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Absalom’s Hair; and A Painful Memory
Chapter 3
Bjornstjerne Bjornson
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       Chapter 3
       It was a bright evening in the beginning of June that they
       disembarked from the steamer, and at once left the town in the
       boat which was to take them to Hellebergene. They did not know any
       of the boatmen, although they were from the estate; the boat also
       was new.
       But the islands among which they were soon rowing were the old
       ones, which had long awaited them and seemed to have swum out to
       meet them, and now to move one behind the other so that the boat
       might pass between them. Neither mother nor son spoke to the men,
       nor did they talk to each ether. In thus keeping silence they
       entered into each other's feelings, for they were both awestruck.
       It came upon them all at once. The bright evening light over sea
       and islands, the aromatic fragrance from the land,--the quick
       splash of a little coasting steamer as she passed them--nothing
       could cheer them.
       Their life lay there before them, bringing responsibilities both
       old and new. How would all that they were coming to look to them,
       and how far were they themselves now fitted for it?
       Now they had passed the narrow entrance of the bay, and rounded
       the last point beneath the crags of Hellebergene. The green
       expanse opened out before them, the buildings in its midst. The
       hillsides had once been crowned and darkly clad with luxuriant
       woods. Now they stood there denuded, shrunk, formless, spread over
       with a light green growth leaving some parts bare. The lowlands,
       as well as the hills which framed them, were shrunk and
       diminished, not in extent but in appearance. They could nut
       persuade themselves to look at it. They recalled it all as it had
       been and felt themselves despoiled.
       The buildings had been newly painted, but they looked small by
       contrast with those which they had in their minds. No one awaited
       them at the landing, but a few people stood about near the
       gallery, looking embarrassed--or were they suspicious? The
       travellers went into Fru Kaas's old rooms, both up stairs and
       down. These were just as they had left them, but how faded and
       wretched they looked! The table, which was laid for supper, was
       loaded with coarse food like that at a farmer's wedding.
       The old lime-trees were gone. Fru Kaas wept.
       Suddenly she was reminded of something. "Let us go across to the
       other wing," she said this as if there they would find what was
       wanting. In the gallery she took Rafael's arm; he grew curious.
       His father's old rooms had been entirely renovated for him. In
       everything, both great and small, he recognised his mother's
       designs and taste. A vast amount of work, unknown to him, an
       endless interchange of letters and a great expenditure of money.
       How new and bright everything looked! The rooms differed as much
       from what they had been, as she had endeavoured to make Rafael's
       life from the one that had been led in them.
       They two had a comfortable meal together after all, followed by a
       quiet walk along the shore. The wide waters of the bay gleamed
       softly, and the gentle ripple took up its old story again while
       the summer night sank gently down upon them.
       Early the next morning Rafael was out rowing in the bay, the play-
       ground of his childhood. Notwithstanding the shorn and sunken
       aspect of the hills, his delight at being there again was
       indescribable. Indescribable because of the loneliness and
       stillness: no one came to disturb him. After having lived for many
       years in large towns, to find oneself alone in a Norwegian bay is
       like leaving a noisy market-place at midday and passing into a
       high vaulted church where no sound penetrates from without, and
       where only one's own footstep breaks the silence. Holiness,
       purification, abstraction, devotion, but in such light and freedom
       as no church possesses. The lapse of time, the past were
       forgotten; it was as though he had never been away, as though no
       other place had ever known him.
       Indescribable, for the intensity of his feelings surpassed
       anything that he had hitherto known. New sensations, impressions
       of beauty absolutely forgotten since childhood, or remembered but
       imperfectly, crowded upon him, speaking to him like welcoming
       spirits.
       The altered contour of the hills, the dear familiar smell, the sky
       which seemed lower and yet farther off, the effects of light in
       colder tones, but paler and more delicate. Nowhere a broad plain,
       an endless expanse. No! all was diversified, full of contrast,
       broken; not lofty, still unique, fresh, he had almost said
       tumultuous.
       Each moment he felt more in accord with his memories, his nature
       was in harmony with it all.
       He paused between each stroke of the oars, soothed by the gentle
       motion; the boat glided on, he had not concerned himself whither,
       when he heard from behind the sound of oars which was not the echo
       of his own. The strokes succeeded each other at regular intervals.
       He turned.
