_ CHAPTER XII
Captain Quinn made himself very agreeable to Mary O'Dwyer during the short journey back to Dublin. At Westland Row he saw her into a cab, which he paid for. His last words were a reminder that he would expect to have her war-song, music and all, sent after him to Paris. Then he turned to Hyacinth.
'That's all right. We've done with her. It was better to pay the cab for her, else she might have scrupled about taking one, and we should have been obliged to go home with her in a beastly tram. Come along. I'm staying at the Gresham. It's always as well to go to a decent place if you have any money. You come with me, and we'll have a drink and a talk.'
There were two priests and a Bishop in earnest conference round the fire in the hall of the hotel when they entered. When he discovered that their talk was of the iniquities of the National Board of Education, and therefore likely to last beyond midnight, Captain Quinn led the way into the smoking-room, which was unoccupied. A sufficient supply of whisky and a syphon of soda-water were set before them. The Captain stretched himself in a comfortable chair, and lit his pipe.
'A fine woman, Miss Goold,' he said meditatively. Hyacinth murmured an assent.
'A very fine woman, and apparently pretty comfortably off. I wonder why on earth she does it.'
He looked at Hyacinth as if he expected some sort of explanation to be forthcoming.
'Does what?' asked Hyacinth at length.
'Oh, all this revolutionary business: the
Croppy, seditious speeches, and now this rot about helping the Boers. What does she stand to gain by it? I don't suppose there's any money in the business, and a woman like that might get all the notoriety she wants in her own proper set, without stumping the country and talking rot.'
This way of looking at Augusta Goold's patriotism was new to Hyacinth, and he resented it.
'I suppose she believes in the principles she professes,' he said.
The Captain looked at him curiously, and then took a drink of his whisky-and-soda.
'Well,' he said, 'let's suppose she does. After all, her motives are nothing to us, and she's a damned fine woman, whatever she does it for.'
He drank again.
'It would have been very pleasant, now, if she would have spent the next few weeks with me in Paris. You won't mind my saying that I'd rather have had her than you, Conneally, as a companion in a little burst. However, I saw at once that it wouldn't do. Anyone with an eye in his head could tell at a glance that she wasn't that sort.'
He sighed. Hyacinth was not quite sure that he understood. The suggestion was so calmly made and reasoned on that it seemed impossible that it could be as iniquitous as it appeared.
'There's no one such an utter fool about women,' went on the Captain, 'as your respectable married man, who never does anything wrong himself. I'd heard of Miss Goold, as everybody has, and listened to discussions about her character. You know just as well as I do the sort of things they say about her.'
Hyacinth did know very well, and flared up in defence of his patroness.
'They are vile lies.'
'That's just what I'm saying. Those respectable people who tell the lies are such fools. They think that every woman who doesn't mew about at afternoon parties must be a bad one. Now, anyone with a little experience would know at once that Miss Goold--what's this the other one called her? Oh yes, Finola--that Finola may be a fool, but she's not
that.'
He pulled himself together as he spoke. Evidently he plumed himself, on his experience and the faculty for judging it had brought him.
'Now, I'd just as soon have asked my sister-in-law to come to Paris with me for a fortnight as Finola. You don't know Mrs. James Quinn, I think. That's a pity. She's the most domesticated and virtuous
haus-frau in the world.'
He paused, and then asked Hyacinth, 'Why are you doing it?'
Again Hyacinth was reduced by sheer surprise to a futility.
'Doing what?'
'Oh, going out to fight for the Boers. Now, don't, like a good fellow, say you're acting on principle. It's all well enough to give Finola credit for that kind of thing. She is, as we agreed, a splendid woman. But you mustn't ask me to believe in the whole corps in the same way.'
