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Adventures of Captain Horn, The
Chapter 17. "A Fine Thing, No Matter What Happens"
Frank R Stockton
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       _ CHAPTER XVII. "A FINE THING, NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS"
       After the noonday meal, on the day of Captain Horn's departure, Mrs.
       Cliff went apart with Maka and Cheditafa, and there endeavored to find
       out, as best she might, the ideas and methods of the latter in regard to
       the matrimonial service. In spite of the combined efforts of the two,
       with their limited command of English, to make her understand how these
       things were done in the forests and wilds of the Dark Continent, she
       could not decide whether the forms of the Episcopal Church, those of the
       Baptists, or those of the Quakers, could be more easily assimilated with
       the previous notions of Cheditafa on the subject. But having been married
       herself, she thought she knew very well what was needed, and so, without
       endeavoring to persuade the negro priest that his opinions regarding the
       marriage rites were all wrong, or to make him understand what sort of a
       wedding she would have had if they had all been in their own land, she
       endeavored to impress upon his mind the forms and phrases of a very
       simple ceremony, which she believed would embody all that was necessary.
       Cheditafa was a man of considerable intelligence, and the feeling that
       he was about to perform such an important ceremony for the benefit of
       such a great man as Captain Horn filled his soul with pride and a strong
       desire to acquit himself creditably in this honorable function, and he
       was able before very long to satisfy Mrs. Cliff that, with Maka's
       assistance as prompting clerk, he might be trusted to go through the
       ceremony without serious mistake.
       She was strongly of the opinion that if she conducted the marriage
       ceremony it would be far better in every way than such a performance by a
       coal-black heathen; but as she knew that her offices would not count for
       anything in a civilized world, whereas the heathen ministry might be
       considered satisfactory, she accepted the situation, and kept her
       opinions to herself.
       The wedding took place about six o'clock in the afternoon, on the plateau
       in front of the great stone face, at a spot where the projecting rocks
       cast a shade upon the heated ground. Cheditafa, attired in the best suit
       of clothes which could be made up from contributions from all his
       fellow-countrymen present, stood on the edge of the line of shadow, his
       hands clasped, his head slightly bowed, his bright eyes glancing from
       side to side, and his face filled with an expression of anxiety to
       observe everything and make no mistakes. Maka stood near him, and behind
       the two, in the brilliant sunlight, were grouped the other negroes, all
       very attentive and solemn, looking a little frightened, as if they were
       not quite sure that sacrifices were not customary on such occasions.
       Captain Horn stood, tall and erect, his jacket a little torn, but with an
       air of earnest dignity upon his handsome, sunburnt features, which, with
       his full dark beard and rather long hair, gave him the appearance of an
       old-time chieftain about to embark upon some momentous enterprise. By his
       side was Edna Markham, pale, and dressed in the simple gown in which she
       had left the ship, but as beautiful, in the eyes of Mrs. Cliff, as if she
       had been arrayed in orange-blossoms and white satin.
       [Illustration: Reverently the two answered the simple questions which
       were put to them.]
       Reverently the two answered the simple questions which were put to them,
       and made the necessary promises, and slowly and carefully, and in very
       good English, Cheditafa pronounced them man and wife. Mrs. Cliff then
       produced a marriage certificate, written with a pencil, as nearly as she
       could remember, in the words of her own document of that nature, on a
       leaf torn from the captain's note-book, and to this she signed
       Cheditafa's name, to which the African, under her directions, affixed his
       mark. Then Ralph and Mrs. Cliff signed as witnesses, and the certificate
       was delivered to Edna.
       "Now," said the captain, "I will go aboard."
       The whole party, Edna and the captain a little in the lead, walked down
       to the beach, where the boat lay, ready to be launched. During the short
       walk Captain Horn talked rapidly and earnestly to Edna, confining his
       remarks, however, to directions and advice as to what should be done
       until he returned, or, still more important, as to what should be done if
       he did not return at all.
       When they reached the beach, the captain shook hands with Edna, Mrs.
       Cliff, and Ralph, and then, turning to Cheditafa, he informed him that
       that lady, pointing to Edna, was now the mistress of himself and Mok, and
       that every word of command she gave them must be obeyed exactly as if he
       had given it to them himself. He was shortly coming back, he said, and
       when he saw them again, their reward should depend entirely upon the
       reports he should receive of their conduct.
       "But I know," said he, "that you are a good man, and that I can trust
       you, and I will hold you responsible for Mok."
       This was the end of the leave-taking. The captain stepped into his boat
       and took the oars. Then the four negroes, two on a side, ran out the
       little craft as far as possible through the surf, and then, when they had
       scrambled on board, the captain pulled out into smooth water.
       Hoisting his little sail, and seating himself in the stern, with the
       tiller in his hand, he brought the boat round to the wind. Once he turned
       toward shore and waved his hat, and then he sailed away toward the
       western sky.