       At that moment Fru Kaas came out on to the terrace with her big
       binocular. She had had her coffee, and was ready to enjoy the view
       over the bay, the islands, and the open sea. Rafael, she was told,
       had already gone out in the boat. Yes! there he was, far out. She
       put up her glass at the moment that a white painted boat shot out
       towards his brown one. The white one was rowed by a girl in a
       light-coloured dress. "Grand Dieu! are there girls here too?"
       Now Rafael ceases rowing, the girl does the same, they rest on
       their oars and the boats glide past each other. Fru Kaas could
       distinguish the girl's shapely neck under her dark hair, but her
       wide-brimmed straw hat hid her face.
       Rafael lets his oars trail along the water and resting on them
       looks at her, and now her oars also touch the water as she turns
       towards him. Do they know each other? Quickly the boats draw
       together; Rafael puts out his hand and draws them closer, and now
       he gives HER his hand. Fru Kaas can see Rafael's profile so
       plainly that she can detect the movement of his lips. He is
       laughing! The stranger's face is hidden by her hat, but she can
       see a full figure and a vigorous arm below the half-sleeve. They
       do not loose their hands; now he is laughing till his broad
       shoulders shake. What is it? What is it? Can any one have followed
       him from Munich? Fru Kaas could remain where she was no longer.
       She went indoors and put down the glass; she was overcome by
       anxiety, filled with helpless anger. It was some time before she
       could prevail on herself to go out and resume her walk. The girl
       had turned her boat. Now they are rowing in side by side, she as
       strongly as he. Whenever Fru Kaas looked at her son he was
       laughing and the girl's face was turned towards his. Now they head
       for the landing-place at the parsonage. Was it Helene? The only
       girl for miles round, and Rafael had hooked himself on to her the
       very first day that he was at home. These girls who can never see
       him without taking a fancy to him! Now the boats are beached, not
       on the shingle, where the stones would be slippery. No! on the
       sand, where they have run them up as high as possible. Now she
       jumps lightly and quickly out of her boat, and he a little more
       heavily out of his; they grasp each other's hands again. Yes!
       there they were.
       Fru Kaas turned away; she knew that for the moment she was nothing
       more than an old chattel pushed away into a corner.
       It was Helene. She knew that they had arrived and thought that she
       would row past the house; and thus it was that she had encountered
       Rafael, who had simply gone out to amuse himself.
       As they had lain on their oars and the boats glided silently past
       each other, he thought to himself, "That girl never grew up here,
       she is cast in too fine a mould for that; she is not in harmony
       with the place." He saw a face whose regular lines, and large grey
       eyes, harmonised well with each other, a quiet wise face, across
       which all at once there flew a roguish look. He knew it again. It
       had done him good before to-day. Our first thought in all
       recognitions, in all remembrances--that is to say, if there is
       occasion for it--is, has that which we recognise or recall done us
       good or evil?
       This large mouth, those honest eyes, which have a roguish look
       just now, had always, done him good.
       "Helene!" he cried, arresting the progress of his boat.
       "Rafael!" she answered, blushing crimson and checking her boat
       too.
       What a soft contralto voice!
       When he came in to breakfast, beaming, ready to tell everything,
       he was confronted by two large eyes, which said as plainly as
       possible, "Am I put on one side already?" He became absolutely
       angry. During breakfast she said, in a tone of indifference, that
       she was going to drive to the Dean's, to thank him for the
       supervision which he had given to the estate during all these
       years. He did not answer, from which she inferred that he did not
       wish to go with her. It was some time before she started. The
       harness was new, the stable-boy raw and untrained. She saw nothing
       more of Rafael.
       She was received at the parsonage with the greatest respect, and
       yet very heartily. The Dean was a fine old man and thoroughly
       practical. His wife was of profounder nature. Both protested that
       the care of the estate had been no trouble to them, it had only
       been a pleasant employment; Helene had now undertaken it.
       "Helene?"
       Yes; it had so chanced that the first bailiff at Hellebergene had
       once been agronomist and forester on a large concern which was in
       liquidation, Helene had taken such a fancy to him, that when she
       was not at school, she went with him everywhere; and, indeed, he
       was a wonderful old man. During these rambles she had learned all
       that he could teach her. He had an especial gift for forestry. It
       was a development for her, for it gave a fresh interest to her
       life. Little by little she had taken over the whole care of the
       estate. It absorbed her.
