_ XI
LISA EROPKIN lived in a state of continual excitement.
The longer she lived a true Christian life as it had been revealed
to her, the more convinced she became that it was the right way,
and her heart was full of joy.
She had two immediate aims before her. The one was to convert Mahin; or,
as she put it to herself, to arouse his true nature, which was good and kind.
She loved him, and the light of her love revealed the divine element
in his soul which is at the bottom of all souls. But, further, she saw
in him an exceptionally kind and tender heart, as well as a noble mind.
Her other aim was to abandon her riches. She had first thought of
giving away what she possessed in order to test Mahin; but afterwards
she wanted to do so for her own sake, for the sake of her own soul.
She began by simply giving money to any one who wanted it. But her father
stopped that; besides which, she felt disgusted at the crowd of supplicants
who personally, and by letters, besieged her with demands for money.
Then she resolved to apply to an old man, known to be a saint by his life,
and to give him her money to dispose of in the way he thought best.
Her father got angry with her when he heard about it. During a violent
altercation he called her mad, a raving lunatic, and said he would take
measures to prevent her from doing injury to herself.
Her father's irritation proved contagious. Losing all control
over herself, and sobbing with rage, she behaved with the greatest
impertinence to her father, calling him a tyrant and a miser.
Then she asked his forgiveness. He said he did not mind
what she said; but she saw plainly that he was offended,
and in his heart did not forgive her. She did not feel
inclined to tell Mahin about her quarrel with her father;
as to her sister, she was very cold to Lisa, being jealous
of Mahin's love for her.
"I ought to confess to God," she said to herself. As all this happened
in Lent, she made up her mind to fast in preparation for the communion,
and to reveal all her thoughts to the father confessor, asking his advice
as to what she ought to decide for the future.
At a small distance from her town a monastery was situated, where an
old monk lived who had gained a great reputation by his holy life,
by his sermons and prophecies, as well as by the marvellous cures
ascribed to him.
The monk had received a letter from Lisa's father announcing the visit of his
daughter, and telling him in what a state of excitement the young girl was.
He also expressed the hope in that letter that the monk would influence
her in the right way, urging her not to depart from the golden mean,
and to live like a good Christian without trying to upset the present
conditions of her life.
The monk received Lisa after he had seen many other people,
and being very tired, began by quietly recommending her to be modest
and to submit to her present conditions of life and to her parents.
Lisa listened silently, blushing and flushed with excitement.
When he had finished admonishing her, she began saying with tears
in her eyes, timidly at first, that Christ bade us leave father
and mother to follow Him. Getting more and more excited,
she told him her conception of Christ. The monk smiled slightly,
and replied as he generally did when admonishing his penitents;
but after a while he remained silent, repeating with heavy sighs,
"O God!" Then he said, "Well, come to confession to-morrow,"
and blessed her with his wrinkled hands.
The next day Lisa came to confession, and without renewing
their interrupted conversation, he absolved her and refused
to dispose of her fortune, giving no reasons for doing so.
Lisa's purity, her devotion to God and her ardent soul, impressed the
monk deeply. He had desired long ago to renounce the world entirely;
but the brotherhood, which drew a large income from his work as
a preacher, insisted on his continuing his activity. He gave way,
although he had a vague feeling that he was in a false position.
It was rumoured that he was a miracle-working saint, whereas in
reality he was a weak man, proud of his success in the world.
When the soul of Lisa was revealed to him, he saw clearly into his
own soul. He discovered how different he was to what he wanted to be,
and realised the desire of his heart.
Soon after Lisa's visit he went to live in a separate cell as a hermit,
and for three weeks did not officiate again in the church of the friary.
After the celebration of the mass, he preached a sermon denouncing his own
sins and those of the world, and urging all to repent.
From that day he preached every fortnight, and his sermons attracted
increasing audiences. His fame as a preacher spread abroad.
His sermons were extraordinarily fearless and sincere, and deeply
impressed all who listened to him. _