       Mrs. Cliff and Ralph walked together toward the caves, leaving Edna alone
       upon the beach.
       "Well," said Ralph, "this is the first wedding I ever saw, but I must say
       it is rather different from my idea of that sort of thing. I thought that
       people always kissed at such affairs, and there was general jollification
       and cake, but this seemed more like a newfangled funeral, with the dear
       departed acting as his own Charon and steering himself across the Styx."
       "He might have kissed her," said Mrs. Cliff, thoughtfully. "But you see,
       Ralph, everything had to be very different from ordinary weddings. It was
       a very peculiar case."
       "I should hope so," said the boy,--"the uncommoner the better. In fact,
       I shouldn't call it a wedding at all. It seemed more like taking a first
       degree in widowhood."
       "Ralph," said Mrs. Cliff, "that is horrible. Don't you ever say anything
       like that again. I hope you are not going to distress your sister with
       such remarks."
       "You need not say anything about Edna!" he exclaimed. "I shall not worry
       her with any criticisms of the performance. The fact is, she will need
       cheering up, and if I can do it I will. She's captain now, and I'll stand
       up for her like a good fellow."
       Edna stood on the beach, gazing out on the ocean illuminated by the rays
       of the setting sun, keeping her eyes fixed on the captain's boat until it
       became a mere speck. Then, when it had vanished entirely among the lights
       and shades of the evening sea, she still stood a little while and
       watched. Then she turned and slowly walked up to the plateau. Everything
       there was just as she had known it for weeks. The great stone face seemed
       to smile in the last rays of the setting sun. Mrs. Cliff came to meet
       her, her face glowing with smiles, and Ralph threw his arms around her
       neck and kissed her, without, however, saying a word about that sort of
       thing having been omitted in the ceremony of the afternoon.
       "My dear Edna," exclaimed Mrs. Cliff, "from the bottom of my heart I
       congratulate you! No matter how we look at it, a rare piece of good
       fortune has come to you."
       Edna gazed at her for a moment, and then she answered quietly, "Oh, yes,
       it was a fine thing, no matter what happens. If he does not come back, I
       shall make a bold stroke for widowhood; and if he does come back, he is
       bound, after all this, to give me a good share of that treasure. So, you
       see, we have done the best we can do to be rich and happy, if we are not
       so unlucky as to perish among these rocks and sand."
       "She is almost as horrible as Ralph," thought Mrs. Cliff, "but she will
       get over it." _
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本书目录

Chapter 1. An Introductory Disaster
Chapter 2. A New Face In Camp
Chapter 3. A Change Of Lodgings
Chapter 4. Another New Face
Chapter 5. The Rackbirds
Chapter 6. Three Wild Beasts
Chapter 7. Gone!
Chapter 8. The Alarm
Chapter 9. An Amazing Narration
Chapter 10. The Captain Explores
Chapter 11. A New Hemisphere
Chapter 12. A Tradition And A Waistcoat
Chapter 13. "Mine!"
Chapter 14. A Pile Of Fuel
Chapter 15. The Cliff-Maka Scheme
Chapter 16. On A Business Basis
Chapter 17. "A Fine Thing, No Matter What Happens"
Chapter 18. Mrs. Cliff Is Amazed
Chapter 19. Left Behind
Chapter 20. At The Rackbirds' Cove
Chapter 21. In The Gates
Chapter 22. A Pack-Mule
Chapter 23. His Present Share
Chapter 24. His Fortune Under His Feet
Chapter 25. At The Palmetto Hotel
Chapter 26. The Captain's Letter
Chapter 27. Edna Makes Her Plans
Chapter 28. "Home, Sweet Home"
Chapter 29. A Committee Of Ladies
Chapter 30. At The Hotel Boileau
Chapter 31. Waiting
Chapter 32. A Mariner's Wits Take A Little Flight
Chapter 33. The "Miranda" Takes In Cargo
Chapter 34. Burke And His Chisel
Chapter 35. The Captain Writes A Letter
Chapter 36. A Horse-Dealer Appears On The Scene
Chapter 37. The "Arato"
Chapter 38. The Coast Of Patagonia
Chapter 39. Shirley Spies A Sail
Chapter 40. The Battle Of The Golden Wall
Chapter 41. The "Arato" Anchors Nearer Shore
Chapter 42. Inkspot Has A Dream Of Heaven
Chapter 43. Mok As A Vocalist
Chapter 44. Mr. Banker's Speculation
Chapter 45. Mental Turmoils
Chapter 46. A Problem
Chapter 47. A Man-Chimpanzee
Chapter 48. Enter Captain Horn
Chapter 49. A Golden Afternoon
Chapter 50. A Case Of Recognition
Chapter 51. Banker Does Some Important Business
Chapter 52. The Captain Takes His Stand
Chapter 53. A Little Gleam Afar