       Fru Kaas asked if she might see Helene, to thank her.
       "But Helene has just gone out with Rafael, has she not?"
       "Yes, to be sure," answered Fru Kaas. She would not show surprise;
       but she asked at once for her carriage.
       Meanwhile the two young people had determined to climb the ridge.
       At first they followed the course of the river, Helene leading the
       way. It was evident that she had grown up in the woods. How strong
       and supple she was, and how well she acquitted herself when she
       had to cross a brook, climb a wooded slope, force a way through a
       barrier of bristly young fir-trees which opposed her passage, or
       surmount a heap of clay at a quarry, of which there were a great
       many about there. Each difficulty was in turn overcome. The ascent
       from the river was the most direct and the pleasantest, which was
       the reason that they had come this way. Rafael would not be
       outdone by her, and kept close at her heels. But, great heavens!
       what it cost him. Partly because he was out of practice, partly--
       "It is a little difficult to get over here," she said. A tree had
       fallen during the last rainy weather, and hung half suspended by
       its roots, obstructing the path. "You must not hold by it, it
       might give way and drag us with it."
       At last there is something which she considers difficult, he
       thought.
       She deliberated for a moment before the farthest-spreading
       branches which had to be crossed; then, lifting her skirts to her
       knees, over them she went, and over the next ones as well, and
       then across the trunk to the farthest side, where there were no
       branches in the way; then obliquely up the hillside. She stood
       still at the top of the height and watched him crawl up after her.
       It cost him a struggle; he was out of breath and the perspiration
       poured off him. When he got up to her, everything swam before him;
       and although it was only for a fraction of a second, it left him
       fairly captivated by her strength,
       She stood and looked at him with bright, roguish eyes. She was
       flushed and hot, and her bosom rose and fell quickly; but there
       was no doubt that she could at once have taken an equally long and
       steep climb. He was not able to speak a word.
       "Now turn round and look at the sea," she said.
       The words affected him as though great Pan had uttered them from
       the mountains far behind. He turned his eyes towards them. It
       seemed as though Nature herself had spoken to him. The words
       caressed him as with a hand now cold, now warm, and he became a
       different being. For he had lost himself--lost himself in her as
       she walked along the river-bank and climbed the hillside. She
       seemed to draw fresh power from the woods, to grow taller, more
       agile, more vigorous. The fervour of her eyes, the richness of her
       voice, the grace of her movements, the glimpses of her soul, had
       allured him down there in the valley, beside the rushing river,
       and the feeling of loss of individuality had increased with the
       exertion and the excitement. No ball-room or play-ground, no
       gymnasium or riding-school can display the physical powers, and
       the spirit which underlies them, the unity of mind and body, as
       does the scaling of steep hills and rocky slopes. At last,
       intoxicated by these feelings, he thought to himself--I am
       climbing after her, climbing to the highest pinnacle of happiness.
       Up there! Up there! The composure of her manner towards him, her
       freedom from embarrassment, maddened him. Up there! Up there! And
       ever as they mounted she became more spirited, he more distressed.
       Up there! Up there! His eyes grew dim, for a few seconds he could
       not move, could not speak. Then she had said, "Now you must look
       at the sea."
       He seemed to see with different eyes, to be endowed with new
       sensations, and these new sensations gave answer to what the
       distant mountains had said. They answered the sea out there before
       him, the island-studded sea, the open sea beyond, the wide
       swelling ocean, the desires and destinies of life all the world
       over. The sea lay steel-bright beneath the suffused sunlight, and
       seemed to gaze on the rugged land as on a beloved child instinct
       with vital power. Cling thou to the mighty one, or thy strength
       will be thine undoing!
       And many of the inventions which he had dreamed of loomed vaguely
       before him. They lay outside there. It depended on him whether he
       should one day bring them safely into port.
       "What are you thinking about?" said she, the sound of her voice
       put these thoughts to flight and recalled him to the present. He
       felt how full and rich her contralto voice was, A moment ago he
       could have told her this, and more besides, as an introduction to
       still more. Now he sat down without answering, and she did the
       same.
       "I come up here very often," she said, "to look at the sea. From
       here it seems the source of life and death; down there it is a
       mere highway." He smiled. She continued: "The sea has this power,
       that whatever pre-occupation one may bring up here, it vanishes in
       a moment; but down below it remains with one."