Hyacinth meditated a reply. It was clearly impossible to assert that he wanted to fight for liberty, to give his life to the cause of an oppressed nationality. It would be utterly absurd to tell the story of his father's vision, and say that he looked on the South African War as a skirmish preliminary to the Armageddon. Sitting opposite to this cynical man of the world and listening to his talk, Hyacinth came himself to disbelieve in principle. He felt that there must be some baser motive at the bottom of his desire to fight, only, for the life of him, he could not remember what it was. He could not even imagine a good reason--good in the estimation of his companion--why anyone should do so foolish a thing as go out to the Transvaal. The Captain was not at all impatient. He sat smoking quietly, until there seemed no prospect of Hyacinth answering; then he said:
'Well, if you don't want to tell me, I don't mind. Only I think you're foolish. You see, little accidents happen in these affairs. There are such things as bullets, and one of them might hit you somewhere that would matter. Then it would be my duty to send home your last words to your sorrowing relatives, and it would be easier to do that if I knew exactly what you had done. The death-bed repentance of the prodigal is always most consoling to the elder brother--much more consoling, in fact, than the prodigal's return. Now, how the deuce am I to make up a plausible repentance for you, if I don't know what you've done?'
'But I've not done anything,' said Hyacinth ineffectively.
The Captain ignored him.
'Come, now, it can't be anything very bad at your age. Have you got into a mess with a girl? Or'--he brightened up at the guess--'are you hopelessly enamoured of the beautiful Finola? That would be most suitable. The bold, bad woman sends the minstrel boy to his death, with his wild harp slung behind him. I could draw tears from the stoniest-hearted elder brother over that.'
If he could have thought of a crime at the moment, Hyacinth would probably have confessed it; but he was bewildered, and could hit on nothing better than:
'I have no elder brother--in fact, no relation of any sort.'
'Lucky man! Now, I have a perfect specimen of a brother--James Quinn, Esquire, of Ballymoy. He's a churchwarden. Think of that! If it should be your melancholy duty to send the message home to him--in case that bullet hits me, I mean--tell him------ Oh, there's no false pride about me. Fill your glass again. I don't in the least mind your knowing that I wouldn't go a step to fight for Boer or Briton either if it wasn't for a little affair connected with some horses and a cheque. You see, the War Office people sent down a perfect idiot to buy remounts for the cavalry in Galway and Mayo. He was the sort of idiot that would tempt an Archbishop to swindle him. I rather overdid it, I'm afraid, and now the matter is likely to come out.'
For all his boasted powers of observation, Captain Quinn failed to notice the disgust and alarm on Hyacinth's face.
'I stuck the fool,' he went on, 'with every old screw in the country. I got broken-winded mares from the ploughs. I collected a regular hospital of spavined, knock-kneed beasts, and he took them from me without a word at thirty pounds apiece. It would have been all right if I had gone no further. But, hang it all! I got to the end of my tether. I declare to you I don't believe there was another screw left in the whole county of Mayo, and unless I took to selling him the asses I couldn't go on. Then I heard of this plan of your friend Finola's, and I determined to make a little coup and clear. I altered a cheque. The idiot was on his way to an out-of-the-way corner of Connemara looking for mounted infantry cobs. I knew he wouldn't see his bank-book for at least a week, so I chanced it. That's the reason why I am so uncommonly anxious to get clear at once. If I once get off, it will be next door to impossible to get me back again. General Joubert will hardly give me up. I'm not the least afraid of those ridiculous policemen who walk about after Finola. But I am very much afraid of being tapped on the shoulder for reasons quite non-political. I can tell you I've been on the jump ever since yesterday, when I cashed the cheque, and I shan't feel easy till I've left France behind me. I fancy I'm safe for the present. The idiot is sure to try fifty ways of getting his accounts straight before he lights on my little cheque; and when he does, I've covered my tracks pretty well. My dear brother hasn't the slightest notion what's become of me. I dare say he'll stop making inquiries as soon as the police begin. Poor old chap! He'll feel it about the family name, and so on.'
