me hush, and silent thus we stood to hearken.
       "Peregrine," said he at last, "I knew Ann's voice was a wonder, but I never heard her sing so blithe an' happy-'earted. I wonder why?"
       "Perhaps it is this wonderful morning," said I, watching the flutter of her gown amid the thickets across the little glade.
       "Aye, most likely, for 't is surely a day o' glory, lad, a glory as is a-shining at me this moment out o' your eyes, Peregrine, singing in your voice--"
       "Jeremy," said I, reaching out to grasp his grimy hand, "O Jeremy, you are right. Love found me in the dawn and this morning Diana promised to be my--wife. God make me worthy!"
       "Amen, lad, amen!" said the Tinker.
       And then from the shade of the willows that bordered the stream limped the small and shabby yet stately form of Lord Wyvelstoke. _
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Ante Scriptum
Book 1. The Silent Places
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 1. Introducing Myself
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 2. Tells How And Why I Set Forth Upon The Quest In Question
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 3. Wherein The Reader Shall Find Some Description Of An Extraordinary Tinker
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 4. In Which I Meet A Down-At-Heels Gentleman
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 5. Further Concerning The Aforesaid Gentleman, One Anthony
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 6. Describes Certain Lively Happenings At The "Jolly Waggoner" Inn
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 7. White Magic
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 8. I Am Left Forlorn
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 9. Describes The Woes Of Galloping Jerry, A Notorious Highwayman
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 10. The Philosophy Of The Same
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 11. Which Proves Beyond All Argument That Clothes Make The Man
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 12. The Price Of A Goddess
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 13. Which Tells Somewhat Of My Deplorable Situation
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 14. In Which I Satisfy Myself Of My Cowardice
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 15. Proving That A Goddess Is Wholly Feminine
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 16. In Which I Begin To Appreciate The Virtues Of The Chaste Goddess
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 17. How We Set Out For Tonbridge
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 18. Concerning The Grammar Of A Goddess
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 19. How And Why I Fought With One Gabbing Dick, A Peddler
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 20. Of The Tongue Of A Woman And The Feet Of A Goddess
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 21. In Which I Learned That I Am Less Of A Coward Than I Had Supposed
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 22. Describing The Hospitality Of One Jerry Jarvis A Tinker
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 23. Discusses The Virtues Op The Onion
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 24. How I Met One Jessamy Todd, A Snatcher Of Souls
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 25. Tells Of My Adventures At The Fair
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 26. The Ethics Of Prigging
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 27. Juno Versus Diana
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 28. Exemplifying That Clothes Do Make The Man
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 29. Tells Of An Ominous Meeting
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 30. Of A Truly Memorable Occasion
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 31. A Vereker's Advice To A Vereker
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 32. How I Made A Surprising Discovery, Which, However, May Not Surprise The Reader In The Least
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 33. Of Two Incomparable Things. The Voice Of Diana And Jessamy's "Right"
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 34. The Noble Art Of Organ-Playing
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 35. Of A Shadow In The Sun
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 36. Tells How I Met Anthony Again
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 37. A Disquisition On True Love
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 38. A Crucifixion
   Book 1. The Silent Places - Chapter 39. How I Came Home Again
Book 2. Shadow
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 1. The Incidents Of An Early Morning Walk
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 2. Introducing Jasper Shrig, A Bow Street Runner
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 3. Concerning A Black Postchaise
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 4. Of A Scarabaeus Ring And A Gossamer Veil
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 5. Storm And Tempest
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 6. I Am Haunted Of Evil Dreams
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 7. Concerning The Song Of A Blackbird At Evening
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 8. The Deeps Of Hell
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 9. Concerning The Opening Of A Door
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 10. Tells How A Mystery Was Resolved
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 11. Which Shows That My Uncle Jervas Was Right, After All
   Book 2. Shadow - Chapter 12. How I Went Upon An Expedition With Mr. Shrig
Book 3. Dawn
   Book 3. Dawn - Chapter 1. Concerning One Tom Martin, An Ostler
   Book 3. Dawn - Chapter 2. I Go To Find Diana
   Book 3. Dawn - Chapter 3. Tells How I Found Diana And Sooner Than I Deserved
   Book 3. Dawn - Chapter 4. I Wait For A Confession
   Book 3. Dawn - Chapter 5. In Which We Meet Old Friends
   Book 3. Dawn - Chapter 6. Which, As The Patient Reader Sees, Is The Last