       He looked at her.
       "Yes, it is true," said she, and coloured.
       "I do not in the least doubt it," he replied.
       But she did not continue the subject. "You are looking at the
       saplings, I see."
       "Yes."
       "You must know that last year there was a long drought; almost all
       the young trees up here withered away, and in other places on the
       hillsides also, as you see." She pointed as she spoke. "It looks
       so ugly as one comes into the bay. I thought about that yesterday.
       I thought also that you should not be here long before you saw
       that you had done us an injustice, for could anything be prettier
       than that little fir-tree down there in the hollow? just look at
       its colour; that is a healthy fellow! and these sturdy saplings,
       and that little gem there!" The tones of Helene's voice betrayed
       the interest which she felt. "But how that one over there has
       grown." She scrambled across to it, and he after her. "Do you see?
       two branches already; and what branches!" They knelt down beside
       it. "This boy has had parents of whom he can boast, for they have
       all had just as much and just as little shelter. Oh! the
       disgusting caterpillars." She was down before the little tree at
       the side which was being spun over. She cleared it, and got up to
       fetch some wet mould, which she laid carefully round the sprouts.
       "Poor thing I it wants water, although it rained tremendously a
       little time ago."
       "Are you often up here?" he asked.
       "It would all come to nothing if I were not!" She looked at him
       searchingly. "You do not, perhaps, believe that this little tree
       knows me; every one of them, indeed. If I am long away from them
       they do not thrive, but when I am often with them they flourish."
       She was on her knees, supporting herself with one hand, while with
       the other she pulled up some grass. "The thieves," said she,
       "which want to rob my saplings."
       If it had been a little person who had said this; a little person
       with lively eyes and a merry mouth--but Helene was tall and
       stately; her eyes were not lively, but met one with a steady gaze.
       Her mouth was large, and gave deliberate utterance to her
       thoughts.
       Whoever has read Helene's words quickly, hurriedly, must read them
       over again. She spoke quietly and thoughtfully, each syllable
       distinct and musical. She was not the same girl who had led the
       way by river and hill. Then she seemed to glory in her strength;
       now her energy had changed to delicate feeling.
       One of the most remarkable women in Scandinavia, who also had
       these two sides to her character, and made the fullest use of
       both, Johanne Luise Hejberg, once saw Helene when she had but just
       attained to womanhood. She could not take her eyes off her; she
       never tired of watching her and listening to her. Did the aged
       woman, then at the close of her life, recognise anything of her
       own youth in the girl? Outwardly too they resembled each other.
       Helene was dark, as Fru Hejberg had been; was about the same
       height, with the same figure, but stronger; had a large mouth,
       large grey eyes like hers, into which the same roguish look would
       start. But the greatest likeness was to be found in their natures:
       in Fru Hejberg's expression when she was quiet and serious; in a
       certain motherliness which was the salient feature in her nature.
       "What a healthy girl!" said she; bade some one bring Helene to
       her, and drawing her towards her, kissed her on the forehead.
       Helene and her companion had crossed to the other side of the
       hill, for he positively must see the "Buckthorn Swamp"; but when
       they got down there he did not know it again: it was covered by
       luxuriant woods.
       "Yes! It is old Helgesen who deserves the credit of that," she
       said. "He noticed that an artificial embankment had converted this
       great flat into a swamp, so he cut through it. I was only a child
       then, but I had my share in it. They gave me a bit of ground down
       by the river to plant Kohl Kabi in. I looked after it the whole
       summer. Later on I had a larger piece. With the profits we cut
       ditches up to here. In the fourth year we bought plants. In fact,
       he so arranged it, that I paid for it all with my work, the old
       rogue!"
       When Rafael got home his mother was at table: she had not waited
       for him, a sure sign that she felt aggrieved. No attempts on his
       part to set things right succeeded. She would not answer, and soon
       left the room. It now struck him how pleasant it would have been
       for his mother if he had taken her with him to explore and make
       acquaintance with this new Hellebergene. The evening before, in
       his father's rooms, it had seemed as though nothing could ever
       separate them--and the first thing in the morning he was off with
       some one else. This evening he knew that nothing could be done,
       but next morning he begged her earnestly to come with them, and
       they would show her what he had seen the day before; but she only
       shook her head and took up a book. Day after day he made a similar
       request, but always with the same result. She thought that these
       invitations were merely formal, and so, from one point of view,
       they were. He was most ready to appease her, most ready to show
       her everything, for he felt himself to blame, though he certainly
       thought that she might have understood; but her presence would
       have marred their tete-a-tete; he would have been embarrassed
       enough if she had acquiesced!