He smiled at his own reflection in the mirror over the chimneypiece. He was evidently well satisfied with the performance he had narrated. Then at last Hyacinth found himself able to speak. Again, as when he had defeated Dr. Spenser in the college lecture-room, his own coolness surprised him.
'You're an infernal blackguard!' he said.
Captain Quinn looked at him with a surprise that was perfectly genuine. He doubted if he could have heard correctly.
'What did you say?'
'I said,' repeated Hyacinth, 'you are an infernal blackguard!'
'Did you really suppose that I would be going on this fool of an expedition if I wasn't?'
'I shall tell Miss Goold the story you have just told me. I shall tell her to-morrow morning before the boat sails.'
'Very well,' said the Captain; 'but don't suppose for a moment that you'll shock Finola. She doesn't know this particular story about me, but I expect she knows another every bit as bad, and I dare say she will regard the whole thing as a justifiable spoiling of the Egyptians. By the way '--there was a note of anxiety in his voice--'I hope you won't find it necessary to repeat anything I've said about the lady herself.
That might irritate her.'
'Is it likely,' said Hyacinth, 'that I would repeat that kind of talk to any woman?'
'Quite so. I admire your attitude. Such things are entirely unfit for repetition. But seriously, now, what on earth do you expect to happen when you tell her? I'm perfectly certain that every single volunteer she's got is just as great a blackguard--your word, my dear fellow--as I am, and Finola knows it perfectly well.'
Hyacinth hesitated. The phrase in Miss Goold's letter in which she had originally described her men as blackguards recurred to his mind. He remembered the story of Doherty. His anger began to give way to a sick feeling of disgust.
'Think, now,' said the Captain: 'is it likely that you could enlist a corps of Sunday-school teachers for this kind of work? I'll give you credit for the highest motives, though I'm blest if I understand them; but how can you suppose that there is anyone else in the whole world that feels the way you feel or wants to act as you are doing?'
'I dare say you are right,' said Hyacinth feebly.
'Of course I'm right--perfectly right.'
Hyacinth tried to lift his glass of whisky-and-water to his lips, but his hand trembled, and he was obliged to put it down. Captain Quinn watched him wipe the spilt liquid off his hand, and then settle down in his chair with his head bowed and his eyes half shut.
'Sit up, man,' he said. 'It's all right. You've done nothing to be ashamed of, at all events. But look here, you ought not to come with us at all.
It's no job for a man like you. You back out of it. Don't turn up to-morrow morning. I'll explain to Finola if she's there, and if not I'll write her a letter that will set you straight with her. I'm really sorry for you, Conneally.'
Hyacinth looked up at him.
'I'm sorry I called you a blackguard,' he said. 'You're not any worse than everyone else in the world.'
'Nonsense,' said Captain Quinn. 'Don't take it like that. From your point of view you were quite right to call me a blackguard. And, mind you, there are plenty of people in the world who aren't blackguards. There's my brother, for instance. He's a bit of a prig--in fact, he's as priggish as he well can be--but he's never done anything but run straight. I don't suppose he could go crooked if he tried.'
Hyacinth got up.
'Good-night,' he said, 'and good-bye. I shan't go with you.'
'Wait a minute,' said Captain Quinn. 'I think I've done you one good turn to-night in stopping you going to South Africa. Now I'll do you another, and one at the same time to that brother of mine. I left him in a hurry. I told you that, but I don't think I mentioned that I was in his employment. He runs a woollen factory down in Mayo. I owned a share in the business once, but that went long ago, and the whole thing belongs to James now. I was a sort of clerk and general agent. I wasn't really the least use, for I never did any work. James was for ever complaining, but I'm bound to say he stuck to me. I'll give you a letter to him, and I dare say you may get the job that I've chucked. It's not much of a thing, but it may suit you for a while. Sit down till I write my letter.'
