_ A thousand times in the night I reach out (it seems to me), and touch her hair as it lies spread and dark. A thousand times in the night I gaze upon her face, her eyes shielded, her lips gently closed and curved. A thousand times in the night (it seems to me), I bend above her and whisper, "I love you!" And she, though asleep and myriads of miles away among the stars, hears me always and stirs just faintly, and still sleeping whispers through lips that barely part, "I know!" It is perhaps that thing called Love which causes me to do this, because I always whisper, "I love you;" though no word quite is wide and deep and soft and kind enough to say what is in the soul at certain times.
Now in lives there are ways. Some have few sorrows and many things of fortune taken lightly, the things wished coming easily. Again, others gain only by pain and suffering and long effort and hard denyings. As it is decreed by chance, the way with most is to gain all things hardly, and to know always denial, and always to have longing. That is the way with most. Of these things I spoke with the Singing Mouse, and told of many things that came as sorrows and griefs and denials, saying that, since this was decreed by chance, there was naught that a man ought not to receive without murmur; and the Singing Mouse said that this was true, that many things were denied, and that many knew great sorrows. This was the reason we came to speak of sorrows. I named very many sorrows that I had known, and many that friends of mine had known, some of these far greater than my own; as is most often the case when one comes to see deeply into these things.
"All sorrows," said the Singing Mouse, "come to us, and we must bear them, though some are very hard to bear; as when friends do not know we love them, and think us ill-formed and crooked, small and mean, when in truth in soul we are tall and comely, large and strong. Or when we are thought to have done a bad action when in truth we have done a good one; or when hunger and thirst come and we have little comforts; or when sickness and weakness come to us when we wish our strength; or when those die whom we have loved. All, all these sorrows, and very many others, come to us; and each sorrow must be borne, for that is the way of life."
"What," I asked of the Singing Mouse, "is the greatest sorrow?"
"That," said the Singing Mouse, "is a thing hard to tell; for each man thinks that the sorrow that he has is the greatest sorrow for him or for the world; though perhaps in truth it is not large. What to you," asked the Singing Mouse, "is the greatest sorrow of those which have not yet come to you?"
... "A thousand times in the night, Singing Mouse," said I, "I reach out and touch her hair, as it lies spread and dark. I whisper to her, though she be myriads of miles away among the stars; and she hears; and she answers! This is because of that thing called Love. Now, this sorrow has not yet come to me; that when I reach out my hand in the night I shall not touch her hair; that when I bend to kiss her sleeping she shall not be there any more; that when I whisper to her she may no longer answer to me, seeing that this thing called Love can be no more between us. That," said I to the Singing Mouse, "I could not endure."
Indeed, at the thought of this, so sharp an agony came to me that I arose and cried out loud. "I can not endure it, I can not endure it!" I cried (although this sorrow had not yet come to me).
"Ah!" said the Singing Mouse, "how idle and weak is the human mind in the country where you live. Have you not said but now that, though she be myriads of miles away among the stars, she answers you when you whisper? Does she not hear? Do not her lips move in speech as you whisper?"
"That is true," said I. "And will she always hear?"
"She will always hear," said the Singing Mouse. "So this sorrow will not come as you fear."
"And shall I reach out and touch her hair as it lies spread and dark?" This I asked of the Singing Mouse.
"You shall touch it, spread and dark, and fragrant as when you were young," said the Singing Mouse, "if so you wish."
So then it seemed that perhaps all sorrows, even very great ones, are a part of life. Although I know that, if I could no longer know the fragrance of her hair, or hear the whisper of her answer, then that sorrow would be more than I could bear. _