       The Dean, with his wife and daughter, came the following Sunday to
       return Fru Kaas's visit. She was politeness itself, and specially
       thanked Helene for her care of Hellebergene. Helene coloured
       without knowing why, but when Rafael also coloured, she blushed
       still deeper. This was the event of the visit; nothing else of
       importance occurred.
       In their daily walks through the fields and woods, the two young
       people soon exhausted the topic of Hellebergene. He took up
       another theme. His inventions became the topic of conversation. He
       had acquired, from his studies with his mother, an unusual
       facility in explaining his meaning, and in Helene he found a
       listener such as he had rarely before met with. She was
       sufficiently acquainted with the laws of nature to understand a
       simple description. But all the same it was not his inventions but
       himself that he discoursed on. He quite realised this, and became
       all the more eager. Her eyes made his reasoning clearer. He had
       never before had such complete faith in himself as when near her,
       and now no misgivings succeeded.
       Helene, however, had not hitherto known the direction and results
       of his studies. He was an engineer, that was all that she had
       heard on the subject. When he had told her more about it he rose
       considerably in her estimation. It was SHE now who began to feel
       constrained. At first she did not understand why she felt obliged
       to put more restraint upon herself. After a time she began to
       excuse herself from joining him, and their walks became more rare.
       "She had so much to do now."
       He did not comprehend the reason of this; he fancied that his
       mother might be to blame (which, by the way, was quite a mistake),
       and he grew angry. He was already greatly affronted that his
       mother had chosen to confound his former gallantries with his
       present attachment. He quite forgot that at first he had merely
       sought to amuse himself here as elsewhere. He gave himself up
       entirely to his passion, which would brook no hindrance, no
       opposition; it became majestic. In Helene he had found his future
       life.
       But her parents had grown less cordial of late owing to Fru Kaas's
       coldness, and the time came when all attempts to obtain meetings
       with Helene failed. He had never been so infatuated. He seemed to
       see her continually before him--her luxuriant beauty, her light
       step, her grey eyes gazing steadfastly into his.
       Why could they not be married to-morrow or the next day? What
       could be more natural? What could more certainly help him forward?
       The constraint between his mother and himself had reached a
       greater pitch than ever before. He thought seriously of leaving
       her and the country. He still had some money left, the proceeds of
       the patent, and he could easily make more. How irksome it became
       to him to go into the fields and woods without Helene! He could
       not study; he had no one to talk to; what should he do?
       Devote himself to boating!--row out far beyond the bay, right up
       to the town! One day, as he rowed along the coast, beyond the bay,
       he noticed that the clay and flag-stone formation in the hills and
       ridges was speckled with grey. Helene had told him how
       extraordinary it looked out there now that the trees were gone,
       but as they would have had to come out in the boat to see it he
       had let the remark pass. Now he decided to land there. The shore
       rose steeply from the water, but he scrambled up. He had expected
       to find limestone, but he could hardly believe his own eyes: it
       was cement stone! Absolutely, undoubtedly, cement stone! How far
       did it extend? As far as he could see; it might even extend to the
       boundary of the estate. In any case, here was sufficient for
       extensive works for many, many years, if only there were enough
       silica with the clay and lime. He had soon knocked off a few
       pieces, which he put into the boat, and set out for home to
       analyse them.
       Seldom had any one rowed faster than he did; now he shot past the
       islands into the bay, up to the landing-place before the house. If
       the cement stone contained the right proportions, here was what
       would make Helene and himself independent of every one; AND THAT
       AT ONCE!
       A little later, with dirty hands and clothes, his face bathed in
       perspiration, he rushed up to his mother with the result of his
       investigations.
       "Here is something for you to see."
       She was reading; she looked up and turned as white as a sheet.
       "Is that the cement stone?" she asked, as she put down her book.
       "Did you know about it?" he exclaimed, in the greatest
       astonishment.