Hyacinth obeyed. Since his anger evaporated a sort of numbness had crept over his mind. He scarcely understood what was said to him. He had a vague feeling of gratitude towards Captain Quinn, and at the same time a great desire to get away and be alone. He felt that he required to adjust his mind to the new thoughts which had been crowded into it. When he received the letter he put it into his pocket, and rose again to go. The Captain saw him to the door.
'Good-bye.' Hyacinth heard him, but his voice seemed far off, and his words meaningless. 'Take my advice and run down to Ballymoy at once. Don't hang about Finola any more. She's a splendid woman, but she's not for you. If you married her you'd be perfectly miserable. Not that I think she'd ever marry you. Still, she might. Women do such odd things. If by any chance she does, you'll have to be very careful. Give her her head, and take her easy up to the jumps. Don't try to hustle her, and for God's sake don't begin sawing at her mouth. I'd very much like to be here to see you in the character of Mr. Augusta Goold.' He sighed. 'But, of course, I can't. The British Isles will be too hot for me for a while. However, who can tell what might happen if I win a good medal from old Kruger, and capture a few British Generals? I might act best man for you yet, if you'll wait a year or two.'
When Hyacinth got home to his lodgings the first object that met his eye was Grealy's ancient rifle. He tied a label round its barrel addressed to the owner. Then he packed his few belongings carefully and strapped his bag. So far he was sure of himself. He had no doubt whatever that he must leave Dublin at once. He felt that he could not endure an interview with Augusta Goold. She might blame him or might pity him. Either would be intolerable. She might even justify herself to him, might beat him into submission by sheer force of her beauty and her passion, as she had done once before. He would run no such risk. He felt that he could not sacrifice his sense of right and wrong, could not allow himself to be dragged into the moral chaos in which, it seemed to him now, Miss Goold lived. He was unconscious of any Divine leading, or even of any direct reliance on the obligations of honour. He could not himself have told why he clung with such desperate terror to his plan of escaping from his surroundings. Simply he could not do certain things or associate as a friend with people who did them. To get away from Dublin was the first necessity. For a moment it occurred to him that he might go to Dr. Henry, tell him the whole story, and ask for advice and help. But that was impossible. How could he confess the degradation of his ideal? How could he resist the inevitable reminder that he had been warned beforehand? Besides, not even now, after all that he had seen, could he accept Dr. Henry's point of view. He still believed in Ireland, still hoped to serve her, still looked for the coming of his father's captain to lead the saints to the final victory. Miss Goold had failed him, but he was not yet ready to enrol himself a citizen of England.
No, he must leave Dublin. But where to go? His lamp burnt dim and expired as he sat thinking. His fire had long ago gone out. He shivered with cold and misery, while the faint light of the dawn stole into his room. He heard the first twitter of the birds in the convent garden behind his lodging. Then came the noise of the earliest traffic, the unnaturally loud rattle of the dust-carts on their rounds. A steamer hooted far away down the river, and an early bell rang the neighbouring nuns to prayer. Hyacinth grew desperate. Could he go home, back to the fishing-boats and simple people of Carrowkeel? A great desire for the old scenes seized upon him. He fought against it with all his might. He had rejected the offer of the home life once. Now, no doubt, it would be closed against him. The boat that might have been his was sold long ago. He would not go back to confess himself a fool and a failure.
Gradually his mind worked back over the conversation in the hotel with Captain Quinn. The recollection of the latter part of it, which had meant nothing at the time, grew clear. He felt for the letter in his pocket, and drew it out. After all, why should he not offer himself to James Quinn? Ballymoy was remote enough to be a hiding-place. It was in County Mayo, the Captain had said. He had never heard of the place, and it seemed likely that no one else, except its inhabitants, knew of it either. At least, there was no reason that he could see why he should not go there. His brain refused to work any longer, either at planning or remembering. His lips formed the word Ballymoy. He repeated it again and again. He seemed to go on repeating it in the troubled sleep which came to him. _