       "Good gracious, yes," she answered. She walked across to the
       window, came back again, pressing her hands together. "So you have
       found it too?"
       "Who did before me?"
       "Your father, Rafael, your father, the first time that I was here,
       a little time before we were to leave." She paused. "He came
       rushing in as you did just now--not so quickly, not so quickly, he
       was weak in the legs, but otherwise just like you." She let her
       eyes rest, with a peculiar look, on Rafael's dirty hands. The
       hands themselves were not well shaped, they were almost exactly
       his father's.
       Rafael noticed nothing.
       "Had HE found the bed of cement stone, then?"
       "Yes. He locked the door behind him. I got up from my chair and
       asked him how he dared? He could hardly speak." She paused for a
       moment, recalling it all again. "Yes, and it was THAT stuff."
       "What did he say, mother?"
       She had turned to leave the room.
       "Your father believed that I had brought luck to the house."
       "And why was it not so, then?"
       She faced him quickly. He coloured.
       "Pardon, mother, you misunderstood me. I meant, why did it come to
       nothing about the cement?"
       "You did not know your father: there were too many hooks about him
       for him to be able to carry out anything."
       "Hooks?"
       "Yes! eccentricity, egotism, passion, which caught fast in
       everything."
       "What did he propose to do?"
       "No one was to be allowed to have anything to do with it, no one
       was to know of it, he was to be everything! For this reason the
       timber was to be cut down and sold; and when we were married--I
       say when we were married, the whole of my fortune was to be used
       as well."
       He saw the horror with which she still regarded it; she was
       passing through the whole struggle again; and he understood that
       he must not question her further. She made a gesture with her
       hand; and he asked hurriedly, "Why did you not tell me before,
       mother?"
       "Because it would have brought you no good," she answered
       decidedly.
       He felt, nay, he saw that she believed that it would bring him no
       good now. She again raised her hand, and he left her.
       When he was once more in the boat, taking his great news to the
       parsonage, he thought to himself, Here is the reason of my
       father's and mother's deadly enmity.
       The cement stone! She did not trust him, she would not give him
       both herself and her fortune, so there was no cement, nor were any
       trees felled.
       "Well, he scored after all. Yes, and mother too; but God help ME!"
       Then he reckoned up what the timber and the fortune together would
       have been worth, and what further sum could have been raised on
       the property, the value of the cement-bed being taken into
       consideration. He understood his father better than his mother.
       What a fortune, what power, what magnificence, what a life!
       At the parsonage he carried every one with him.
       The Dean, because he saw at once what this was worth. "You are a
       rich man now," he said. The Dean's wife, because she felt
       attracted by his ability and enthusiasm. Helene? Helene was silent
       and frightened. He turned towards her and asked if she would come
       with him in the boat to see it. She really must see how extensive
       the bed was.
       "Yes, dear, go with him," said her father.
       Rafael wished to sit behind her in the boat and hastened towards
       the bow; but, without a word, she passed him, sat down, and took
       her oars; so, after all, he had to sit in front of her.
       They thus began at cross purposes. His back was towards her, he
       saw how the water foamed under her oars, there was a secret
       struggle, a tacit fear, which was heard in the few words which
       they exchanged, and which merely increased their constraint.
       When they drew near to their destination they were flushed and
       hot. Now he was obliged to turn round to look for the place of
       landing. To begin with, they went slowly along the whole cement-
       bed as far as it was visible. He was now turned so as to face her,
       and he explained it all to her. She kept her eyes fixed on the
       cliff, and only glanced at him, or did not look at him all. They
       turned the boat again, in order to land at the place where he
       intended the factory to stand. A portion of the rock would have to
       be blasted to make room, the harbour too must be made safer so
       that vessels might lie close in, and all this would cost money.
       He landed first in order to help her, but she jumped on shore
       without his assistance; then they climbed upwards, he leading the
       way, explaining everything as he went; she following with eyes and
       ears intent.
       All for which, from her childhood, she had worked so hard at
       Hellebergene, and all which she had dreamed of for the estate, had
       become so little now. It would be many years before the trees
       yielded any return. But here was promise of immediate prosperity
       and future wealth if, as she never doubted, he proved to be
       correct. She felt that this humbled her, made her of no account,
       but ah! how great it made him seem!
       The rowing, the climbing, the excitement, gave animation to
       Rafael's explanations; face and figure showed his state of
       tension. She felt almost giddy: should she return to the boat and
       row away alone? But she was too proud thus to betray herself.
       It seemed to her that there was the look of a conqueror in his
       eyes; but she did not intend to be conquered. Neither did she wish
       to appear as the one who had remained at home and speculated on
       his return. That would be simply to turn all that was most
       cherished, most unselfish in her life, against herself. Something
       in him frightened her, something which, perhaps, he himself could
       not master--his inward agitation. It was not boisterous or
       terrifying; it was glowing, earnest zeal, which seemed to deprive
       him of power and her of will, and this she would not endure.
       Hardly had they gained the summit from which they could look out
       over the islands to the open sea, and across to Hellebergene, to
       the parsonage, and the river flowing into the inner bay, than he
       turned away from it all towards her, as she stood with heaving
       breast, glowing cheeks, and eyes which dare not turn away from the
       sea.
       "Helene," he whispered, approaching her; he wished to take her in
       his arms.
       She trembled, although she did not turn round; the next moment she
       sprang away from him, and did not pause till she had got down to
       the boat, which she was about to push off, but bethought herself
       that it would be too cowardly, so she remained standing and
       watched him come after her.
       "Helene," he called from above, "why do you run away from me?"
       "Rafael, you must not," she answered when he rejoined her. The
       strongest accent of both prayer and command of which a powerful
       nature is capable sounded in her words. She in the boat, he on the
       shore; they eyed one another like two antagonists, watchful and
       breathing hard, till he loosed the boat, stepped in and pushed
       off.
       She took her seat; but before doing the same he said:
       "You know quite well what I wanted to say to you." He spoke with
       difficulty.
       She did not answer and got out her oars; her tears were ready to
       flow. They rowed home again more slowly than they had come.
       A lark hovered over their heads. The note of a thrush was heard
       away inland. A guillemot skimmed over the water in the same
       direction as their own, and a tern on curved wing screamed in
       their wake. There was a sense of expectation over all. The scent
       of the young fir-trees and the heather was wafted out to them;
       farther in lay the flowery meadows of Hellebergene. At a great
       distance an eagle could be seen, high in air, winging his way from
       the mountains, followed by a flock of screaming crows, who
       imagined that they were chasing him. Rafael drew Helene's
       attention to them.
       "Yes, look at them," she said; and these few words, spoken
       naturally, helped to put both more at their ease. He looked round
       at her and smiled, and she smiled back at him. He felt in the
       seventh heaven of delight, but it must not be spoken. But the oars
       seemed to repeat in measured cadence, "It--is--she. It--is--she.
       It--is--she." He said to himself, Is not her resistance a thousand
       times sweeter than--
       "It is strange that the sea birds no longer breed on the islands
       in here," he said.
       "That is because for a long time the birds have not been
       protected; they have gone farther out."
       "They must be protected again: we must manage to bring the birds
       back, must we not?"
       "Yes," she answered.
       He turned quickly towards her. Perhaps she should not have said
       that, she thought, for had he not said "we"?
       To show how far she was from such a thought, she looked towards
       the land. "The clover is not good this year."
       "No. What shall you do with the plot next year?"
       But she did not fall into the trap. He turned round, but she
       looked away.
       Now the rush of the river tossed them up and down in a giddy
       dance, as the force of the stream met the boat. Rafael looked up
       to where they had walked together the first day. He turned to see
       if she were not, by chance, looking in the same direction. Yes,
       she was!
       They rowed on towards the landing-place at the parsonage, and he
       spoke once or twice, but she had learned that that was dangerous.
       They reached the beach.
       "Helene!" said he, as she jumped on shore with a good-bye in
       passing, "Helene!" But she did not stay. "Helene!" he shouted,
       with such meaning in it that she turned.
       She looked at him, but only remained for a moment. No more was
       needed! He rowed home like the greatest conqueror that those
       waters had ever seen. Ever since the Vikings had met together in
       the innermost creek, and left behind them the barrow which is
       still to be seen near the parsonage--yes, ever since the elk of
       the primaeval forest, with mighty antlers, swam away from the doe
       which he had won in combat, to the other which he heard on the
       opposite shore. Since the first swarm of ants, like a waving fan,
       danced up and down in the sunlight, on its one day of flight.
       Since the first seals struggled against each other to reach the
       one whom they saw lie sunning herself on the rocks.
       Fru Kaas had seen them pass as they rowed out at a furious pace.
       She had seen them row slowly back, and she understood everything.
       No sooner had the cement stone been found than--
       She paced up and down; she wept.
       She did not put any dependence on his constancy; in any case it
       was too early for Rafael to settle himself here: he had something
       very different before him. The cement stone would not run away
       from him, or the girl either, if there were anything serious in
       it. She regarded his meeting with Helene as merely an obstacle in
       the way, which barred his further progress.
       Rafael rowed towards home, bending to his oars till the water
       foamed under the bow of his boat. Now he has landed; now he drags
       the boat up as if she were an eel-pot. Now he strides quickly up
       to the house.
       Frightened, despairing, his mother shrank into the farthest corner
       of the sofa, with her feet drawn up under her, and, as he burst in
       through the door and began to speak, she cried out: "Taisez-vous!
       des egards, s'il vous plait." She stretched out her arms before
       her as if for protection. But now he came, borne on the wings of
       love and happiness. His future was there.
       He did what he had never done before: went straight up to her,
       drew her arms down, embraced and kissed her, first on the
       forehead, then on the cheeks, eyes, mouth, ears, neck, wherever he
       could; all without a word.
       He was quite beside himself.
       "Mad boy," she gasped; "des egards, mais Rafael, donc!--Que--" And
       she threw herself on his breast with her arms round his neck.
       "Now you will forsake me, Rafael," she said, crying.
       "Forsake you, mother! No one can unite the two wings like Helene."
       And now he began a panegyric on her, without measure, and
       unconscious that he said the same thing over and over again. When
       he became quieter, and she was permitted to breathe, she begged to
       be alone: she was used to being alone. In the evening she came
       down to him, and said that, first of all, they ought to go to
       Christiania, and find an expert to examine the cement-bed and
       learn what further should be done. Her cousin, the Government
       Secretary, would be able to advise them, and some of her other
       relations as well. Most of them were engineers and men of
       business. He was reluctant to leave Hellebergene just now, he
       said, she must understand that; besides, they had agreed not to go
       away until the autumn. But she maintained that this was the surest
       way to win Helene; only she begged that, with regard to her,
       things should remain as they were till they had been to
       Christiania. On this point she was inflexible, and it was so
       arranged.
       As was their custom, they packed up at once. They drove over to
       the parsonage that same evening to say good-bye. They were all
       very merry there: on Fru Kaas's side because she was uneasy, and
       wished to conceal the fact by an appearance of liveliness; on the
       Dean's part because he really was in high spirits at the discovery
       which promised prosperity both to Hellebergene and the district;
       on his wife's because she suspected something. The most hearty
       good wishes were therefore expressed for their journey.
       Rafael had availed himself of the general preoccupation to
       exchange a few last words with Helene in a corner. He obtained a
       half-promise from her that when he wrote she would answer; but he
       was careful not to say that he had spoken to his mother. He felt
       that Helene would be startled by a proceeding which came quite
       naturally to him.
       As they drove away, he waved his hat as long as they remained in
       sight. The waving was returned, first by all, but finally by only
       one.
       The summer evening was light and warm, but not light enough, not
       warm enough, not wide enough; there did not seem room enough in it
       for him; it was not bright enough to reflect his happiness. He
       could not sleep, yet he did not wish to talk; companionship or
       solitude were alike distasteful to him. He thought seriously of
       walking or rowing over to the parsonage again and knocking at the
       window of Helene's room. He actually went down to the boathouse
       and got out the boat. But perhaps it would frighten her, and
       possibly injure his own cause. So he rowed out and out to the
       farthest islands, and there he frightened the birds. At his
       approach they rose: first a few, then many, then all protested in
       a hideous chorus of wild screams. He was enveloped in an angry
       crowd, a pandemonium of birds. But it did not ruffle his good
       humour. "Wait a bit," he said to them. "Wait a bit, until the
       islands at Hellebergene are 'protected,' and the whole estate as
       well. Then you shall come and be happy with us. Good-bye till
       then!"
       Content of Chapter 3 [Bjornstjerne Bjornson's book: Absalom's Hair; and A Painful Memory]
       _